Deserving is an interesting concept. For some it is seen as a right and something positive. Others view it as a negative and feel guilt. When you think about deserving what are some of the thoughts you have? Do you deserve to carve out the time to grow your business? Do you deserve success?
Deserving and feeling worthy go hand in hand. They are partners. Many times people are unable to achieve long lasting success because they do not feel they earned the right. Yes! That is right. Deserving something like success can be viewed as a right.
Typically when something is a “right” then there are rules and restrictions in reference to it. As much as people claim they love their freedom, we also tend to be creatures of habit. We create beliefs and rules. Beliefs and rules can be comforting. They help to make sense of the world. You know what to expect.
There are two types of rules. One set of rules is for when you are going to do something. It is based upon allowing or giving permission. For example, at the end of the day you deserve to sit down and relax. Another set of rules is when you will not do something. This is a restriction. You will not hire an assistant to help because you feel you ought to be doing it all yourself.
When deserving, worthiness and rights are based upon negative rules, you are living life from a restrictive place. Your perception, beliefs and thoughts all focus on restriction and what you cannot do. This can be extremely stressful because the focus is to avoid breaking a rule.
On the other hand, you have the ability to reframe anything you want. Just because you have always done things a certain way does not mean you cannot change. It is so much easier to move toward a goal or challenge than it is to avoid a problem. This is similar to having an offensive or defensive way of approaching your business.
Change is necessary if you want your business to be successful. Consider replacing the word “deserving” with “choice.” When you have a choice you become empowered. The restrictions are lifted. Having a choice creates infinite possibilities. Having a choice is expansive.
When you choose to do something, you become empowered. The limitations, restrictive rules and fears are eliminated. You do not need to have approval from others when you choose your focus and priorities. You are taking responsibility for yourself and your actions.
Choice allows you to freely build you business based upon being of service to others. With choice you also create the opportunity to set boundaries and take care of yourself. Look at how you are operating your practice. Consider which changes might need to happen in order to build your business based upon a healthy, functional dynamic. Choose how you want to set the tone for your practice.
Create boundaries, self care and stepping up to opportunities for growth. Choose to do what you know works. Listen to what resonates within you. Choose to find a way to bring what you’re dreams are into your business.
Having a healthy approach to business will free up your energy as you take the steps to grow your practice. Imagine how this would change the way you do business. Envision how a potential client might become more attracted to you because you are operating your business from a place of service based upon a model of self care, clear boundaries and healthy modeling. That sounds very client attractive.
Take your practice in the direction of your dreams. Decide what you choose to change. Practice the technique of Appreciative Inquiry. This approach is based on positive change, focusing on recognition and appreciation. You focus on what you and your business are doing well, strengths, successes, values and goals. Consider these two main questions: 1) What is going well and 2) What do you want more of? When you explore the options from this perspective, you are focusing on positive change and choosing a strengths based approach to grow your business with confidence.
Activity: Begin to explore the rules or restrictions you have in reference to deserving. Brainstorm. List everything which comes to mind. As you do so you will begin to peel away the layers and expose the underlying beliefs. These core underlying beliefs contribute to your perception about what you deserve, what you feel worthy of and what your “rights” include.
Loren is the sole practitioner with Mindset for Marketing Success. Loren has devoted her life to helping people master the mindset for success to grow their business. She uses a laser like approach to identify and transform core issues that get in the way of stepping into your greatness. You will experience quick and effective change.