Are You Just Like Him?

Bruce (not his real name) is a man that was once at the top of the corporate world for 13 years. Two years ago, he was given a layoff package as part of the company's down sizing scheme. Bruce is the proud father of a precocious 8 year old girl and an inquisitive 6 year old boy. He is the loving husband of his beautiful wife Susan (not her real name). They have a large house in the burbs and on the surface everything looks "normal".

What you do not see is that Bruce has lost himself. He does not know how to handle all the dramatic changes occurring in his life. He's one drink away from being an alcoholic and one wrong decision away from Susan taking the kids and walking out on him.

Like most men, Bruce identified so much of who he was with what he did. When that left so did a big part of who he was. About the same time Bruce was given the axe, Susan was recruited by a friend in a popular multi-level marketing business. The original thought was that it be fun to help out the family and make a few extra dollars. However, Susan realized she had a gift for business and ran with it. In just two short years she became one of the top producers in the country.

Sounds like a dream come true for Susan and Bruce is a huge supporter of her...sort of. You see Bruce can't stand the fact that Susan is kicking his ass financially. Sure it's for the family, but he feels there's a contest going on and he's being schooled. Ego any one?

Sadly, Bruce could not find another job at the pay level he was use to and anything less seemed so demeaning. The package was a good one so there was no real pressure to get our there and hustle. However, as he watched Susan blossom in her new role, he could not help but feel resentful. His self esteem began to nose dive, his social network all but vanished on him and his days were filled with tending to the kids while Susan's ever increasing responsibilities kept her on the go.

Susan's world was all about uplines, downlines, conference calls and seminars. She was being groomed to be a top trainer for the organization too. She loved the power, energy and fruits of her labours. Her social calendar could be full if she chose it. She never lost site of her role as a Mom and a wife and did what it took to balance what was important to her. Sounds like a story about women of power and the lazy-ass men they attract doesn't it?

Well this story is not going in that direction. This is about a man that is not unlike millions of men around the planet the are dealing with the same pain, insecurity, emasculation and confusion.

What we have here is indeed a serious situation. However, most of our pop culture solutions are failing miserably, leaving guys like Bruce in relationship quicksand. If Bruce and Susan continue on their current path Bruce will loose it all. Bruce does not have the luxury of waiting around for things to change. Every day he is a victim, is a day Susan continues to be in her ever increasing masculine energy. Yes, she's successful and has it all going in her direction, but she longs for her champion to sweep her off her feet and "take her". She longs to surrender control and be feminine, nurturing and loving to her man.

If Bruce does not "Man Up" soon...Susan's world will fill with options that match her energy... possibly with a man that will.

So what's going to save our boy Bruce? How's he going to get back his power (let's be clear...no one took it from him) and reclaim his authentic masculine power?

How does he do that?

1) Be First: By being bold and forth coming about dropping the ball in his life and taking full responsibility for where he is emotionally, mentally, financially and spiritually. He's got to own his stuff without blame. So many guys are waiting for their girls to make it all right for them. Stop it! If you want lasting change step up and be the guy that makes it right first. The way the feminine is wired...you will get tenfold in return.

2) Have a plan: He has to have a plan for getting to where he wants to go. He's got to map out the steps to rebuild his life. The strange thing is; women are as attracted to a guy with vision and passion for what they want as much as if he already has it. A man with a plan is down right sexy to her. She will attach her star to a man of purpose. She will be his biggest fan and help cheer him on to make it happen.

3) Take control, be decisive: Our boy Bruce needs to tell Susan that in no uncertain terms that he is taking her out Friday night. She's to wear her little black dress and be ready by 7PM. He has the sitter arranged and all the details are covered. This can not be a one shot deal of taking control either. She can smell deception a mile away. He must not back down when she "tests" him (and she will). By continuing to take control where a man should his charisma grows and she can feel it as being authentic. This helps her to surrender and move to her feminine faster than anything else a man can do.

Obviously, I have brushed a very wide stroke on this very real issue. By using these steps as a starter, Bruce is on his way to reclaiming his authentic masculine power and Susan gets to feel her feminine energy again. Where she longs to be. There's hope for Bruce and his marriage.

Sadly, many men will never get this message and will be separated or divorced within the next few weeks or months. They'll scratch their heads and wonder what went wrong?

It does not have to go down like that. Be a Remarkable Man and be first for her. Most of all.. be first for you.

The Remarkable Man Project is here to challenge, support and inspire you to be The Remarkable Man you know you can be.

Remember: You are not alone on the journey brother...I've got your back!