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Articles from Tina Tessina | Selfgrowth.com
- Dear Dr. Romance: I Do My Best to Stay in My Loving Heart - by Submitted on Sep 20, 2012 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: Quite honestly, all the info in "Lighten Up - Cures for Marital Boredom" is great. But if your list of reccomendations were a test, we have failed everyone or most of them. I am walking lightly around here, just knowing, somehow, somewhere in time, we will find our way back ...
Views: 1881(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I don't know how to choose a man - by Submitted on Feb 18, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: You give good advice and I really like the articles you have here. I wish I could apply it to my life. I have married and divorced twice and i always tell myself "I don't know how to choose a man". But is it the man or me who is wrong? I ...
Views: 1566(2 votes) - Dear Dr. Romance: I don't know if this is retaliation - by Submitted on Feb 07, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I recently read "Does First-Love ever die? How to deal with a flame that still flickers" While my situation doesn't parallel the situations you described in the article, it's very similar. About 8-9 mos ago, I ran into a highschool crush on a social ...
Views: 1677(2 votes) - Dear Dr. Romance: I Don't Want to be the Victim of any Jezebel - by Submitted on Jan 24, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I am a gentle young graduate of about 30 years. Throughout my staying on the campus, I decided not to enter into any real relationship that could eventually lead to marriage (I mean I had nothing in common with girls). Now, I need a life partner, wish must be a graduate ...
Views: 1611(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I don't want to resent my wife - by Submitted on Oct 18, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I read your article "Attitude Adjustment" and some of the things you said really resonated. In recent years, I have found myself developing more and more resentment toward my wife (who thinks very differently than I do). I want to dissolve ...
Views: 1848(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I just got my girlfriend pregnant and I might be gay. - by Submitted on Dec 09, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I've just gotten my girlfriend pregnant and still have doubts about my sexuality, whether I'm gay or bisexual. She wants me to get some clarity before she decides to keep the baby or not. Can you help? Dear Reader: Your girlfriend is right to want you to know what ...
Views: 1612(4 votes) - Dear Dr. Romance: I just miss her a lot - by Submitted on Aug 26, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I found your article about women dating younger men. So, here I'm in a middle of a crisis... hope you can read it and hope you can give some advise. I'm 30, with a promising carreer and a stable job. A year ago, I met a woman, who's seven years older and ...
Views: 1568(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I love a deaf girl with all my heart - by Submitted on Sep 16, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I am confused I am dating a deaf girl and I love her with all my heart. The problem is she likes to party sleeping around and in the community they have noticed it. They keep complaining about deaf gals but sometimes I want to cry coz I love that girl so ...
Views: 2183(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I threw temper tantrums, broke things, yelled and demanded a divorce - by Submitted on Oct 10, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I'm a middle eastern single mother in my late twenties. suffering from depression and stress. As a child, I always wanted extra care and attention from my parents. I was closer to my father than my mother. When I was molested by an uncle, I complained to my parents ...
Views: 1591(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I'm in my seventies and he's 25 years younger - by Submitted on Oct 28, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance I'm in my seventies, and he is 25 years younger.we met on a senior dating site almost two years ago, and have been living together for over a year. He and my daughter went to the same high school, and he says he was attracted to me then and always compared his other ...
Views: 1451(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: I'm struggling with dismissing bad behavior - by Submitted on Jul 22, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: You state in the Yahoo article "Signs You Must Move On": "Women often have a very hard time ending relationships, even if deep down they know they're unhealthy. They fear change, they fear being single or they think they won't ...
Views: 1793(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: My baby momma is a lesbian and wants me to marry her. - by Submitted on Aug 08, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I have had baby with this girl and we are planning to marry this year. Just last we were talking about things we do not like and the things that we like. I said she was unfaithful before we had the baby and she said that not true but that she was lesbian was ...
Views: 2616(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: My husband is curious about sex with men. - by Submitted on Oct 21, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: My husband and I have been happily married for 9 years, and we have a good sex life. We love each other very much,and want to grow old together. He served two wars in Iraq. About two years ago, I started being concerned about his sexual behavior relating to men. He used to ...
Views: 2196(2 votes) - Dear Dr. Romance: My wife has been unhappy with me for years. - by Submitted on Feb 28, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I came across your name in an article on Yahoo titled "More Couples Sleeping Apart: Is ThisHealthy?". I am a thirtysomething man living on the West Coast. My wife and I have been together for ten years, married for six. We have three small children, and my ...
