"Connie" (not her real name) arrived feeling upset for her session. She had just read an article about a successful Home Birth after a difficult labor thanks to EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques).
She too had wanted to have a Home Birth when her eldest son was born 22 years ago and ended up with a cesarean. She "was over it" but had been disappointed and wished she had known EFT back then so she could have had a Home Birth, like the woman in the article.
I asked her to "tell me the story" about the delivery, and to stop as soon as she felt any intensity. Actually, there were two stories: 1) "The doctor and the due date"; and 2) "The caesarean". We started with the first one.
Connie had been seeing a Naturopathic doctor who would deliver the baby, and had agreed to a home birth. Connie had very irregular cycles and she and the doctor had not agreed on the date of conception or on the due date. The doctor insisted that a woman could not know when she had conceived, they had to set the date with a chart starting with her last period. Connie insisted she knew exactly when she had gotten pregnant, and the dates didn't coincide with what the doctor said. Connie found out she was NOT over it! Even though the doctor discounted my intuition about the baby's due date... Even though I'm angry at that doctor for insisting he knew better than I did when I had gotten pregnant... Even though I had to be nice and submissive because he was in authority... Even though I would like to swak him one for being so insensitive and not believing me...
Even though he said it was impossible to know when I had gotten pregnant, and I did know... We did several rounds of tapping until her intensity dropped to 0. Connie had a very happy, uneventful pregnancy. She was blissful and could remember thinking that pregnancy was the best state ever. Her doctor kept insisting on the "official" due date, and she kept insisting that it would really be two weeks later, because she really did know when she had gotten pregnant. So it was a terrible surprise when her doctor called one evening and told her he was leaving on vacation three days later. In his mind, she was overdue, and he had scheduled his vacations because none of his patients had delivery dates for the next two weeks. If she didn't have the baby in the next three days, she would have to look for another doctor to deliver her. Even if I was frozen and couldn't process what he was saying... Even if I still can't believe he would do that to me... Even if I was scared out of my wits... She went into labor right then and there, and her husband called the doctor back to let him know.
Even if I started having contractions out of fear... Even if I was terrified of the doctor's leaving on vacation and having to find a new doctor... Even if I was afraid of doing it all on my own... The doctor said to call him again when contractions were 2 minutes apart; but her contractions stayed erratic. Even if I had erratic contractions and was scared of the doctor's going on vacation... Even if I felt I had to be "good" and have this baby so he (the doctor) wouldn't abandon me... After 24 hours of irregular contractions and no dilation, the doctor suggested inducing labor. Even though I knew I had to birth this baby before the doctor left, and time was running out... Even though I wanted a home birth and was being sent to the hospital for an induction... Connie remembers walking up and down the corridor with the IV... and still no dilation. She was then told that her baby was having fetal distress and she needed a cesarean.
Even though I was afraid my baby would die because of the fetal distress... Even though I was scared in the operating room... Even though I was angry because they tied my hands down and I couldn't move them... Even if I felt betrayed by my body because it hadn't dilated... Even if I felt inadequate as a woman, because I couldn't birth my baby normally... And then, the baby was born; they untied her hands and let her hold him and see that he was beautiful and perfect! Even though I didn't have a Home Birth, I was so happy to have a healthy, normal baby. Connie told me she felt like a weight had lifted from her shoulders. She had avoided talking about the subject of her son's birth, or would make jokes. We can't change what happened; she told me that a year later the doctor had apologized and had acknowledged that many women do truly know when they got pregnant. He now pays more attention to what women tell him. She could talk about the doctor with no emotional intensity.
Patzia Gonzalez-Baz, B. Sc. Clinical Member, OSP; D-CEP; EFT-Adv; has a Psychotherapy practice in Newmarket, ON and facilitates EFT and TAT sessions in person and on teleconferences.
Patzia specializes in empowering individuals by helping them release their blocks and inhibitions, followed by facilitating positive belief patterns, that allows the individual to step into their own power and bring back their sense of aliveness. Patzia also integrates spiritual awareness and healing, along with many other approaches in her practice, matching the therapy to the individual needs of the client. For more information visit Patzia's website at: http://www.HealingHeartsCentre.com