WakeUpLive.com presents: Raising Great Children

Every parent dreams of raising great children, but raising a great family doesn’t just happen. It evolves from dream, to plan, to action, to accomplishment. It begins with a fuzzy and vague thought. We ponder, think, make notes and talk about it. Slowly, the idea becomes clear and sets our hearts on fire. We plan, act and continue acting, until our dream eventually becomes a reality.

Thirty-six years ago my husband and I dreamed about raising our six children to be great men who would make a positive impact on the world. Our dream evolved out of the depression and grief I experienced after delivering two stillborn baby girls. Before this happened I was an enthusiastic super mom. I fed, clothed, bathed and protected my children. I read them stories, taught them to be neat, kind and obedient. I was rushed, impatient and stressed out. I never had time for myself.

I didn’t look beyond the day-to-day activities and ask myself why I was I doing this until I lost the babies. Then I was depressed. I did what I had to do, but my heart wasn’t in it. I kept asking myself is this all there is to life.

A priest suggested I take time to myself to pray, meditate and ponder on who I was and what I thought my purpose in life was. He suggested I get up a half hour earlier. I agreed to try it for 30 days because I wanted to show him it was a stupid idea. The half-hour grew to an hour, and the 30 days grew into 36 years. Father’s stupid idea is the most precious time of my day.

It was during my early-morning prayer time when I realized being a good mother wasn’t as much about cleaning, cooking and chauffeuring as it was about building character. Stimulating our children’s creativity, courage and conviction was more important then having the perfect house. I decided to spend less time doing for my children and more time teaching them to do for themselves and others; less time talking and more time listening; less time directing and more time dialoguing. We taught them three basic principles: love God, be self-reliant, and accept the responsibilities of your choices.

They were creative, adventurous teenagers. There were times I wondered if they would get through high school alive, let alone be great men. I read my goal daily. It was difficult watching them suffer the consequences of their poor choices. I wanted to step in and rescue them. They made many stupid choices, and many nights I cried myself to sleep. I believe the boys are so successful today because they learned to work and to accept responsibility for their behavior when they were children. They learned to enjoy the rewards of their wise choices and endure the pain of their poor ones. I believe these experiences shaped their characters and molded them into compassionate dynamic men.

We are grateful for our sons. Each started his own business without any help from us. Four are in real estate, one is in antiques and one owns his own cooking school. They have received honors for saving and rehabilitating historical buildings, cleaning up the environment, creating jobs, and building parks and child care centers, playgrounds, art centers and teaching the handicapped. Together they’ve given over $10 million to charity. Most important of all, my daughters-in-law tell me they are wonderful fathers and husbands.

If you have an outrageous dream in your heart, don’t be afraid to nourish it. Pray about it, write about it, and reflect on it. If it’s your mission, the small spark will grow into a raging fire, and in spite of all the obstacles, your dream will eventually come true.

*** This article was republished with permission from the best-selling Wake Up...Live the Life You Love book series. To hear more information on this book and the book series, go to http://wakeupteleclass.com/.