Transforming an "I Can't" Attitude Into an "I Can" Approach

Every man has three characters: that which he shows, that which he has, and that which he thinks he has. Alphonse Karr

How often have you been unable to make progress on a specific issue? You feel stuck. You are aware of the problem. You even know what you ought to be doing to make a difference, but for whatever reason, the change is difficult.

Over time, you are likely to feel that you cannot change and remaining with this issue is inevitable. You just feel like you can't do it. No matter what you do, nothing will ever change.

I have witnessed this internal struggle with clients throughout my career. For some people no matter how hard they try, they are not able to make long lasting change on their own. They hold onto hope by looking for external solutions. How much money have you spent, hoping the next information product will work? The amount of time and money invested can end up being significant.

If this is you, it is time to step out of the box and to stop looking for the obvious solutions. Most likely there are underlying core issues that keep you from making progress. They might be so deeply buried you don't even realize they are there.

If these issues do not get addressed or resolved, you are likely to eventually fall back to an old familiar pattern. The changes you do make are likely to be short term and could eventually be sabotaged.

Traditional systems and approaches primarily focus on thoughts and actions. They do have the ability to work. What these approaches overlook is addressing your energy system. When you have an energetic block about something, no matter how hard you try, you are not going to have long lasting results. EFT aligns your energy to clear the block that keeps you from making long lasting positive change.

All the answers you need are within you. Stop looking outside of yourself for the solution. Begin to look within. Realize what you are capable of changing, a shift will begin to occur. Instead of focusing on what you can't do, look for what you are able to do.
Negative feelings cause a block in the natural flow of energy, also known as qi (pronounce chi). The qi is life power or electrical current. The goal is to always have qi in balance.

When you focus on the negative, the energy flow or qi, in your body changes polarity and the flow will become reversed. It is not something that you can feel happening.

The best way to describe this is thinking of a water hose that has a kink in it.Although the water is turned on, the water cannot get past that kink. The kink blocks the flow of water. Once you release the kink, the water is able to flow freely through the hose. Your energy system has a similar process.

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Set up: Even though I have made many attempts to change, but it doesn't last, I love and accept all parts of myself.

Even though I focus on all my attempts to change and what didn't work, I choose to consider that there might be a solution that I have overlooked.

Even though I have had small successes and then return to my old familiar behavior, I'm willing to consider that the solution has been within me all this time.

Eyebrow: Sometimes I feel that things will never change.
Side of Eye: I have tried to change before and it did not last.
Under Eye: I am aware of what I can't do.
Nose: Even though I don't want to be, I feel pretty negative about things.
Chin: This feeling of being stuck troubles me.
Collarbone: I am focused on what I have not been able to change up until now.
Under Arm: I have made many attempts to change, but they have not lasted.
Head: When I think about what I can't do, it gets me down.

Eyebrow: I choose to focus on what I can do.
Side of Eye: I feel that the solutions might be within me.
Under Eye: But I have always looked to others for the answers.
Nose: I appreciate being aware of what I am doing well.
Chin: When I feel positive, I know that I can change when I am ready to.
Collarbone:I choose to focus on the solution.
Under Arm: I feel hopeful with knowing that I can make a positive change if I choose to.
Head: When I feel positive, I can see the solutions and know the choice is mine to make for change.

When using EFT to address the barriers to change, the outcome might not change but the way you deal with it will change and that is significant. You possess the ability to change how you perceive your issue and the approach you take to resolve it. You have a learned response. You can unlearn the doubts and fears. Change your response. Taking one more step toward reaching your peak potential.

Activity: Think about one issue you have tried to change, but have not seen long lasting results. Think of a time when you were younger where you might have had a similar experience. List two or three thoughts or beliefs you have about that old experience.

Take one of those thoughts / beliefs and tap on it. Continue to tap on that until the level of intensity is down to a zero. When that one is done, then one by one tap on each thought or belief you have about that event. Stick with each aspect until the intensity is zero. Once you have a zero on all of them, return to the original issue you have been trying to change and see if anything has changed.