How to Deal with Situational Stress

For the purpose of this article let me give you my definition of situational stress. Situational stress is the stress associated with being near or around a particular person, place, or thing. There will always be a negative event associated with this type of stress. One example for me was an event which happened when I was a karate student. One night we were doing a running jump kick into a punching bag and I kicked up instead of into the bag. This caused me to have a terrible fall which was extremely painful. Every time we practiced that particular technique I was filled with anxiety because I remembered the pain of the first attempt.

Situational stress can also be caused by a thing such as a boss at work. It can be caused when you enter a high crime area or a dangerous place. It is stress that you don’t deal with twenty four hours per day. Prolonged stress is the type of stress which a soldier stationed in a combat zone experiences because he or she is always in danger. There may be situational stress also when he or she in involved in a firefight. Another example of prolonged stress is that which occurs when a person is in a bad financial situation. In that situation the bills are always there and the stress of not being able to pay them remains also. The only way to get rid of this type stress is to get rid of the problem. A soldier in a combat zone won’t feel the stress of the dangers associated with being there if he is removed from combat.

The same can be true in a sense when dealing with situational stress. The best way to avoid it is to avoid the situation which causes it. This is not always possible so you have to have some way to deal with the situation when it occurs. If the problem is another person and you are the timid type you may have to tie up your boot strings and deal with it a few times or it won’t go away. I have a friend who is controlling and demanding. The problem that I am having is that this person likes to give orders. For whatever reason, he feels that he can give them to me. The problem is that I have a problem taking orders. There have been many times when he has made requests of me and I have done it but the requests are turning into direct orders. I thought that I had dealt with the situation once before but it seems to be happening again. I will have to try to be more aware now and conduct myself accordingly when I am in his company. I am not a controlling person so I generally don’t give his requests another thought. Now I will have to ignore all requests because whenever I oblige them he will feel that he has the right to begin to give me orders. That just ain’t gonna work. I will have to remember to be aware of this person’s behavioral pattern when I am around him and not fall into whatever pattern that has caused all of this to happen. The painful thing for me is that I have to try to be aware at all times of what could happen if I don’t pay careful attention to the situation. It’s a drag but at the same time it’s a must. The biggest thing is that you need to get on top of any unfavorable situation and take control of it. If the situation is one where you are dealing with a person he or she might not want to relinquish the control that they have over you. In this situation things will get worse before they get better. The best way to deal with this type person is to just remain calm and speak in a low voice. Stand your ground and don’t allow them to move you or intimidate you. The intimidation that they cause is what they feed on so you need to starve them out.
Some times your negative experience which can be associated with a place or event, such as my incident with the missed kick. The only remedy for the anxiety caused by this type of situation is to expose yourself to it until it no longer causes you any anxiety. In other words you may have to take small doses at a time until you are over your anxiety. The Good Life