Getting to YES In Your Life Finding What Stops Your Success - and Keeping it Out of Your Way!

Life is full of joyful moments; times when success is on our side and everything seems to be going according to plan. But sometimes in life, we find ourselves in an undesirable place. Many of us at one time or another can become stuck or lost – doing things we don't really want to be doing and unable to shift perspective or move direction.
If you are human, you probably checked at least one of these boxes. If not, congratulations! The following information may or many not feel relevant to you at this time. If any of the above thoughts do resonate with you, please read on as we share some of our most important lessons gleaned from working with individuals, teams and leaders over the past two decades helping them to get to YES!

Do any of these things sound familiar?

• I feel frustrated with myself or others
• I feel discontented with the way things are
• I don’t feel motivated about parts of my life (job, relationship, etc.)
• I am not fully enjoying life in the ways that I’d like
• I am caught up in a cycle of habits that are no longer serving me
• I feel like there must be something more, but don’t know where to find it!

Here at the Baraka Institute we are well adept in the process of pattern analysis. From our research and experience, we have synthesized the six most common stopping blocks to success. Below is a summary of our findings and subsequent solutions towards shifting from stuck to success!

The Six Common Stopping Blocks to Success

STOPPING BLOCK #1: LACK OF FOCUS
Indicators:

• You don’t know what you want, although you can easily identify what you don’t want.
• You have some things in place in your life, (e.g. relationships, work, etc.), but nothing really excites you.
• You are not waking up and jumping out of bed each day, ready to embrace all that life has to offer. In fact you might even feel sluggish and slow to arrive while others are buzzing around you.
• You are asking questions of yourself like: “Who am I? What do I really want to do? What would make me happy?”

Solution: You need to FIND YOUR PATH.
Sometimes referred to as one’s life purpose or passion – your path refers to your inner motivation and drive. Regardless of the label, the key to finding your path is to get clear about what matters most to you and to create a passage toward a new, more fulfilled existence. Becoming focused on your preferred future is essentially your first step to success.

STOPPING BLOCK #2: NEGATIVE MINDSET
Indicators:

• You feel negative and self-critical, and you lack a positive approach to life.
• Your attention and focus is on what isn’t working.
• You worry about the consequences and unknowns in your life. At times you feel frustrated with others who seem to have it all together – and you don't know how to make this happen for yourself.

Solution: You need to BELIEVE IN YOUR PATH.
Sometimes that inner doubter gets the best of you. Your brain is filled with an abundance of “mind chatter”, clouding your ability to see the beauty and possibility that your life holds. In moments of uncertainty, it can be difficult to trust in the notion that you are on the right path for you. Trusting in yourself is a big part of the journey toward self-satisfaction and achieving your dream life. Much like a car driving at night, you can only see so far ahead: you must trust that the lights will continue to guide you once you've turned around that corner.

 

STOPPING BLOCK #3: UNFOUNDED FEARS
Indicators:

• You fear anything unknown or unpredictable.
• You may be in the thralls of change, just simply trying to handle whatever curve ball life is throwing your way.
• You don’t know what to expect and you are constantly readying yourself for the worst.

Solution: You need to PREPARE FOR YOUR PATH.
Surfing grey, turbulent waters of chaos and confusion while hoping to find a sunny beach may seem an impossible task. (what exactly are you wanting to convey?The reality is that life is always in motion, and even though we are often just trying to stay afloat, there is always another way to proceed. Perhaps you need to be more strategic and sensitive to the outcomes of your decisions. Do you often feel the need for a plan and a strategy to think through situations and to make the best possible choices? Being prepared and developing a style and thought process that will give you more options may alleviate those fears. (what fears?) As the old adage reminds us: knowledge is power. And the more you are open to this concept, the more confident you will be in taking the right risks to navigate effectively through life. Knowledge of course begins with the way in which you accept and process information.

STOPPING BLOCK #4: LACK OF MOTIVATION – You lack the desire and motivation to take charge.
Indicators:

• Life is moving along and yet you are still sitting in the passenger seat. Someone or something else is driving you.
• You are ready for whatever life brings you, although you don’t take proactive steps to stretch yourself to get what you want.
• You have dreams, desires and wishes – but haven’t acted on them.
• You are still staying you don’t have enough time or money to accomplish what you want.

Solution: You need to PURSUE YOUR OWN PASSIONATE PATH.

Even the best of us sometimes struggle to ask for the support we need. Many of us are too embarrassed to admit we’ve lost our “mojo”; we just keep hiding away, hoping it will come back. Or we jump into other people’s ideas and dreams in the hope that their energy will magically become our own. In the end, when you are driving through life in your own passion, it will sustain. And once you begin, this will be remarkably easy to continue. So step into a passionate place by getting to know who you really are and owning that you matter! Dreams, desires and all!

While many of us are living our most passionate lives, it is not uncommon for our interests to wane. Sometimes we simply haven’t yet found that one thing that really lights us up, or we've lost sight of those “once upon a time” fantasies we once held for ourselves. The only thing in life that is guaranteed is change. At Baraka Institute, we have found that the true key to sustainable passion and engagement in life is finding a process of thinking and processing that works for each individual. While many are stuck merely “surviving”, the FootSteps program invites you to become passionate and engaged in all that you do: to seek your truth and to live out loud, fully expressed.

STOPPING BLOCK #5: EXCUSES
Indicators:

• You know what you want, but keep thinking and saying to yourself and others… “If I only had ___then I could ___.”
• You are slowly realizing what you want in life, but are easily set back.
• You feel that mastering your dreams is an uphill battle.
• You hold many strong beliefs about what is possible and not possible.

Solution: You need to REMOVE THE OBSTACLES FROM YOUR PATH.

The ability to rapidly remove one’s limiting beliefs, especially those that have lingered for years perpetuating self-sabotaging patterns, starts with developing self-awareness. Excuses are merely expressed thoughts; they act as indicators that something isn’t working. However, in order to remove existing obstacles, you must commit the time and energy needed to explore the reasons for the obstacles' existence in the first place. Examining how the obstacle has benefited or served us will reveal what coaches call the “positive intent” of a pattern of habit. Could something be added to this explaining how we would then look at how the obstacle is no longer serving us, if it ever did?

The Whole Person Coaching™ process helps you to recognize your own patterns of excuses (are you saying that excuses are the only patterns?) and the beliefs supporting them.

STOPPING BLOCK #6: SUSTAINABILITY

Indicators:

• You often have a clear plan, yet are easily sidetracked.
• Your well-meant efforts seem to halt at a moment's notice.
• Your priorities are often in conflict.
• You could benefit from more strategic decision-making and sustainable solutions towards reaching goals and living life more fully.
• You are often inconsistent when it comes to your approach to life, changes, and accomplishing what you want (can you clarify? Maybe just choose one of the three. To me they are all different and unrelated)

SOLUTION: You need to STAY ON YOUR PATH.

When we make promises and/or agreements with ourselves without following through, we begin a cycle of letting ourselves down. Over time, this cycle can undermine our ability to trust that we will accomplish the things we want, and can lead to a series of beliefs that support our ineffectiveness. This pattern often shows up in areas like fitness, healthy eating habits and self-care. So how can you change this habit that results in endless lists of “to do’s” that never get done or dreams that are never realized?

Accountability is key in any coaching relationship. Within the FootSteps program, you will have the support of a coaching relationship and, over time, develop your own structure for personal accountability. In the end you will learn and develop these habits for yourself, without the need for a coaching support structure.