…thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself…leviticus 19:18

If we look at this, as it is worded in the fourth of the Reiki Principles, it appears to be fairly straightforward. It is pretty obvious to us that one of the most important things in this world is to love and respect others, show compassion and tolerance, patience and understanding etc. We also know that we must be kind to EVERY living being and this would of course include animals, insects, plants etc., etc.

The original wording of the principle as stated by Dr. Usui is slightly different, but the message is more easily understood with the above paraphrase which I prefer using in my Reiki classes and in my own daily meditation practice.

And the profoundness of the principle, if we truly think about it, opens the door to an entirely new way of perceiving the ups and downs of our lives, of relating to instances where we feel we have been wronged by someone, or taken advantage of, even purposely hurt or embarrassed, or injured in any way. Of relating to the different people who come into our lives and the way we accept and embrace all that is sent our way by God and the Universe.

In addition, if we add just two small words to the above principle, it changes the impact and intent even more deeply. Just for Today I will Love and Respect Every Living Creature…INCLUDING MYSELF!! If we do not truly love ourselves, how can we possibly love and respect our neighbor??

I will try and give insights into the following two questions we must try to answer:
1. can we truly love and respect others if we don’t do the same for ourselves
2. Can we truly be expected to love and respect EVERYone??

Before going any further into the idea of loving even those who we perceive as causing us pain or wishing us ill, let us, just for a moment, think about our relationship with ourselves. Do you love yourself? Are you proud of yourself? Do you respect yourself? Do you take yourself for granted? Do you put yourself down? Do you say unkind things about yourself ? Just for the next week, in addition to saying this principle each day with your daily prayers, meditation or whatever your regular practice is, try delving a little deeper into it. Pay attention during the day to the thoughts that you have regarding the things you do. Check the impulse to criticize yourself, or be compassionate with yourself. Note how you feel when you make a wrong decision, or get lost on the highway, or break a dish you are washing, or burn the supper, or simply forget to do something important. What feelings do you have, what words fill your head at the moment (stupid, clumsy, thoughtless, lazy). What sensations do you feel physically in your body? Where? Are you automatically hard on yourself, or, perhaps, compassionate and understanding. Think about this for a week, and I think you will be quite surprised at what you find. Many of us cannot even say out loud “I love myself”, “I think I am great”, “I am perfect just as I am”, etc., but even those of us who CAN say these things and truly mean them, are still too often overly critical of ourselves.

I would even think to perhaps state the principle in a little different way. Instead of “Just for today I will love and respect every living creature…(including myself)”…How about: “Just for today I will love and respect myself in the same way I imagine I love and respect every other living creature” . Said in that way, it might make it easier for us to realize how much more compassionate we can be with others, how much more tolerant and understanding, how much more patient and loving, than we tend to be with ourselves.

Like a caring mother
Holding and guarding the life
Of her only child,
So with a boundless heart
Hold yourself…. And all beings
…Buddha

“We might quite readily offer such care to others, but we can learn to offer this same kind of gentle attention to ourselves. With the tenderness we might bring to stroking the cheek of a sleeping child, we can softly place a hand on our own cheek or heart. We can comfort ourselves with words of kindness and understanding. “ Radical Acceptance”, Tara Brach, PhD.

For once again, if we do not GENUINELY love and respect ourselves, our pretense at loving and respecting every living creature is just that…pretense… Self love is the first step in truly loving our fellow creatures. And when we love and respect ourselves, everything and anything that happens to us, can be dealt with in a healthy way.

Only when we come to terms with our own shortcomings and learn to accept ourselves exactly as we are, to extend unconditional love to the beautiful person we are, to be compassionate with ourselves even when we are not all we expected of ourselves, to love and respect ourselves and recognize the beauty of our soul within…to feel worthy and deserving and freely offer praise and genuine respect to ourselves…only when we cherish our own being, no matter where we may find ourselves at a particular moment, or stage in our lives, only when we offer ourselves encouragement and love at each step along the way and appreciate our accomplishments-no matter how small, only when we stop taking ourselves and our own needs and wants for granted and understand that we are just as worthy and deserving as everyone else…only when we truly love and respect ourselves can we begin to truly love the next person.

Many people will say “I don’t expect anything from the next person (my children, my spouse, my co-workers, etc.) that I don’t expect from myself.” Well, perhaps we are much too hard on ourselves! Others find it easy to extend loving-kindness, compassion, patience, tolerance, understanding, forgiveness and encouragement to others, while they dole out to themselves judgment, blame, anger, belittling words, harsh accusations, lack of forgiveness, etc.

But it is only when we can find the way to love ourselves unconditionally that we can truly understand the words:

…thou shalt love thy neighbor as thyself…leviticus 19:18

The idea has obviously been around for a long time and is not a new concept developed by Dr. Usui… The Great Hebrew Sage Rabbi Akiva said “This is the most important point in the Torah…the rest is just commentary”.

