Who The Hell Do You Think You Are?
No Really...
...who do you think you are?
I ask because before we can talk about our self image, it would behoove us to know just what a self image is. My research over the years taught me that the problem even with the phrase self image, is that we use this phrase to mean three completely different things that get lumped into 'self images'. The problem is that only one of these three things are true self images.
Those three processes are:
Our relationship to the environment.
Our relationship to the tribe (today that means anyone who can reach us electronically as well as physically.
Our relationship to our self.
Only the last one can be called a true self image.
The first one has to do with how we learn about our relationship to the environment, the same way that other animals are taught by their parents about dangers etc.
The last one, the relationship to the tribe is what causes most of our problems. Every advertisement, every inducement to buy something, every time someone says to you that you have a problem, but wait...buy this and it will go away, those are what I have come to call Relationship Tags. By calling them such, I remove them from my idea that not being the right size, shape, smell, gender, age, etc...isn't about me... it is about what they want me to be for their reasons.
An honest and open look into those things you don't like about yourself will show that many of these things matter only as to how they affect their opinion of you.
Just try to think about how many things you have learned about yourself, that want' influenced by other people's opinion, and you start to realize just how few true self images you actually have.
When I started researching self images for my book “Through the Door!”: A Journey to the Self I realized that language, our very vocabulary, is a culprit in learning about our true selves. As long as we group concepts into a few words, we can't separate them in our mind, and as a consequence start to think about them as one thing. Almost every question that I have been asked regarding self image is a question about Relationship Tags.
Who the hell do you think you are, is a valid question. I'll grant you that when you've heard that question before, it wasn't really meant as a question, rather, it was the opening shot of a monologue by someone who would proceed to tell you under no uncertain terms who you 'really' were.
This being a forum is not the place to go into so much detail about the creation of self images, but I invite you to download a few chapters from my book HERE and start thinking of the possibility that you are so much greater and magnificent than you have ever imagined.
Phil L. Méthot is a Montréal, Canada Author and Lecturer. His Book "Through the Door!": A Journey to the Self shows us how to take back our power from negative self images.
Phil has lectured across Canada, and at sea in more than 60 cruises. His website Methotology.com deals with all aspects of Motivation and personal development.