Every year in December, magazines cover the same old story, how to survive the holidays. Every year they generally say the same thing; keep it simple, have a plan, be
HoEvery year in December, magazines cover the same old story, how to survive the holidays. Every year they generally say the same thing; keep it simple, have a plan, be organized, don’t worry. It’s pretty much just recycled and repackaged advice year after year.
So, let’s look at a different way of approaching the holiday season that just might just take you by surprise. Let’s start with your imagination, because as we all know that’s where every story begins. I’d like to take you back to a story you probably heard as a child, a story about a man called Scrooge. Scrooge was not the nicest of people to be around, especially during the holidays. Right before Christmas, Scrooge was visited by three ghosts; one from his past, one from his present, and one from his future. The ghosts’ mission was simple; to awaken Scrooge to the fact that he needs to change, that if he carries on living his life in the same old way it will end badly. To cut a long story short, having a preview of his past, present and future enables Scrooge to really ‘get it.’
Scrooge is horrified by what he sees and begs to be given another chance to live his life differently. He awakes on Christmas day with a new perspective and is able to change his life for the better. By looking at his future life he was able to see what he was doing wrong and what he needed do to change his future for the better.
Why am I telling you this?
Well, you too can take this journey into the future. I’m not talking about time travel. I’m talking about the power of your imagination. Think for a second about your upcoming holiday and all the things that could go wrong and all the things that you are afraid of…
Now Stop.
Those thoughts will play out and become a reality for you unless you put in new thoughts. What do you want? How would you like your holiday to look like if you could have your heart’s desire? It’s a well know fact that what we think about we will eventually create. As we approach the holidays our gut instinct is often to want to control everything. We want that special day to go perfectly and for everyone to be happy and healthy and having a good time, right?
Well, instead of trying to control things, fearing it will be another disaster or hoping it will be ok, why not take control of your holiday by visualizing ‘the perfect day,’ by using our most powerful tool – our mind.
As Jack Canfield, co-author of the ‘Chicken Soup for the Soul’ books once said: “You only have control over three things in your life – the thoughts you think, the images you visualize and the actions you take.” So, lets go on a journey into your future and create ‘your dream holiday.’
Before we get started, think about watching the movie ‘A Christmas Carol’ or it’s equivalent ‘Ghosts of Girlfriends Past.’ It will really help you understand this concept and its importance. When you are ready to begin, close your eyes and really think about how you’d like things to go. By really thinking about and focusing on what we really want we are setting our intention and we are sending out the message that says ‘this is what I want to happen during the holiday’.
Walt Disney famously said ‘If you can dream it you can do it’. He wasn’t the only one. Countless people throughout history have based their lives and built their dreams based on this simple yet overlooked concept. Everything we physically have right now from the TV to our cars, was once an idea in someone’s mind – they saw it in their mind first and then they created it. You can do the same with something as simple as ‘the perfect holiday.’ When you do the visualization remember to use all of your senses to bring your ideal holiday to life in your imagination. Smell the turkey coming out of the oven, taste the freshly baked minced pies, see all your family getting along great around the dinner table, hear the laughter of your kids and feel the warmth of a genuine loving hug from your in-laws. Just try it. See it all going perfectly. If there are usually certain problems that occur every year, see it all working out perfectly. If you don’t celebrate Christmas then use this for new year celebrations or other family gatherings.
Once you’re done remember to re-visualize your idea of your perfect holiday every day until your holiday arrives. If you do this daily by the time your holiday arrives you will be giving off such a relaxed positive vibe that you will feel amazing and that feeling will no doubt rub off on everyone else and change how they act, without them even realizing. Don’t forget though to keep the positive visualizations going throughout the holidays to keep the momentum.
Remember, your energy can change the vibration of the whole house so make it as positive and optimistic as possible. Whatever you visualize, make it fun and forget don’t forget to imagine yourself giving and receiving the perfect present.
Sometimes people say to me, “but Nicola I can’t visualize” to which I reply lovingly “Neither can I, so make it up instead. Just use your imagination, that is exactly what those that visualize are doing too… making it up. It’s easy.”
From my heart to yours, Nicola
P.S If your marriage is in serious trouble or you are currently going through or coming out of a separation or divorce and are dreading the holidays – get in touch with me. Throughout December I will be making time in my schedule for 3 Free Consultations each week.
PP.S If you know the holidays are a trigger time for you or are scared that things may not go as planned. I will be available to support you through it and to help you create the 2017 you truly want. I already have several confirmed appointments for Christmas and New Year already and want you to know, that I will be here, ready if you want someone to help you deal with any challenges, fears, loneliness or other stressful situations. Where we can look at overcoming the past and creating a fresh start. A year to look forward to. If this resonates with you my number is +971509454233 you can what’s app me to book your slot if and when you want to.
With love and best wishes x
Nicola Beer is an International Relationship & Divorce Coach who helps her clients find peace and create a new beginning after Marriage Breakdown and Divorce. This includes helping couples on the verge of a breakup to resolve their relationship issues once and for all, so that they can revive the love, passion, respect, and fun that's been missing.
As well as helping clients during and after Divorce to manage stress, create more income and adjust to new financial realities, redefine who they are, create a new social life, and when they are ready attract someone great. Nicola also runs 2 parenting programs that support children through and after divorce
Nicola has combined 11 years' experience helping people with emotional issues. This comprises 7 years private coaching and 4 years as a volunteer for the Samaritans where she supported callers dealing with any emotional distress. She is UK certified in Coaching, Grief Recovery for Adults and Children, NLP, Time Line Therapy, Hypnosis.
Nicola's passion to support people before, during and after divorce comes from her own childhood, where due to the stress of divorce her mother suffered a mental breakdown. As 1 of 5 children the divorce was devastating for her family and affected each of her family in different ways. More recently Nicola's older sister with 4 children is going through a difficult divorce. Having experienced and seen the pain and stress associated with divorce Nicola is focused on proving solutions. She knows divorce doesn't have to mean disaster and takes her clients and their children from surviving to thriving. She is equally passionate about saving marriages, so has a program to overcome relationship problems.
Nicola works with expats and locals, Muslims and Non-Muslims from all over the world, mainly from Dubai, London, India, Saudi Arabia, Singapore, either in person for a 2 day intensive package or further afield US, Australia via video conference and phone.