Learn to name your fear

Does anything in your life scare you? Perhaps there’s something you’re afraid to do or say?

I bet there is. In fact, I know there is. Because we humans rely on fear to survive. (And have for a long time. Like, millions of years long.) Very often, fear runs our life.

Most of us hate hearing this because we hate our fears.

We blame our fear for our failures. We blaspheme it as the great ruiner of our lives.

We want to know how to face our fears.

Here’s the thing. Blaming your fear actually does nothing for you. You might as well blame the sky for raining, the Earth for turning, or Chipotle for making delicious burritos. A.k.a. you are cursing things that aren’t going to change.

So what can you do?

Step one of overcoming your fears: You must identify what they are and give them a name.

While this sounds simple, it's far more complicated than we realize. Because our fears are so deeply rooted, they talk to our bodies before talking to our brains. That’s why we start sweating or breathing heavily even before we realize precisely what’s going on. Fear triggers a physical response, and it generally takes a few beats for our minds to catch up. Sometimes our minds don’t catch up at all.

Before you can overcome any obstacle, you must identify what it is. Facing your fears is no different.

Once you name your fear, you’ve got to determine if it’s valid. Remember, a lot of our fear responses are designed for prehistoric threats that no longer exist. For example, you might feel terrified to try something new. Your body is saying, “Danger! Danger!” But is it really dangerous?

While the fear we feel is real, that doesn’t mean the catalyst for fear is. Ask yourself if your fear serves you. Is it a legitimate fear, or would you be able to survive?

If it's no valid, you've got to talk back to it. Getting rid of your fear is impossible, but not listening to it is.

Learning how to face your fears takes time and self-awareness, but the efforts are worth it.