Choosing the Most Important Questions to Ask a Divorce Lawyer

When you make the decision to file for divorce, the first thing you need to do is find a divorce lawyer that meets with your needs. Before you attend the first meeting with the lawyer you need to think of any questions you may want to ask, but do not rely on your memory: write down a list of questions to which you need answers. Do not assume the divorce lawyer will know the questions in your mind when you meet; each client has individual needs, and yours will be different from someone else's. Because each situation is unique, divorce lawyers have no way of knowing what kinds of questions may enter the minds of each client.
There are many questions you may wish to ask, but you also want to give the divorce lawyer and chance to provide you with information first. Prepare your list of questions, but do not ask until your divorce lawyer finishes talking since he or she may answer many of the questions that are already on your mind. Experienced divorce lawyers know the questions to which their clients need answers, so they will more than likely cover the majority of your questions.
It's important to define for yourself what you want to know—do not depend on someone else to tell you the questions you need to ask your divorce lawyer. Some of the questions you may wish to ask include but are not limited to the following:
• What is the fee and how much do you need up front?
• Can my spouse be forced to pay my attorney's fees?
• How long will it take from the time of filing to the final decree?
• What kind of financial information does the divorce lawyer need?
• Are you entitled to alimony or spousal support?
• Will you lose your health care benefits?
• Are you entitled to a portion of your spouse's pension when he or she retires?
• Can you receive temporary assistance so you can return to school to become self-supporting (usually a question from spouses who have always stayed home and taken care of the house and children)?
You may think of other questions you need to ask your divorce lawyer, but these are the most common ones. Many women who have careers are also concerned because in some states alimony is based on the earning capacity of each spouse. This means if a woman has an income that is substantially higher than her husband's, she may have to pay him alimony instead of the other way around.
If you have minor children you may wish to ask the divorce lawyer if you can remain in the house without having to pay off the spouse—at least until the children are old enough to be on their own. Do not assume in all cases the custodial parent will be given the house—while this does sometimes happen, it usually comes with other limitations such as you get the house but your husband gets all the cars, vacation home or money in the bank.