Unemployed Husband Not Looking For Work: How To Deal With Unemployed Husband

Unemployed Husband Not Looking For Work: How To Deal With Unemployed Husband

This is a very touchy subject for most people. Money problems are one of the most common causes for divorce. No woman wants to be with some deadbeat guy, and no man wants to be with some lazy woman who sits on the couch all day watching TV. Not having enough money to pay the essentials and still give you the freedom to buy the things you want without making you feel guilty is something that will affect us all at some point.

Losing your job is traumatic enough. It gets even harder when your partner is hounding you to get a job... any job. None of us ever plan to lose our jobs. When that moment comes we are often left unprepared with debt we incurred figured in while previously employed. Many people live in 2 income households and take on the debt relative to that income. Trying to get by puts an incredible amount of pressure on one partner to stretch their pay check to try and cover everything.

What develops over time is anxiety and resentment. As one person contemplates their next step the pressure on the partner bringing home the bacon could get short if there appears to be a lack of effort on the other to find new employment. Quite often the laid off or fired partner takes time to contemplate their future, sometimes with romantic aspirations of starting their own business, or going back to school for their dream job. Unless this person is decisive and diligent, they often take weeks and months to make a decision, leaving their spouses to foot the bill.

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Ultimately what will happen is the employed partner will give the other an ultimatum. Get a job or else. No-one wants to hear that from their partner but often it's just what they need, a swift kick in the pants. No-one likes looking for a job. It sucks. We all can agree the interview process can be a little intimidating. But it's a necessary evil. In order to get that dream job you have to be in position to get it, because there are hundred others who want it too.

If you lose your job, be sure you don't take a lackadaisical approach to getting a new one. Get off your butt and make things happen. Don't let pride get in the way of progress. You may have been given severance, but that money won't last. It's not like free money. It's merely funds to assist you until you find a new job. Remember the burden this places on your partner and family. Sure in the beginning they'll support your ambitions for a new career or going back to school, but remember they will grow resentful as the bills mount and there is less and less money to go around.

To the partner of the unemployed, try and be compassionate and empathetic. Losing ones job is devastating for most people. It can be a real blow to ones self esteem. Listen to their new ambitions, and talk with them about being realistic about those time frames. Be upfront about your ability or willingness to support the household if need be. Also you'll have to be firm and guiding. Put time limits on how long you're willing to wait until they start earning again. Being upfront about your responsibilities and limitations will ensure the transition is a smooth and hopefully short one.

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Getting married can be one of life's most joyous occasions, but it also involves a lot of give and take. The first few years of a marriage tend to be rocky, as it is a transition period when each partner is trying to define his/her role from "me" to "we".

After the pre-wedding excitement and anticipation, many couples tend to find themselves, disappointed and distorted by the realties of married life. The letdown is very normal and most of the couples experience some form of "post wedding blues". The fact is, no matter how well or how long you know someone, the daily routine of living together often takes people by surprise.

Even couples who have had a live-in relationship prior to marriage tend to find it difficult to cope up with the new adjustments and compromises. Unfortunately, there exists no secrets to martial bliss and the only thing you can do is communicate willingly and frankly with your partner.

If at any time you or your partner feels that you have a hard time communicating with each other, it's a dangerous sign and you are advised to get premarital counseling. It's never too early for a relationship to give it the time and attention it deserves, especially so if it helps ease the transition from marriage and reduce destructive conflicts.

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The popular cliche "marry the person, marry the family" has more to it than most people care to accept. Even couples who did not share strong ties with their families earlier tend to find themselves fighting over how involved they want their families to be in their new life.

Always keep in mind that marriage brings with it an exclusive set of issues, experiences and values. Try to be sensitive to your partner's feelings, expectations and needs and let them know that they always come first.

One of the common causes of friction in marriage is money; each partner tends to have differences in volume of spending money. Many couples prefer to keep their fiances separate. Common household expenses such as food are paid through a joint account while personal bills are maintained separately.

This method allows each person to maintain their financial independence and eliminate arguments. However, this is not recommended as it often builds a wall of mistrust between the partners. Although managing your finances can be the least romantic part of a marriage, it is an important constituent in which both partners must be involved in.

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When you realize that your marriage is heading for trouble, don't lose hope for it's never too late to save a marriage as long as you and your spouse put an effort into it. However, with the emotional trauma and heartaches you are experiencing, sometimes you could take some missteps in trying to save your marriage. Below is your guide to avoiding the 4 wrong steps to save a marriage. Taking these steps to save a marriage can crush any hope of saving a marriage or winning back your spouse.

1. Continue having secret meetings with your lover. This is something you cannot do. When one of the reasons for your troubled marriage is extra marital relationship, you have to stop seeing your lover. Put an end to your relationship right away. There is no longer any reason to justify seeing your lover. Instead, take the opportunity to focus your mind to change your lifestyle and attitudes towards your marriage. The last thing you want is for your spouse to start wondering if you are still having a relationship with your lover.

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2. Failing to find time for your spouse. Your wife is feeling more vulnerable in moments where you are experiencing troubles in your marriage. As a husband, make every effort to assure her of your love. Spend more time with your spouse by avoiding working late if possible. Skip your boys' night out and promise to spend more time with your wife.

3. Spending time by yourself. Now is the time to work hard to save your marriage by showing your commitment by participating in your relationship. Let your spouse know that you are there for her/him and not just a housemate. Spend time to talk to your spouse. Build better rapport. Win your spouse all over again. Share a cup of coffee, wine and dine together. Take showers together. Learn to have fun with your spouse. Do things together instead of alone.

4. Forgetting the romance. This is one department too many men seem to forget. The department of love and romance. You need to romance your spouse more than ever. Sometimes, men believe that romance goes out the window once you have gotten your wife. Romance should be a constant companion in your marriage. It needs to be rekindled over the years. Keep the romance going. You will be rewarded well with your effort as you take steps to save a marriage.

Do you want to reawaken a committed and loving relationship in your marriage? There are proven steps that are amazingly powerful that will help you overcome conflicts and breathe life back into your marriage. This is a plan you do not want to pass by. Click here to see the proven steps on how to save your marriage.

Countless thousands of new couples end up screaming in just a short time of marriage - stop this divorce! What they need to do is seek out some advice, and one way to do that is to buy a marriage counseling book.

They're loaded with professional advice from experts on the subject. These authors have dealt with multiple thousands of cases and are armed with tips and advice that can save your marriage.

Many married couples are turning their lives around with the use of good marital advice. Pre-marital counseling has also proven to be a huge foundational tool for making a marriage work. This counseling makes the couple aware of things that could happen, before they do, give them a 'heads up' on how to deal with these mostly unforeseen problems.

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When you buy a marriage counseling book, you may be buying the exact thing that will stop this divorce in its tracks. By acting quickly, you don't allow things to fester, and grow bigger walls for you to climb over.

Never let yourself get so full of pride that you can't accept help. Stubborn and unforgiving people rarely survive marital problems. You have to stay open, and put your marriage and your spouse first. No other way will do.

In order to stop this divorce, the price of a marriage counseling book is a cheap way to learn to cope. Take advantage of the times, get that book, read it, digest it, and then apply it. You'll be glad you did.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.