Views: 1952(2 votes) - Dear Dr. Romance: She cannot forgive all the hurt I have caused her - by Submitted on Jan 23, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance I came across your name in an article on Yahoo titled "More Couples Sleeping Apart: Is This Healthy?". My wife and I have been together since for over ten years, and have 3 children. and my wife has a daughter from a previous relationship. We ...
Views: 1867(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: She doesn't believe that I'm trying to find a job. - by Submitted on Jun 13, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: My wife she wil get angry very easily. Even for simple things she gets very angry. She always tells me to leave her and she wants to live her family especially with her mother. She tells me she doesn't want to live and mostly she hurts her self. The biggest problem is ...
Views: 1569(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: she wanted to still be friends - by Submitted on Sep 26, 2013 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I knew a girl for a long time and had a huge crush on her. I'm in my twenties, and she is a year younger than me. I am a very shy person and would freeze up whenever I tried to tell her. We knew each other for more than a year and were good friends, so I told her, trying ...
Views: 1698(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: Why Do I Always Have Sex on the First Date? - by Submitted on Dec 10, 2012 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: I'm trying to find out why I always have sex on the first date. This is not to say that I have sex with every girl I date, or even that every girl I've gone out with has even been interested in me. It is simply to say that the overwhelming majority of my "situations" have ...
Views: 1944(1 vote) - Dear Dr. Romance: Why Is There No Support Line for Men? - by Submitted on Sep 25, 2012 from Tina TessinaDear Dr. Romance: Thank you for writing "Lighten Up - Cures for Marital Boredom." Please allow me to give my opinion as to my priorities. I always had the idea to start from the bottom of your list and go upwards. Work together to create a partnership. Sex is important in life, but not number ...
Views: 2005(1 vote) - Dr. Romance on Dealing with Disappointment or failure - by Submitted on Nov 11, 2013 from Tina TessinaDr. Romance writes: OK, so you're disappointed. Your dream has ended in the trashbin. So, after you get finished with laying on the floor, kicking your heels, and screaming; or going on a drunken binge, or beating someone up, you find you're still disappointed, and all that acting out ...
Views: 2734(1 vote) - Dr. Romance: Ending your Marriage - by Submitted on Dec 29, 2013 from Tina TessinaRelationships: 3 Tips to Know when to Get Out of your Marriage and File For Divorce As a counselor, I’ve helped lots of couples solve difficult relationship problems, but it isn’t always possible. Here are three reasons to know it’s time to let it go: 1. Your partner keeps going out of ...
Views: 1709(1 vote) - Dr. Romance: Is your Partner too Selfish? - by Submitted on Oct 04, 2013 from Tina TessinaRelationships: Tips to Recognize if your Partner is Emotionally Abusive Ever look around at who stays married, and who doesn't? Overweight people far outnumber the thin and beautiful in successful marriages. The svelte and attractive get far more dates, but don't seem as able to close the ...
Views: 1716(4 votes) - Dr. Romance: Make your Marriage Work - by Submitted on Jan 18, 2014 from Tina TessinaRelationships: Three Tips to Getting your Marriage Back on Track Every relationship has its ups and downs. Is your marriage struggling right now? If you're trying to get it back on track, here are tips to help. 1. Don’t hold a grudge. Talk about what’s bothering you in a rational way. ...
Views: 1734(1 vote) - Dr. Romance: Spouse's Child - by Submitted on Oct 06, 2013 from Tina TessinaInfidelity: 3 Tips on Finances after your Spouse's Girlfriend Has a Child It’s not the first thing everyone thinks of, but the existence of an out-of-wedlock child will have a big economic impact, and the financial responsibility will grow with the child. 1. Unless you can settle with ...
Views: 1461(1 vote) - Four Secrets To A Happy Marriage - by Submitted on Nov 04, 2013 from Tina TessinaSave Your Relationship With 4 Easy Steps Dr. Romance’s four simple steps to create a successful marriage. 1. Talk frequently and honestly to each other. Share your ideas and issues about sex, about anger, about disappointment, about your appreciation of each other, about the meaning of ...
