Some years ago, I had a painful experience of being told in not very nice terms that it was easy for me to be walked all over. This was an answer to a question I had put to my ex as to why he treated me the way that he did.
Over the years, I was haunted by his words. I would remember them with shock and pain that he would say such a thing to me and with a look of glee on his face about it too.
As my self-image was already fragile, his words cut like a knife. They made their way deep into my heart where they buried and festered and produced an even further distorted view of the person I thought I was. Already feeling useless and no good, I now had the words ‘walk over’ to add to my personal list of negative attributes.
Yes, his response revealed a lack of respect for me but when your self-image is already broken, it is not easy to resist and disagree with put-downs from others. In fact, we often end up staying around people that support our negative self-image because we can’t put up a resistance when they are being disrespectful.
That is why hearing the word of God is so vital in healing a negative self-image. Through the Holy Spirit, God will cause us to be aware of beliefs that are contrary to the truth of His word and help us see the value He places on us.
Some of you today have been carrying words in your heart that have wounded your self-image. It could be words spoken to you as a child or something some one has said or done later in life. However, God wants you to see the truth of what He says about you so that you can stop making someone else’s opinion the final authority over who you are.
This is what God has done for me. Almost 15 years after being told I was a walk over, the Lord said to me through Isaiah 51:23-24
….. Your Master, your God, has something to say, your God has taken up his people's case: "Look, I've taken back the drink that sent you reeling. ….I've passed it over to your abusers to drink, those who ordered you, 'Down on the ground so we can walk all over you!' And you had to do it. Flat on the ground, you were the dirt under their feet."
He saw my wound and He healed it. The same God that has done this for me can do it for you too. Ask God today to help you stop allowing others to dictate your worth and value. If you build your worth on who God says you are, the put downs of others will hurt, but not distort your self-image.
If you would like support in achieving your emotional and spiritual healing, contact Joanne today at Love In Season.
Joanne's passion is to help women break the patterns that keep them with men that are not right for them. She enjoys developing course and programs that equip women and young people with the neccessary life skills to solve common relationship issues so that they can build healthy and whole relationships.
She is the published Author of 'He Loves Me Not?' a series of personal short stories with coaching guidance to support single women interested in ending painful dating relationships from a faith perspective. Visit Love In Season.
She also designed and runs The Right Step Relationship Course that coaches women out of unhelpful relational patterns in their dating lives.
Joanne is a qualified Integrative Counsellor and a member of the ACC and BACP and abides by their Code of Ethics (ACC Code of Ethics) (BACP Code of Ethics)
She is a qualified Behavioural Life Skills Coach (Canada) and abides by the LCA code of Ethics. She holds a C&G 7303 Teachers Certificate in Adult Learning as well as being a trained faciliator in Career Development (WorkNet, USA) and Obesity Counselling (National Centre for Eating Disorders). She also has 10 years experience of facilitating various workshops on personal development and career guidance and facilitated lifeskills coaching groups to men and women recovering from alcohol and drug misuse.