Really smart people can draw accurate conclusions, right? In fact, as we go through high school and enter the work force or perhaps continue onto college we are taught that having strong opinions and being able to draw quick conclusions is the mark of intelligence.
Someone asks you, “What do you think about global warming?” and you have an opinion, right? “Which do you think is better, Apple or Android?” If you have a pulse you most definitely have a (strong) opinion on this one, don’t you?
You have taken in all the data (or at least the data that you felt was valuable and relevant at the time), drawn conclusions from this data and have now formed your opinion.
What if what we have been conditioned to do since childhood was wrong? What if having an opinion is often incorrect?
What? Don’t have an opinion? What kind of a weak, riding-the-fence, spineless jelly-fish way of living is that?
See what you probably just did there? You concluded, didn’t you? Instead of asking some more questions you concluded that anyone without an opinion is spineless. Is it possible that perhaps this is a mark of someone that has a much deeper and higher awareness or consciousness?
There are two things that happen simultaneously when we conclude and pass judgement:
Number One: We make a decision which means we no longer need to ask questions. When we conclude or decide that means we are closing off all other options. We are choosing to stop asking additional questions and to learn more about all the circumstances surrounding this area.
Imagine walking down a hallway and there are five doors on the left, five doors on the right and one door at the very end. You conclude that the one you want is the door at the very end so you walk down the hall, passing the other ten doors and open the one.
Instead, what if you entered the hallway and asked, “What other doors could be interesting to open?” or “What are some really cool things I could find behind one of these doors?” or even “I wonder if someone I know or would like to know is just on the other side of one of these doors?”
Number Two: We have decided that with our newly-formed opinion we will likely need to align and agree or resist and react to other people’s opinions based on whether they agree or disagree (they better not) with our opinions/conclusions.
Example: Ever actually listen to one of those silly discussions (more like arguments) that people have about whether their iPhone or Android is better? Someone has concluded that iPhone is better (judgement) and now they need to resist and react to everyone else who doesn’t share that same opinion. Or, they get to align and agree with all the people who also think Apple is better.
At the end of the day people believe they are more intelligent if they can “successfully” defend or argue their case. Instead, why don’t we consider a much different way of thinking about all of this?
Let’s consider asking (a lot) more questions before we conclude anything and simply looking at someone as having an interesting point of view.
By asking questions we allow ourselves to open up more and more possibilities. By constantly asking questions we continue to learn more ways to look at a situation and we are able to keep from concluding for longer. The longer we can keep ourselves from drawing conclusions (making judgements) the deeper and wider or point of view becomes.
Just when you are ready to draw that conclusion which shows the world that you have an opinion worth sharing...wait. Don’t share it, yet. Instead, ask two or three or ten more questions to get a much deeper and broader understanding. The ability to conclude and pass judgement is NOT the mark of genius. The ability to ask more questions, beyond what everyone else in the room is willing, is true intelligence in my book.
Plus, if you decide that all those opinions that are out there...and they are EVERYWHERE...are just interesting points of view you will save immeasurable amounts of energy and time for truly important areas of your life.
So, when you hear someone say, “I think our President is stupid” or “My Android phone is better” or “Global warming isn’t real” or “You need to buy American” or “I think boxing is fixed” do you feel the need to align and agree or resist and react to any of these statements?
Or, can you simply smile and say, “That’s an interesting point of view” and then ask some more questions.
I am sure you will find that not only does this help you to manage your energy and keep you from passing judgment; but, it will also cause the person or group to need to really think through their own opinions as you ask more questions.
So, now that you’ve read this, “What else is possible?”
Dallas Hardcastle founded IntoGreat Training Technologies so that he could help people accurately identify their greatest strengths and passions so they can use them to create an explosive business with an extraordinary life. He knows that separating ourselves from what we love and what we do never really works. It’s only when we can blur the line between our work and our lives that we ultimately live an amazing life of our wildest dreams. If this sounds useful to you feel free to go to www.dallashardcastle.com to download a free .pdf map to help guide you right now.