How to Make Positive Changes in Your Life

One of the things that holds us back from making positive changes in our lives is the fear that things will be worse in the future than they are now. We cling to the ideas and circumstances we’ve already created, even if their purpose is finished. But if we don’t lovingly let go of the old, we can’t bring in the new. We stay stuck in old patterns.

Often what causes us to move ahead is that we get angry with the current situation. That could be a relationship, a car or appliance that is constantly breaking down, a job or career path—anything. While that may move you into making a change, doing so from a place of anger brings with it struggle and pain.

I can attest to that! In retrospect I can see that I needed to move from my teaching position to something else in order to expand. I hung on to it, even though I was less satisfied with it than I had been. It had been my purpose for a long time and I didn’t want to look at my changing feelings out of fear for what the future would bring. But when a new head of school was hired, we butted heads. I was frequently angry. Finally, I decided to leave. I didn’t really want to but I felt pushed out and that made me angry too. Needless to say, my transition was hard.

I finally found my purpose again, but only after a few years. I needed the time to learn how to view the past with compassion for myself and others. And I needed to be able to let it go. If it hadn’t been for the circumstances of the past, I quite probably would have missed the out on the teachings and growth that I experienced subsequently.

The path of joy is a much easier road.

The path of joy means looking with compassion on the present and what it has to tell you. Instead of focusing on what you don’t like about what’s going on now, look for what it’s revealing to you. Appreciate that.

Then focus on what you want. You may not be clear on what your purpose is, and what career path you’d like to take. But you can be clear on how you want to feel. You can be clear about what things bring you joy. How can you feel those feelings now, in the present moment? When you practice feeling good, you’ll start to attract into your life the circumstances, people and things you need to create the new life you desire.

Along with focusing on what you want, cultivate a belief that the future will be so much better than it is now. You are the creator of your reality. What you give your attention and energy to now, will become your future.

Play with the idea of allowing new things into your life.

Have you ever witnessed a young child discover something new? It delights them! Even if it’s a baby discovering his or her toes for the first time! So let yourself play and open up to the world like a child.

Try new routines each day. We live our lives on automatic so much of the time. The pandemic has caused many people to have to re-think their routines and careers. That’s been a positive aspect, but wouldn’t it be nice to do this without a pandemic?

What can you do that’s new? Learn a new skill, try a new food, go someplace you’ve never been, read a new book? When you experience the new, you, like a child, feel a sense of aliveness. It focuses you in the present moment. And the present moment is where all your power is. It’s the place where you can take action.

So don’t follow my example! Learn from my mistakes instead. There’s a saying that you can’t leave what you don’t love. Perhaps you can leave, but leaving in anger won’t feel good. Creating what you want will be much harder.

Learning compassion for the present and playing with allowing new experiences in your life will more joyfully and successfully open up the future.