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Articles from Tina Tessina | Selfgrowth.com
- Dear Dr. Romance: I am allowing my narcissistic ex to run circles around me - by Submitted on Aug 02, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance I am mindful that I am allowing my soon to be controlling, narcissist ex ( civil law attorney) to run circles around me, just as we did when we were married. After attending a divorce group session at my local church, they recommend that I set up some specific boundaries ...
Views: 1527 - Relating With Love - by Submitted on May 12, 2013 from Tina TessinaWhy do relationship counselors, speakers and authors say repeatedly that your relationship depends on how well you communicate with each other? Because marriage is a partnership and to create teamwork, you need to keep each other informed, and keep yourself aware of your partner’s ideas, wants ...
Views: 1524(2 votes) - Attitude Adjustment - by Submitted on Jul 28, 2014 from Tina TessinaI have written in this column recently about emotional hygiene, and doing the necessary maintenance on feelings as well as your physical body and household. Health reminders tell us to wash our hands frequently to prevent transmittal of diseases. Did you know you can “wash” your ...
Views: 1523 - The Power of Purpose - by Submitted on Jun 14, 2014 from Tina Tessina“Whatever your age, if you learn to listen, your inner voice will speak to you about your path,” writes oncologist Dr. Bernie Siegel in Peace, Love and Healing, your ‘job on earth.’ This wisdom that is directing you from within is your birthright... an inner message, an ...
Views: 1523 - Dear Dr. Romance: How can I make my family understand I love him? - by Submitted on Nov 28, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: Ok so I am 19 and am kinda falling for a guy who is 20 years old than me. I am not asking your opinion on if it's wrong and nor do I want to hear "that's disgusting" my mother and father were 23 years apart in age. I like older guys cause I can relate to them better than guys ...
Views: 1521(1 vote) - Dr. Romance: 4 Tips for handling Post-holiday blues - by Submitted on Jan 19, 2011 from Tina TessinaDr Romance writes: Everyone is relieved when the holidays are over, and sometimes disappointed. If you're worn out, it's worth your while to take the time to recharge a little, and pamper yourself. Here are some hints: * If you are disappointed, and the holidays let you down in some way, ...
Views: 1520 - How Not to Fight-Myths about Fighting In Relationships, And What to Do About Them. - by Submitted on Oct 06, 2014 from Tina TessinaIn my counseling practice, couples are often surprised to learn they can communicate and solve problems effectively without fighting; but sometimes you may find it’s not so easy to give up your struggles. You may have trouble letting go of the fighting habit because of two factors: social ...
Views: 1519 - Dear Dr. Romance: at funerals, how do you comfort families in mourning? - by Submitted on May 16, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: What suggestions can you offer for guests at funerals in regards to comforting families in morning? Thanks! Dear Reader: Your presence at the memorial or funeral, honoring their loved one who passed, is the most comfort, so go if you can. When you are greeting ...
Views: 1514 - Dear Dr. Romance: If I am not strong, I cannot be an example for my children - by Submitted on Sep 19, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I am mid-thirties mom with 3 children looking to divorce. I read your article "Family Violence Q & A" and I decided to write to you for help to stand on my feet again. I was a homemaker since I had my first child, but had lived very unfulfilled ...
Views: 1514 - Dr. Romance: 5 Common Mistakes in Relationships - 5 Common Mistakes when Asking your Spouse for What You Want - by Submitted on Jun 29, 2013 from Tina TessinaThere are some common mistakes couples make when asking for what they want in a relationship. Here are some things that may be keeping you from achieving success with your spouse. They are the most common mistakes you can make when trying to ask for what you want when you're struggling to make ...
Views: 1514(3 votes) - Dr. Romance On Your Heart's Desire - by Submitted on Sep 25, 2017 from Tina TessinaYour heart's desire -- what could it be? So many people, including many of my clients, are searching to know what it is would satisfy them, to give their lives focus and direction. "To find in ourselves what makes life worth living is risky business," writes Marsha Sinetar ...
Views: 1511(1 vote) - Dr. Romance’s 3 tips to finding true love - by Submitted on Dec 02, 2013 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance’s 3 tips to finding true love: 1. Know the difference between fooling around and building a real relationship. You can mess around with anyone (if you’re careful and have safe sex) but before you bring someone into your life, or share money or living space, remember they’re ...