Views: 1545(1 vote) - How Not To Be A Wicked Stepparent - by Submitted on Nov 24, 2013 from Tina Tessina4 Real Ways To Make It Work Are you a stepparent? Are you struggling to make the right decisions for your newly created family? If so, here are four tips to help. 1. Give your blended family a chance to bond. Don’t worry if everyone doesn’t settle in right away; bonding takes time. ...
Views: 1502(1 vote) - Humor & Hope - by Submitted on Feb 24, 2013 from Tina TessinaShe was an Italian immigrant in New Jersey, a hard-working, frugal, Catholic single mother who lost her husband in WWII. She spent most days of her life as a “spooler” in a thread factory, retiring just before her job was automated. Her English was good, but she didn’t always catch the finer ...
Views: 1540(2 votes) - Want To Stay Married? 4 Must Do's - by Submitted on Jul 21, 2013 from Tina TessinaNumber Four Is A Must In Any Relationship 1. Talk frequently and honestly to each other. You should talk about frustrations, sex, anger, disappointment, about your appreciation of each other, about the meaning of life, about everything. No topic should be off limits. Learn to listen and ...
Views: 1328(1 vote) - Wanted: Older Men - by Submitted on Aug 04, 2013 from Tina TessinaSeniors today are still of a generation that doesn't want to seem to plan for sex. And there's no need for birth control, so that motivation for condom use doesn't exist. Also, senior men may not have as inevitable erections as they did when younge, so that may make them reluctant to use ...
Views: 1428(1 vote) - How to Stretch Time - by Submitted on May 25, 2013 from Tina TessinaIt is indeed possible to stretch time—to make the time you have go farther, and use it more for what you really want to do. Stretching time is not difficult if you have the prerequisites: self-awareness, a sense of purpose, thoughtful action, and a playful approach. Self-Awareness: As with ...
Views: 1948 - 10 Reasons For Not Falling in Love - by Submitted on Mar 07, 2014 from Tina TessinaAlthough you might think of “falling in love” as romantic; we all fall in love many times in life: with a new lover, a new friend, a particularly cooperative co-worker, an appealing movie or TV star, a caring neighbor, siblings, relatives and even pets. Any close relationship ...
Views: 1766 - 4 Tips for a Cheater: Get Your Marriage Back on Track - by Submitted on Jan 11, 2016 from Tina TessinaTo recover from infidelity and save your marriage: 1. Tell the Truth. Assuming your spouse found out, you didn't confess—this is the time to tell the whole truth. It's probably best done with a therapist present, to keep a lid on the emotional reactions. 2. Give your Spouse the ...
Views: 1643 - 7 Must Do's Before Moving In - by Submitted on Jan 26, 2014 from Tina TessinaNumber Seven May Be A Little Shocking Dr. Romance’s three tips to maintaining sanity during divorce. According to results from a recent GfK Roper poll, more than 80 percent of divorced Americans still believe in marriage, but we all know more than half of marriages don’t make it, for ...
Views: 1489 - Apology and Forgiveness - by Submitted on Mar 10, 2012 from Tina TessinaIn my clinical experience, I've encountered many clients who are afraid to admit they’re wrong. This comes from a culture of blaming and accusing—where one's early family may have picked a “culprit” when something went wrong, and focused on blame, rather than on fixing the problem and healing ...
Views: 2011 - Apology and Forgiveness - by Submitted on Aug 08, 2014 from Tina TessinaIn my clinical experience, I've encountered many clients who are afraid to admit they’re wrong. This comes from a culture of blaming and accusing—where one's early family may have picked a “culprit” when something went wrong, and focused on blame, rather than on fixing the ...
Views: 1581 - Asking for What You Want - by Submitted on Mar 17, 2012 from Tina TessinaIn my counseling office, I see a lot of damage done because people don't know how to ask for what they want, or don't think it's OK. Not asking for what you want means you'll eventually resent somebody, and that leads to a lot of strife. So today, I thought I'd give some hints about how to ask ...
Views: 1824 - Asking for What you Want - by Submitted on Sep 22, 2014 from Tina Tessinab> In my counseling office, I see a lot of damage done because people don’t know how to ask for what they want, or don’t think it’s OK. Not asking for what you want means you’ll eventually resent somebody, and that leads to a lot of strife. So today, I thought ...
Views: 1314 - Aspects of Love - by Submitted on Feb 10, 2014 from Tina TessinaAh, love! What rapturous, torturous words have been set down to try and capture the essence of love. Those clever Greeks, who invented the Olympics, also invented many names for love—Cupid, Eros, Venus, Aphrodite—and each name represented an aspect of love. The ancient Greeks had several words ...
