I recently got a message from an associate of mine on Linked In. The message excited me because it gave me a chance to talk about drama…what it is and why my book Stop Workplace Drama is even for men, for owners, and even for those who are lucky enough to experience a collaborative work environment. Read on and then let me share with you a few other signs of drama and how it holds you back.
“Could this book be for me? It is 4:41 am and up because of a "worry" dream and I can't fall back to sleep. I’m concerned about others and their feels, even though it is out of my control.
I had pigeon-holed your book into thinking Stop Workplace Drama was more about "cat" fights or drama fights and bickering in the office.
Since we don't see those in our 8 employee office at all I didn't think this book was relative to me. Now after reading an article about your book, it seems to have more relevance as it appears to be more about "my thinking" and how I coop or handle certain situations when there is competing intentions in play. “
Here’s a guy who really gets it.
In my book Stop Workplace Drama I created a new language for drama: What it is, how to identify it, how it manifests, and why it’s a part of everyone’s life.
Most of us have a preconceived idea about what drama is, and that is why I had to create a whole new meaning. There are those who say, “I don’t do drama, and then on the other end are those who say, I have a lot of women working for me, so we have lots of drama.”
The definition for “drama” in Stop Workplace Drama is this: Any obstacle to your peace or prosperity.
Any obstacle.
Doesn’t matter what the obstacle is.
Yes, the obstacle can be other people. The co-worker who rubs you the wrong way. The Queen Bee in the office, the bully, the bad boss, or the slacker.
The obstacle can be outside forces, for example the new technology that forces change in your office or the new law that is a threat to your operation.
The obstacle can even be internal and others may not be aware of it. You are so shy you can’t give a presentation. Your self-esteem is so low you can’t force yourself to go to the chamber networking event. You keep obsessing about your finances, your health or your relationships.
When your peace is threatened, it threatens your prosperity. Think about how drama due to a rude boss, leads to absenteeism, presenteeism, and turnover.
So now you know that drama is just a part of life and workplace drama is not due to women having cat fights, although that can be one way drama manifests.
Off the top of my head, I can think up five more manifestations of drama that might show up even when there is no cat fight, no verbal abuse, and no female employees.
1. obsessive worry
2. Guilt about the past
3. Avoiding a difficult conversation
4. Fear of not measuring up.
5. Burning resentment
Stop Workplace Drama is as much about the inner game as it is about communication skills, and the outer measures and methods of business success.
The reason there will always be drama is because with growth and change there will always be obstacles. The important distinction is “the” drama versus “your” drama. The drama happens. The drama is the circumstance…the obstacle we have been talking about.
Your drama is how you experience and deal with the obstacle. Do you feel capable to navigate around the obstacle, or do you freak out? It’s not about getting enough will power to respond appropriately, although that can be a temporary fix. Stop Workplace Drama is about changing your experience so that reacting appropriately is just what comes out of you. It’s about leading from clarity and intention and getting back to peace as quickly as humanly possible even in the midst of rapid change.
No peace eventually leads to no prosperity. No prosperity, also leads to no peace. Peace and prosperity goes hand in hand.
Ready to Stop Workplace Drama? Marlene Chism, author of Stop Workplace Drama, invites you to learn more about her new book and Stop Your Drama Methodology, eight principles to help leaders gain clarity and reduce workplace drama. Receive free gifts for stopping by during Stop Your Drama Month.