Views: 1510(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I am not sure there's any turning back - by Submitted on Aug 22, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: My wife and I have been married for 5 years. We got married quickly - after only 9 months due to a couple of reasons. We have been fighting fairly regularly for several years -- and I think it comes down to us not having much in common - which I ultimately resent her ...
Views: 1507(4 votes) - Emotional Self-Control - by Submitted on Jul 07, 2015 from Tina TessinaOne of the most powerful ways I found to stop being a doormat in relationships was to learn emotional self-control. When you’re too reactive to your partner, he or she can easily draw you into a fight that stops you both from focusing on fixing the problem. Self-control is not easy. In ...
Views: 1507(2 votes) - Dear Dr. Romance: He would like to have sex every time he thinks about it. - by Submitted on Aug 23, 2016 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: My partner says I turn him on which means, it seems to me, that he would like to have sex every time he thinks about it. It's almost too much and I don't know how to handle it. My background with sex, including the children's dad, has been: ...
Views: 1504(2 votes) - Dear Dr. Romance: I'm married but I love somebody else - by Submitted on May 18, 2015 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance I really admire how you advise people, please help me too. I'm married and I love my husband very much, but I love somebody else so much I don't know why although people say you can't love 2 people at the same time but I do. coz I love him very much and ...
Views: 1504 - Dear Dr. Romance: What Causes One To Constantly Sabotage Oneself? - by Submitted on Jun 03, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: What causes one to constantly sabotage oneself? Why would someone constantly put up their own roadblocks? Dear Reader: Being out of touch with one's own wants and needs is a primary way to self-sabotage. Getting in your own way is all about how you relate your ...
Views: 1504(1 vote) - Will Your Relationship Last? 7 Must Read Questions. - by Submitted on Jul 06, 2013 from Tina TessinaNumber 7 Might Shock You The way to know if your romance will last is to observe your partner's past and present behavior, especially in group settings, and to learn the proven skills to make marriage work. Because I see so much of the damage caused by people blindly connecting, rushing ...
Views: 1504(1 vote) - A Good Cry - by Submitted on Mar 09, 2014 from Tina TessinaAt the end of a client-packed day, the trash can in my office is often overflowing with used tissues. Richard, seeing this, usually comments; “Good day, huh?” and we both laugh. He knows that, when clients cry, they’re usually breaking through and healing something. I’ve ...
Views: 1503(1 vote) - How Not To Be A Wicked Stepparent - by Submitted on Nov 24, 2013 from Tina Tessina4 Real Ways To Make It Work Are you a stepparent? Are you struggling to make the right decisions for your newly created family? If so, here are four tips to help. 1. Give your blended family a chance to bond. Don’t worry if everyone doesn’t settle in right away; bonding takes time. ...
Views: 1502(1 vote) - Friends With Benefits - by Submitted on Feb 17, 2014 from Tina TessinaIf you’re thinking about having sex with a friend, be very careful, because it is not easy to preserve a friendship once you have sex. We think we can control our feelings, but it's not so simple. • If one of you becomes romantically attached as a result of the sex, ...
Views: 1501 - Dr. Romance: Into Each Life - by Submitted on Sep 20, 2017 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: As a parade went by, one of the horses pulling a float entry left a memento in the middle of the road right in front of where we were watching from the sidewalk. From that point on, every band or group that came marching down the road marched bravely on, right through the ...
Views: 1500(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I discovered she is lesbian - by Submitted on Jun 23, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: Nine months ago, I met a girl on Facebook. my words about many subject attract her , then she add me as her friends, and I discovered that she is lesbian. Before that, I didn'tknow there was lesbian world but when we chat I get to know her very ...
Views: 1497 - Dear Dr. Romance: It's tuff on me waiting for her to get it together. - by Submitted on Jun 23, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: How can I sign up for your Happiness Tips newsletter? I want to read "The One Who Got Away." Also which article would you recommend reading in my case? I met a wonderful lady who loves dancing like I do, and for almost 8 months she has been getting her house ...
Views: 1496 - Dr. Romance Happiness Tip: Alone on Valentine's Day? - by Submitted on Feb 14, 2013 from Tina TessinaDr Romance’s Happiness Tips Alone on Valentine’s Day? There's no need to mope around. Having a plan that makes you happy is the best way to fend off the blues. Gather your best friends around you and make some special plans to have a wonderful day. Send valentines or ...