Views: 1479 - Attitude Adjustment - by Submitted on Apr 10, 2012 from Tina TessinaI have before about emotional hygiene and doing the necessary maintenance on feelings as well as your physical body and household. Health reminders tell us to wash our hands frequently to prevent transmittal of diseases. Did you know you can “wash” your mood, too, and give yourself an attitude ...
Views: 1832 - Attitude Adjustment - by Submitted on Jul 28, 2014 from Tina TessinaI have written in this column recently about emotional hygiene, and doing the necessary maintenance on feelings as well as your physical body and household. Health reminders tell us to wash our hands frequently to prevent transmittal of diseases. Did you know you can “wash” your ...
Views: 1523 - Attitude: From Negative to Gratitude - by Submitted on Nov 10, 2014 from Tina TessinaDespite the occasional temporary setback, my life is good, and I’m grateful. It wasn’t always that way, however. At 18, just after I left for college, I was essentially orphaned, and have had to go from no education or support to finding a purpose, supporting myself through a ...
Views: 1236 - Autonomy vs Dependency - by Submitted on Jun 07, 2014 from Tina TessinaSelf-determination and self-respect are the necessary keys to take full responsibility for and control over your own life. Without these keys, it’s easy to be caught up in the fantasy that there is someone else who will make it better, who can or should take total care of you, ...
Views: 1865 - Caring For Parents = Divorce? - by Submitted on Sep 22, 2013 from Tina Tessina7 Tips To Keep Your Marriage On Track When Helping Family Members If your parents are elderly and becoming infirm, or if there are others who require special care in your family, due to disability or illness the situation you will need to figure out how to maintain a balance between your ...
Views: 1663 - Comforting the Little Orphan Girl - by Submitted on Apr 21, 2012 from Tina TessinaWhen life hands me a very difficult time, and I feel defeated and overwhelmed, I enter a hopeless and helpless state of mind I think of as The Little Orphan girl. This is the way I felt, as a teen, when I lost nearly my whole family, father, aunts and uncles, between the ages of 12 and 18. ...
Views: 1775 - Comforting the Little Orphan Girl - by Submitted on Oct 22, 2014 from Tina TessinaWhen life hands me a very difficult time, and I feel defeated and overwhelmed, I enter a hopeless and helpless state of mind I think of as The Little Orphan girl. This is the way I felt, as a teen, when I lost nearly my whole family, father, aunts and uncles, between the ages of 12 and 18. ...
Views: 1403 - Couples Can Cooperate for Success - by Submitted on Mar 09, 2015 from Tina TessinaYou have probably entered relationships madly in love, convinced that your feelings for each other were so strong your dream would carry you through the tough times, but wound up feeling more like you were living in a nightmare than a dream, struggling with conflicting wants and needs. If you ...
Views: 1318 - Creating Connections: Draw Them In - by Submitted on Nov 30, 2014 from Tina TessinaMany years ago, an Edwin Markham poem inspired me, and I’ve tried to live by it Outwitted by Edwin Markham He drew a circle that shut me out — Heretic, rebel, a thing to flout. But Love and I had the wit to win: We drew a ...
Views: 1163 - Creating Holiday Magic - by Submitted on Sep 20, 2013 from Tina TessinaRecently, as we were eating in an Italian restaurant, the music being played transported me back to holidays with my Italian/American family. Traditional, sentimental Italian songs were such a large part of our gatherings for the holidays. After a huge, slow, multi-course dinner, Uncle Tommy ...
Views: 1337 - Creating Holiday Magic - by Submitted on Dec 21, 2014 from Tina TessinaRecently, as we were eating in an Italian restaurant, the music being played transported me back to holidays with my Italian/American family. Traditional, sentimental Italian songs were such a large part of our gatherings for the holidays. After a huge, slow, multi-course dinner, Uncle Tommy ...
Views: 1165 - Creating Unconditional Love - by Submitted on May 27, 2012 from Tina TessinaLove, commitment and relationships seem to be in disfavor these days. I’m seeing a lot of articles and TV shows saying love doesn’t last, so why bother. But, I believe that all of us want to be loved, and I know from experience that a relationship can work, and that a great partnership is a joy ...
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