We all experience setbacks in life from time to time - setbacks like losing an important business order, the break-up of a valued relationship, or losing a job. When this happens, even a small event can send you over the edge, creating an unwanted crisis in confidence.
Here are 7 steps you can implement that will help you to take back control of yourself, and your life.
1. Ignore External Stimuli
You must learn to ignore external stimuli. Don’t be affected by what people say or are likely to say about you. More important, you should not be worried about failure. Believe in the old adage that you cannot win always.
There are bound to be failures and setbacks in life despite your best efforts. Take them in your stride. If you can objectively look at what you could have done differently, you can use the setback as a learning opportunity. Better still, this helps to bring in other views of the situation, allowing you to reframe things more positively. This is the first step in helping to rebuild your self-confidence.
2. Track Your Success
Keep track of your success. Maintain a diary and note down all positive things that happen during the course of the day. You will be surprised to note the number of positive things that are happening around you, which can be easily missed.
Tracking your successes and referring to them will help to lessen the stranglehold of negative thoughts that can lower your self-esteem and generate doubts about your abilities and skills. Repeat to yourself every day that you are getting better at what you do, and feel the difference.
3 Examine Your Inter- Personal Relationships
Take some time to examine your inter- personal relationships. If a friend is having a bad influence on your self-confidence, or if the relationship is more of a burden than a pleasure, you may need to put some distance between you and them.
On the other side of the equation, you may need to build new relationships with people you like and admire, and who are supportive of you. Ideally, form a group of supportive friends and give them your support in turn. This support system can go a long way in helping to counteract and offset the negativity of your other, less supportive, intimate relationships.
4 Focus Only on The Areas Where You Have Control
Stop wasting your energy on things that can go wrong. Think about the worst thing that could possibly happen. You will realize that it is not the end of the world. Focus on the subjects over which you have control and reduce your exposure to events over which you have little or no control. Monitor your internal dialogue, and silence the negative voice that keeps criticizing you.
5 Use the Power of Visualization to Your Advantage
A useful strategy in helping to overcome your confidence crisis is to visualize a situation that bothers or worries you. Jot down these points. Think of people who have successfully crossed these hurdles, and remind yourself that if they could do it then so can you. Take a look at what they did, and how they acted. Remember success leaves clues and it is up to us to follow up on them. Make this a habit. You will find that you, too, can overcome obstacles.
6 Stand in Your Personal Power
Find your voice and stand in your personal power. You must learn to be comfortable with speaking up and expressing your opinions. In hesitating to speak, you are doing yourself a great disservice. Very often, you can become a prisoner of your own shyness. You want to speak, but your shyness does not let you do so. This eats into your self-esteem and self-confidence. Don’t allow this situation to continue.
Take the time to gather your thoughts and express your ideas. This serves to reinforce to yourself that your opinions are just as valid as everyone else’. This in turn helps to boost your belief in yourself.
7 Focus on Implementing Simple Self-Care
Self-confidence is more than a simple state of mind. It also flows from your physical well-being. Regular exercise adds to your energy levels, and makes you feel fitter and more confident. Don’t negate the simple power of restful sleep and adequate hydration. These simple activities can make a significant difference and are all within your control.
Don’t allow setbacks to send you into a tailspin of negativity and self-doubt that can damage your self-confidence. Instead, use these 7 steps to help you get back in the game.
Imposter Syndrome Your Kickass Guide to Recovery - an online course for entrepreneurs that helps to address issues with Imposter Syndrome. To find out more, click here.
Veronica Hislop is the founder of Em-Powered-Solutions
Women's Transformation Strategist and "Ninja Stress Busting Warrior." To find out more about her services click here.
She is currently the creator of the new online course
Impostor Syndrome Your Kickass Guide to Recovery
To find out more click here.