The idea of loving the next person as we love ourselves becomes very easy as we simply extend the same gracious and loving attention to everyone that we do to ourselves.

And that will bring us to the second part of this discussion…loving and respecting EVERY living creature:

Let us look at this idea of loving and respecting EVERYone …. This would seem almost impossible when we think of some of the strange, difficult, inconsiderate, spiteful and even abusive people who we meet in our lifetime. But there is a profound lesson in extending understanding, forgiveness (see the post re: forgiveness http://mindfulnessjournal.blogspot.com/#114276020321161827 ….) compassion , patience and tolerance to those who truly wish us ill. It brings us once again in contact with the idea of FAITH…faith that God is sending these people into our lives for a loving purpose…no matter difficult that may be for us to see.

We must learn to Cherish those we dislike, even those we perceive as enemies, for they are gifts from God and we must be thankful for this blessing and pray for the wisdom to learn the lesson these people have been sent to teach us

We draw to us those who will help us learn about ourselves. Each time we are presented with a challenge dealing with another, we are really being presented with an opportunity to look inside ourselves to see what about us it is that needs working on, so that we may grow.

The idea of loving each and every person, no matter what, is quite difficult, almost impossible, but I present the idea to you for further thought and consideration, together with the following collection of quotes and insights:

In the practice of tolerance, one's enemy is the best teacher.
HH Dalai Lama

Every person sent to us is a blessing meant to teach us a lesson we need to learn.

Everything that irritates us about others
Can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.
Carl Jung (1875-1961),
Psychologist ~

I have learned silence from the talkative,
tolerance from the intolerant
and kindness from the unkind.
I should not be ungrateful to those teachers.
Kahlil Gibran ~

Nothing can hurt you
unless you give it the power to do so
A Course in Miracles ~~
The main teachers of patience are our enemies.
HH Dalai Lama

Author's Bio: 

I have been a Reiki practitioner and instructor as well as holistic counselor for 10 years, after receiving my Masters Degree from a Traditional Japanese Reiki Master in India. I still spend part of each year in further practice and studies in India. I received further attunements from other International Reiki Masters as well. I run a successful private Center in Raanana, Israel where I work with clients using Reiki as well as a wide variety of other healing modalities,(bach flower Remedies, crystals, chakra balancing through color and sound, channeling through the use of various Tarot cards, QT, massage) run workshops in all levels of Reiki, as well as yoga, meditation, pranayama. I have a background in counseling with over 30 years of experience in family counseling, lactation consultation and childbirth education and have a particular rapport with women and helping to guide them through their life journey.
My Center provides an open, safe, supportive and interactive environment in which to embark on your healing journey. The healing sessions offered facilitate awareness and integration of the Mind/Body/Heart/Spirit connection. The results can be life-changing and transformative helping you with:
• Reducing stress and anxiety
Making successful life transitions
• Discovering your life's purpose and work
• Changing addictive patterns and behaviors
• Dealing with grief and loss
• Facing chronic or terminal illness
• Healing relationships
• Connecting to your higher self
• Working with your guides and angels, and Spirit
A variety of healing energies and techniques are used to stimulate powerful yet gentle healing at the physical, emotional, mental and spiritual levels. This allows the creative process of self-discovery to unfold, while encouraging and empowering you to find your own answers within. Methods are chosen to suit your individual needs based on your unique purpose, readiness and individual preference
If you are simply seeking help in reducing stress in these most difficult times we live in, or seeking more intensive energy work in order to release various deep-seated blockages (fear, worry, anger, jealousy, etc.) which prevent healing, both physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually, all can be addressed according to need and readiness.

You will also be taught techniques which, in most instances, will allow you to continue the processes at home and over a short time learn to help yourself heal and remain healthy, with only occasional future visits for “tune-ups”.

Healing is an active process by which you take responsibility, vs. “curing”, which is passive and places responsibility on the therapist/doctor and on medication.
A session can act as a simple release from tension, anxiety and stress and leave you with a feeling of deep relaxation and renewal of energies. Or it can treat a specific chronic or acute physical ailment by healing it from the source which, in many cases is emotional or mental in origin and is simply manifested via physical symptoms.

You can also choose to learn Reiki yourself in a short, fun and experiential workshop. What better way to to give you and your family the wonderful gift of Reiki so that you can lovingly care for each other in the comfort of your own home.
You can learn more about me and my work, as well as more about the wonders of Reiki, Mindfulness, Channeling etc. on my blog: http://mindfulnessjournal.wordpress.com

or by contacting me via e-mail: janetrip2001@yahoo.com or by phone: 972-54-5572300

You might also be interested in some my other blogs:
http://janesindiajournals.wordpress.com
http://indiajournal2006.blogspot.com