Views: 1496(3 votes) - Dr. Romance on shared laughter - by Submitted on Aug 18, 2014 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: A lighthearted approach to serious matters often is the most productive one. Imagine what your days would be like if you focused on having fun and making yourself and your partner laugh. Fun is also good for your health: Telling your partner the cute thing your kid said (or ...
Views: 1496(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: Why this compulsion to cheat? - by Submitted on Feb 05, 2018 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I'm looking at myself and asking the question, "Why this compulsion to cheat?" What will it take to keep my eye from wandering around? I'm divorced, technically, but trying to make amends with the ex. I love my kids, and an absentee father just doesn't fit my ...
Views: 1495(1 vote) - Dr. Romance: Finding your Next Spouse - by Submitted on Sep 01, 2013 from Tina TessinaYou're divorced and ready to look for a new love. Here are three tips to help you as you search for a new partner in life. 1. Know the difference between fooling around and building a real relationship. You can mess around with anyone (if you’re careful and have safe sex) but before you ...
Views: 1495(2 votes) - From Struggling to Solving - by Submitted on Jul 14, 2014 from Tina TessinaHealthy relationships are built on a foundation, or infrastructure, of clear thinking, problem solving, and mutual support. Any willing couple can learn to build a happy relationship, if they stop reacting and learn to respond thoughtfully. As an individual you have ideas and beliefs about how ...
Views: 1495 - Dear Dr. Romance: I loved her then and I love her today - by Submitted on Dec 14, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I have read several of your comments in articles on the dadsdivorce.com website concerning when to introduce a new girlfriend to your children. I have a unique situation. I have been divorced for over a year two teenage boys. A few months ago a woman I met long ...
Views: 1490 - How To Avoid Loving a Jerk - by Submitted on May 29, 2015 from Tina TessinaAs I was swimming last week, a young couple came into the pool. Instead of doing laps or walking, like most of the gym members, they were just enjoying themselves. He started splashing her, and she said “Joey, stop it!” but she said it in a placating, whiney voice. He just kept ...
Views: 1490(2 votes) - 7 Must Do's Before Moving In - by Submitted on Jan 26, 2014 from Tina TessinaNumber Seven May Be A Little Shocking Dr. Romance’s three tips to maintaining sanity during divorce. According to results from a recent GfK Roper poll, more than 80 percent of divorced Americans still believe in marriage, but we all know more than half of marriages don’t make it, for ...
Views: 1489 - Dear Dr. Romance: I recently discovered numerous women he text messages - by Submitted on Jul 08, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I have just read your article "Keys to a Happy Relationship" and would be greatful for some advice. I havn't been with my partner long. We are both in our twenties and we met a few months ago and already live together because it's the only way we could see ...
Views: 1488(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: You're giving advice on what YOU consider normal - by Submitted on Jul 21, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance:Thank you for your free articles, you have a lot of good stuff in there. A couple of the girls at work and I read your articles and get a good laugh. You're giving advice assuming that our lives are what YOU consider normal. You have a good job, make good money, live in a ...
Views: 1485 - Dear Dr. Romance: Is she bipolar or what? - by Submitted on Jun 17, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I'm in need of some help. My partner has had some emotional problems and I don't know what they are. is she bipolar or what else? She gets angry about everything and is very negative, she is very incecure and thinks I dont love her even if I told her 10 mins ...
Views: 1483 - Fair Fight Guidelines - by Submitted on Mar 17, 2014 from Tina TessinaThirty years of marriage counseling and twenty-five years of a second marriage have convinced me that fights are not necessary in a marriage. Married couples need to have discussions, they need to solve problems, and sometimes they need to disagree, but they don’t need to squabble, argue, ...
Views: 1483 - How to Be Irresistible to Your Mate - by Submitted on Apr 13, 2014 from Tina TessinaOnce upon a time, In high school, I memorized a poem that has been a constant source of help and direction in my life and relationships. It’s simple and much more sentimental than today’s cynical age can handle, but the very simplicity of it made it a great navigational tool for me ...
