There is an art to owning your space. It is a discipline one needs to practice. Regardless of what you feel and think by watching and listening to speakers at the font of the room and thinking they were born with this natural ability, that isn’t necessarily the truth. In fact, as you know, public speaking is one of the greatest fears even more than death itself. How did they arrive at the natural looking ability.
The Greek word for self-control comes from a root work meaning “to grip” or “take hold of”. Are you willing to get a grip on your life and take hold of what is necessary to enrich you public speaking skills? It requires self discipline and practice. You may not want to do public speaking, however it is required in many careers today. It might be in the form of presenting your ideas to a board and being heard by your team members as one who has things under control.
Go within your self and do some evaluation. On a scale of one to ten where do you stand with the fear? Is it at a ten level? Most people never bring it down to a 0 level as fear or a little stress before speaking is not all bad. What do you need to do to change to lower the fear and give yourself permission to speak. I have created a form for you to follow which is the last page of this article. On the far left of the sheet under NOW rate the fear then on the far right where do you want to be say 30 days from now or 60 days from now. Be realistic and list that number. The long space between are the steps necessary to make the change.
What can you do?
Is there a toastmaster’s group near you? Have you checked out www.asla.com or read Paul Karasik’s book How to Make it Big in the Seminar Business? What actual steps will you take. Do you see yourself as a keynote speaker? Join National Speakers Association as they are so supportive of your change. If the are not readily available to you and your need to work faster as you have a challenge coming sooner, do some of the following.
1. Stand in front of a mirror and watch yourself speak.
2. Practice what it is that you might need to say.
3. Practice with friends and family.
4. When you practice with them, take ownership of the space in front of them.
5. Stand tall with your feet planted about six inches apart. 6. Do not start to speak immediately after you stand. 7.Instead take a deep breath and engage each one with a smile.
8. Start speaking by asking them a question to engage their minds.
9. As you see and feel the connection with them, continue your speech.
10. You will feel nervous but remember get a grip on yourself.
11. Have your friends evaluate you and give you some
good feedback to improve.
In your actual presentation, the feelings will be different and there will be an element of fear. Repeat those wonderful Greek words and learn what to say to that person within to give you permission to move forward.
Remember practice, practice and practice.
I am happy to answer any question that you might have.
My most favorite quote of all is:
“Alone we can do so little, together we can do so much”
Helen Keller.
Remember the practice she had to go through to even speak and let her become your role model.
June Davidson - Founder of Coaching Firm International, Founder of International Education Institute, a non-profit organization dedicated to support young people's education, Director of the Pasadena Chapter of For You Network, and the National Association of Female Executives-Entrepreneurs. She is also currently serving on the Board of Regents for National Heritage Foundation.
June is an internationally recognized trainer, author, certified action coach and one of the most sought after conference speakers. She trains CEOs, Executives and Entrepreneurs to become powerful leaders and effective communicators.
For more than 15 years, June Davidson has specialized in research and training for: Leadership, Certified Seminar Leading, and Certified Coaching. She also teaches courses that offer Continuing Education Units for: PhD Therapists, LCSW, CPA, Attorneys, and Doctors, and teaches on the campus at Fuller Theological Seminary in Pasadena, California.