Once upon a time there was a beautiful princess who was on a diet. She really wanted a spoonful of Hershey's syrup from the can in the refrigerator. But no, that wasn't allowed. So she had some carrot sticks instead. Then some celery. But that didn't satisfy her desire. So she had some more carrots. And then a peanut butter sandwich. And another one. And then she ate the entire can of chocolate syrup.
What's your spoonful of chocolate? Have you been denying yourself something you truly want because you think you shouldn't have it or you're not allowed? Sometimes what looks like self-indulgence is really just a response to a deep yearning. Satisfy it at an early stage and you won't have painful repercussions later on.
Getting what you don't want can help you clarify. When I was in seventh grade I REALLY wanted an ID bracelet. I managed to convince my father to get me one for Easter. I realized quickly afterwards that it wasn't the bracelet itself I wanted. The cute guy I had a crush on needed to have given it to me. I got stuck on the tangible thing and misidentified what was ultimately important.
Refine and adjust. Get as close as you can to identifying your true desire. Separate what's truly essential and what's just nice to have. A while back I got it in my head that I wanted to be married. My beloved of 14 years didn't feel the same. I could have made a big issue of it but instead I distilled what was most important. For me at the time the bottom line was a ring and to be able to call him my husband. I didn't require the rest. This made the goal much more attainable.
Give it to yourself. Don't settle for carrot sticks when you really want Hershey's syrup. And don't eat the whole can when just one spoonful is all you really want. If you get in the habit of identifying and satisfying your deepest desires then true satisfaction becomes a whole lot easier. I never got the right ID bracelet, but I did get the wedding ring and even the license to go with it. I have my spoonful of chocolate and life is sweet.
Liz Sumner, M.A. is a Life Coach who specializes in care of the Self with a capital S. Are you ready to give your Self what you truly want? Try a free 30-minute coaching call. Find out more at www.WonderfulCoach.com.