Sadly, today many people are so busy trying to fit themselves into the image of other people that they no longer recognise what is special about them. This ranges from dismantling their natural physical appearance to changing their dressing mannerism right to embodying extreme character imitations.

Although I understand the underlying feelings of insecurity that can trigger such actions, still it goes without saying that this 'unhealthy' habit can be detrimental to our one big asset: recognizing and developing our individual uniqueness.

Some people are either afraid of showing who they really are, because they believe that other people are better than them. Or as a result of lack of inner consciousness, they are just not aware of their own special gifts.

First of all, there is nothing wrong with being yourself. In fact, the more you are willing to be yourself, the better is your chance of being authentic and special. Then no amount of any artistic imitations will ever make a strong, indelible impact on other people or make you feel better about yourself. It is better to be a first class 'you' than a third rate imitation of some celebrity. At least this way, you will be upholding the true spirit of individualism and helping along the course of evolution.

Secondly, regardless of how or what you may at present think of yourself, you are still special and that is what other people want to see and experience in you. Psychologically and emotionally, people are more attracted to someone who is authentic. So don't try to be what you are not. As a spiritual being you came into this world with exactly the special gifts that are right for your own inner growth and need to be developed.

Lastly but not least, the human entity, the spirit spark within each person cannot be dompted or suppressed, because of its high origin. This means that your individual self will continue to cry out to be recognised until you heed its calling.

If you are still in doubt about what is special about you, start by asking yourself these 3 questions:

1. Am I aware of how people react to me when I am with them?

2. When in a crowd, am l more interested in voicing my opinion or do I listen intently to others?

3. When decisions are made, do I simply go along with the opinions of the majority, or is upholding my values more important to me?
Each of these questions can prompt you to look deeper into yourself and recognise what you may be missing, such as what your innate gifts are and how to bring forth your uniqueness.

Your ultimate strength lies in your inherent abilities. For these are the gifts of the spirit, the real you.

Sometimes after delving within, you may find that recognising your own unique strengths and what makes you special have been suppressed. This shouldn't discourage you from continuing to work on them. Because the more you embrace what is unique about yourself, the happier you will become.

The best way to do this is to focus on what comes naturally to you and imbues you with joy.

I once had to give a friend some new perspectives about herself. She complained constantly about how people around her were thriving while she felt left behind. One day as I listened again to her lamentations, it suddenly dawned on me that she had been focusing on other peoples' lives instead of on her own.

I pointed this out to her and encouraged her to look into herself and her life. She was to find out what she could genuinely admire about herself and recognise as her inherent strength.

Well, it didn't take her long to turn the table. She decided that her life hadn't been such "a disaster" after all. In fact she came up with what made her to be such a great friend to have around. Her exceptional ability to remain calm and compose in the face of difficult situation is truly remarkable.

Once you know what it is that makes you special, keep grooming it until it shines out in all its glory. Thus the saying "who you are speaks so loudly I can't hear what you're saying" becomes your true shield and emblem.

It is important to continue to improve on your special strength. Because you never know when you might be call to duty. Remember that no man or woman is an island. We are all here to make a contribution. It is time we stopped quantifying and comparing what others do or don't do. For no one really knows the path of another soul on its wanderings.

Author's Bio: 

Olakunbi (Kunbi) Korostensky N.D. /MA, Energy Psychologist is a Spiritual Life Changer Coach™ specialised in helping people struggling with new changes in their lives. She is also a spiritual teacher for women who want to attain feminine excellence in their lives and businesses through their intrinsic spiritual power. She is the founder of the Awaken Women International, a community providing women world wide with spiritual tools to expand their scope and attain feminine excellence. As Presi-dent of "Stiftung Attitudinal Healing" a non profit organisation founded by her in Switzerland, she is dedicated to embracing love instead of fear. www.embracingchanges.com and www.awakenwomen.com