The Top 5 Understandings Women Need For Successful Negotiation

Women are learning the value of successful negotiation. However, men initiate negotiation four times more than women. Because of poor or nonexistent negotiation skills, women leave approximately $2000 on the table when buying a car. Women are more pessimistic about the rewards of negotiation than men.

These and similar statistics are reflective of a woman not knowing her worth and having low expectations of her capabilities.

Before you begin the negotiation process and expect success, you need the following top 5 "negotiation" understandings to get what you want.

1. Accept the Right to Negotiate. Make the decision that you are worth protecting. That means stopping people from taking advantage of you. If you don’t see your own value in having the right to win, then rest assured no one else will. You will constantly have an uphill battle.

2. Get Comfortable With Negotiating. Begin to understand that’s how most of the world works – from selling cars to exchanging services. Get rid of any hang-ups you may have such as "I can’t ask for what I want," or "I don’t deserve what I want." Going into any exchange with the attitude that you can and will negotiate for an outcome satisfactory to you is essential in negotiation success. Just ask any teenager!

3. Learn Your Opening. Practice your opening remarks when ready to negotiate: "You need to help me here," or "Let’s talk about making this work for both of us." Plan your work and work your plan. Don’t waste time getting hung up in situations where you aren’t clear, don’t have an agenda (yes, not all agendas are bad), and cannot express yourself adequately.

Another tip is to work at getting the other person to consider alternatives, ones that you propose. Become adept at your persuasion skills.

4. Don’t Take It Personally. Negotiation isn’t about getting the other person to think you are right. It’s about getting the other person to support and help you achieve your goal. Keep your sights on the goal and don’t let your immediate feelings get in the way.

5. Save the Emotions. Consistency is key here. A steady emotional response, positive or negative, is an asset in conditioning people to respond to you. Rely on their need to please. It’s human nature.

All in all, women are no longer content to feel apprehension about negotiation. They are stepping forward with a new expectation of getting in the game and being a player to contend with.