Views: 1483 - Aspects of Love - by Submitted on Feb 10, 2014 from Tina TessinaAh, love! What rapturous, torturous words have been set down to try and capture the essence of love. Those clever Greeks, who invented the Olympics, also invented many names for love—Cupid, Eros, Venus, Aphrodite—and each name represented an aspect of love. The ancient Greeks had several words ...
Views: 1479 - Dear Dr. Romance: He said I was a false friend. - by Submitted on Jul 10, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance, I love reading your articles here and on Divine Caroline, and I always look forward to the new ones. I have a long time online friend. We have been friends for about three-four years, and I even felt I was in love with him for a while - and told him so. He said he ...
Views: 1477 - Dear Dr. Romance: I keep telling him not to push me. - by Submitted on Feb 25, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I find your articles very interesting. I have a minor problem with my husband. he keeps telling me that I don't listen and that I am stubborn. I admit my mind goes blank sometimes because he expects a lot from me and treats me like a teenager. I keep ...
Views: 1477(5 votes) - Year of Peace - by Submitted on Jan 02, 2014 from Tina TessinaHappy New Year, everyone! This is the time when a lot of energy is spent on making resolutions, most of which we don’t manage to keep. So, this year, I propose a different kind of resolution. Will you join me in resolving to create a year of peace? Peace begins inside yourself. When you ...
Views: 1476 - Dear Dr. Romance: she is in denial and wants to escape the pain - by Submitted on Oct 22, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: My best girlfriend ever and I dated for about eight months, then had a long distance relationship when she went back to her home country. She just broke up with me over email and she is dating someone from her home city for the last month. I thought we were ...
Views: 1475(1 vote) - Weaving The Web - by Submitted on Feb 02, 2013 from Tina TessinaOprah Winfrey opened her school in South Africa in January, and was both praised and criticized. The criticism was that she was spending too much money on too few girls, because her school was lavish, free, and could only accommodate less than 200 girls. Aside from the fact that Oprah is ...
Views: 1474(3 votes) - Dear Dr. Romance: I'm having problems with my Daughter-In-Law - by Submitted on Nov 03, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I'm having problems with my daughter in law . I I love her. She and my son had a relationship for more than fifteen years and were married for six. They have two preschool age children. I always thought My daughter-in-law and I got along, but now we can only ...
Views: 1473 - Your Job on Earth - by Submitted on Mar 31, 2013 from Tina TessinaIn Peace, Love and Healing, Dr. Bernie Siegel says: “Whatever your age, if you learn to listen, your inner voice will speak to you about your path... your ‘job on earth.’ This wisdom that is directing you from within is your birthright... an inner message, an inner awareness, that says, ‘This is ...
Views: 1473(2 votes) - Dear Dr. Romance: What behavior does a control freak have? - by Submitted on Sep 26, 2017 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I recently read "Could He/She be a Control Freak?" and I suddenly found information that seemed to pertain to a failed marriage that I was still pondering about. I am wondering, if a person had a chaotic childhood ...
Views: 1470(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: he can't forgive me because I did it first. - by Submitted on Jun 30, 2014 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I'm in high school and going through a rough patch in my relationship I have been with my boyfriendFor 17 months, sort of on an off, but 5 months ago we broke up and I slept With another male an yesterday he told me he had sex with another female after I told him ...
Views: 1469 - Coping with Critics - by Submitted on Mar 03, 2014 from Tina TessinaNo one likes to be criticized, fairly or not. It’s always difficult to deal with, and it can hurt. Because I’m a writer of books and columns, and because I’ve lectured, appeared on radio and TV, I am sometimes recognized in public. I’m glad I’m not more ...
Views: 1467(1 vote) - How To Write A Love Letter - by Submitted on May 15, 2014 from Tina TessinaWriting has a powerful effect on our emotional state. The following exercise is designed to help you fully express feelings that may have lain dormant for a long time, or may be too intense and jumbled for your to process effectively. You’ll find it helpful in expressing what you feel, ...
Views: 1467 - The One Who Got Away - by Submitted on May 04, 2013 from Tina TessinaWhen I was a girl, growing up in the small township of Rockland, New York, there was a tiny post office, which was a small room with a separate entry in the house next door. Rockland’s official postmistress was Clara Weiss, who seemed very elderly even when I was a very small child. She was what ...
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