VENUS RX’S FALL FOLLIES: All Our Karmic Kinks Are Coming Up for Review

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“In most of our human relationships, we spend much of our time reassuring one another that our costumes of identity are on straight.”
RAM DASS

Dear One,

Welcome to Venus Retrograde, one of my favorite retrograde cycles as a karmic astrologer. This transit, which occurs every 18 months and last for about 45 days, has some very interesting effects on us and our relationships.

This year, the dates for Venus RX are from September 2 through until December 17, if we include the shadow periods (which I always do) and lasts for 3 1/2 months. The exact stations are: October 5 and November 16.

This is going to be a particularly intense and quirky Venus RX cycle for a number of reasons. Firstly, Lover Venus will be traveling through what is known as the via combusta, a stretch of the zodiac from 15° Libra to 15° Scorpio, which creates added layers of complexity and depth, especially since Venus is ruled by relationship-oriented Libra and is specifically focused on our erotic natures in passionate Scorpio.

Added to this unique Venus RX period, we have three passes of unpredictable Uranus and Venus in a challenging dance, or opposition by aspect. As natal Uranus, when in aspect with Venus or Mars, may govern our sexual predilections, it’s this opposition which will bring up all of our karmic kinks or eccentricities to be reviewed. Not just in ourselves, but also in how well they are expressed (or not) in our most important love relationships.

Cosmic Trickster of Awakening Uranus is also retrograde during this period and will be moving backwards from sensual Taurus to 29° Aries, which I consider to be the epitome of volatility. I’ve written about this in detail in my last newsletter:

In the Midst of a Crazy-Making Uranus Station
The Pull Towards Midsummer Madness Feels Irresistible

So, what types of karmic kinks in our relationships might be coming up now for review? In my own case, I have some OCD issues around liking things “just so.” For example, one of my past lovers nicknamed me “Sheldon” after the OCD/Asperger’s syndrome character in the TV show The Big Bang Theory, who needed to be on “his side” of the couch or bed to be comfortable, not to mention that cleanliness comes before erotic play always.

One way that I’ve adjusted to these tendencies in my personality, reflected in my Venus/Mars conjunction in fussy Virgo in the 7th house of committed partnership, is to fortunately manifest partners who also have some personal planets in finicky Virgo. This allows us to be more in sync in terms of our idiosyncrasies, or at least to be accepting and forgiving of each other’s foibles. I could go on and list some of my other peculiarities, but you get the idea:).

If you’re interested in exploring how you and your partner can play well together (kinks and quirks included), as well as what areas could use a little more sharing of preferences through more open, honest communication, you might want to consider some psychic couple’s counseling. This can also include working with your astrology charts to foster more skillful means of relating and thus enhance your compatibility. For more details:

Psychic Counseling Astrological Services

Accordingly, this Venus/Uranus RX period is an excellent time to reevaluate our quirks. We may want to work on not needing some of them so much anymore, especially if they’re getting in the way of having a deeper, more emotionally intimate, committed partnership. On the other hand, we may want to more consciously embrace and accept our idiosyncrasies as distinctive facets of our personality predisposition in this incarnation.

Letting go of some of our kinks may be much easier said than done. This is especially so when we’re dealing with our predilections in the erotic area, as some of our karmic kinks may be so deeply ingrained that they’ve become habitual default patterns of identity. And while they’re not essential parts of our Being on the soul level, what turns us on and off sexually can feel pretty hard-wired in terms of the “X- factor” or primal chemistry in our attraction or aversion with others.

For some of us, perhaps the best use of this Venus/Uranus retrograde cycle may be to consciously accept our predilections as a package deal and let go of any judgement. But rather, to work on loving ourselves and significant others just the way we are.

However, if you’ve found that some of your habitual preferences in the romantic/erotic area have inhibited you from finding fulfillment, it may be time to explore the karmic roots of these deep-seated inclinations to help you cultivate a better understanding of why you are the way you are, along with the forgiveness and acceptance that comes from this.

