Were you dumped by your girlfriend/boyfriend? Asked someone out but was turned down? Told someone that you love him/her and the answer was "although you are an interesting person, you're just not the one for me"?
What most people do when they are dumped is that they start to search for a logical explanation or a reason for what happened. Unfortunately this usually leads them to searching for and finding something wrong within themselves and this seriously damages their self-confidence.
Usually, the main reason behind feeling bad after a break-up is lack of self-confidence. After all, if you were sure that you are a great person who doesn't deserve to be dumped, you wouldn't have related rejection to a problem within yourself. Instead, you would've found another explanation for it.
The truth is, in some cases the problem may not really lie with you, but with your partner. Just read further and you will see for yourself.
The following lines will open your eyes to facts that you may not have been aware of before. After you understand them, you will discover that getting dumped may not be that bad at all.
* Love and compensation: The person who dumped you is just a human who is governed by the rules that govern all other humans. One of the main reasons that makes this person fall in love is to compensate for some of his own weaknesses; so if you loved someone who is a methodical thinker, he may dump you if you were very similar to him simply because he may want someone more spontaneous and creative to compensate for his rigid way of thinking. Thus, although you are smart and intelligent, you were still dumped because your partner needs to compensate for his weaknesses and not because you are bad Smiling. If you think that the person you fell in love with is superior then wake up and realize that all humans have unmet needs that they need to compensate for, the only difference is that it may not be that visible for some of them.
* His/Her unconscious criteria: Everyone has subconscious criteria for choosing people he falls in love with This means that if someone didn't match these criteria, the person can never love him even if he was the greatest ever. If one of these criteria was something like "she must be blonde, or he must be tall" and you don't fit that, you might get dumped even though there's really nothing wrong with you!
The conclusion we can make from all of this is that you could get dumped for many reasons that have absolutely nothing to do with you. In some cases you should even feel pity for the other person who is just searching blindly for a way to compensate for his flaws instead of someone who would really be a dedicated and loving partner. Most importantly, be confident and know your own strengths. If you become confident enough, being dumped won't have any effect on you.
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