And perhaps, with this awareness, you’ll be ready to learn some spiritual techniques and practices to help develop the capacity to release or at least loosen your attachment to some of these behaviors that no longer serve you in terms of your soul assignment for this incarnation. For more:

Soul Readings Psychic Therapy

Next, if you’re ready to upgrade and refine your heart’s desire, here’s the Venus RX prescription:

1. REVIEW everything that has given meaning and value to your life to see whether these Venusian preferences will continue to feed your Soul as you move forward. This includes: Your relationship with money, resources and “stuff,” the foods, clothes and material things you crave, your taste for beauty through your aesthetic sensibility and enjoyment of the arts. And, of course, ALL your personal relationships.

2. RE-EVALUATE. Ask yourself: Does what I desire still “do it” for me in terms of giving me more self-worth and self-esteem? Or, am I stuck in a rut of sabotaging behaviors and relationships that no longer nurture or enhance my life-force energies?

3. RECONFIGURE. From October 5, when Venus stations direct and moves into her direct shadow, which lasts until December 17, it’s an auspicious time to consciously choose new upgraded Venus preferences to begin investing your heart energies in. Ones that truly fuel your soul’s highest aspirations and bring joy in Being—rather than just fleeting pleasure.

In addition, a classic interpretation of Venus RX is that old lovers may reappear (at the very least in our dreams:)), to test our resolve to grow and expand rather than stay stuck or fall backwards into regressive patterns we may have outgrown.

AND, YES, WE WILL ALL BE TESTED DURING THIS PERIOD by our inner “ghosts” or by our shadows projected outward onto our relationship with Life. If we want to move to higher ground and transform our relationship patterns, we need to choose to PASS on what is presented—especially literal lovers past or the same dynamic in a different disguise.

These tests may also take the form of a potential relapse into addictive behavior to “sick excitement” in the romance area. So, beware and be AWARE—as any lessons here, once we know our behavior is regressive—can leave an aftertaste of aversion . . . at the very least.

Here’s a synopsis of my personal channeled guidance for healing karmic relationships:

I. Forgiving ourselves and others for our karmic kinks—past and present—and accepting our imperfect humanness helps to discharge destructive emotions from the body.

II. Having gratitude for gifts received and lessons learned regardless of the price paid dissolves self-pity, regret and anger.

III. Sending blessings to all those we have ever loved, no matter the heartbreak, allows us to continue on our journey with open-hearted acceleration.

In closing, here’s a Dzogchen take on enjoying our senses:

“Tantra doesn’t exclude hedonism, but neither does it encourage it. It is very much the ‘middle way’ that characterizes all Buddhist vehicles.

Tantra is not concerned with seeking extremes–even though extreme sensation can be cultivated as a powerful aspect of the path. Fundamentally, Tantra neither seeks extremity nor avoids it. The intrinsic power of any sensation becomes manifest through our realization of its empty nature.”

Ngakpa Chögyam

For more on Tantra with 112 Tantric practices for 112 different personality types:

Spiritual Practices Reading List

And last but not least, here’s my personal criterion for maintaining healthy boundaries in all my relationships:

I. What you choose to do with your life is your karmic business . . . and what I do with my life is mine.

II. What you choose to believe in creates your dream (aka personal reality) . . . just as my beliefs create mine.

III. I don’t have to allow anyone else’s dream of suffering (of which there are infinite levels) affect my dream of joy in Being—right here and right now.

IV. I only allow others into my dream if I enjoy the way we play together and the sides of my nature they bring out in me. YAY!

Wishing us all a Fall season of deeper appreciation and enjoyment of those karmic kinks that help make us uniquely ourselves, as well as a willingness to let go of those parts of our “costumes of identity” that we know we have outgrown and which no longer serve our highest good,

J O A N

“Trust and respect are the emptiness and form of romance. This means that you must listen to each other with open minds and open hearts. You both need to feel valued and appreciated by each other—even for your perceived foibles and weaknesses. Foibles and weaknesses must become endearing. Having chosen each other you can now only celebrate every aspect of each other. The only way forward, for any couple, is to find more and more to love and cherish within each other.” Ngakpa Chögyam

For more: The Wisdom of Dzogchen