When I read the word calm, the first thing that comes to my mind, is the beautiful sea. Having been raised in a city along the coastline, it is very difficult to not fall in love with the sea. It has this soothing, calming effect on the mind. In a life too fast to catch up, the sea brings some calm.
So, what exactly do I mean by calm and the calming effect? Let's have a look.
What is calm?
• The term 'calm' is a feeling, where you feel no strong emotion, like hate, anger, fear or even excessive love. It is a state of quietness and serenity during which, you experience absolute liberation, from the emotional point of view.
• Calm or calmness, is not to be confused with being devoid of feeling. You do feel a lot of positive emotions like peacefulness, hopefulness, etc.
• Calm can either be a state of being or a feeling. The difference is minute and yet very big.
• When a person is in a calm state, it means he/she has absolute control over the emotions he/she is going through
• When a person feels calm, there is an absolute lack of strong emotions. Normally there is a constant hurricane of emotions in the human mind, waiting to unleash itself the first chance it gets. But when one feels calm, one actually lacks any negative, strong emotion.
• So, when I said that the sea has a calming effect on me, I meant I feel calm while looking at the sea. All the negativity is drained out and I am left with a sense of tranquillity
• However, if lets assume there is some event taking place and I am nervous, excited and also angry because not everything is going my way. If in such a scenario, I maintain a calm face and don't let my anger or frustration burst out, then that would be maintaining a state of calm.
• It is not a neutral point. It is a positive point and has a positive impact as well.
I hope that the concept on what calm means, is clear.
In that case, the next step would be to understand why it is important to stay calm.
This is a question that very few and if I might add, highly intellectual people ask.
Because as per most studies of behavioural sciences and also as life has taught us, it is very important to not keep our feeling and emotions cooped up. The longer we chain our emotions, the greater the risk of a volcanic eruption! It's literally like a pressure cooker in our minds.
But like every good argument, this one too is faced with an even more competitive one. Listed below are reason why it is extremely important to stay calm (or not lose it!) as far as possible.
1. You lose objectivity if you don't stay calm.
When we let out all our anger and frustration and everything gets unleashed, we also unleash our sense of objectivity. Objectivity is what shows us the way towards improving for the better. So imagine what a horrible bargain that is.
2. You say things you don't mean.
Or worse, you do something! When you are not calm and all jumpy, 99.99% you end up saying something you would never say in a normal circumstance. And that is rarely a good thing.
God Forbid, you should do something in a fit of rage! In that case you'll probably have not much say in anything ever again.
What we say when we are not calm, we pay for when we are calm.
3. It is not healthy.
Excess of anything is harmful to our health is a fact. Then wouldn't that also apply to emotions?
Every now and then, it becomes absolutely essential to bring down the flame under our pot of emotions and spend time being calm and composed. There is no set rule as to what can calm you; but whatever it is, you must practise it and you must allow your mind some time out.
In fact, the calmer you stay, the more diseases stay at bay. So all those dangerous things like hypertension, high blood pressure, anxiety, etc. can be avoided if we stay calm.
4. Makes a good impression.
This one need plain observation; are you more likely to be impressed by someone who keeps jumping up and down like a bulldog, when stressed or by someone who knows how to be calm and keep their cool, no matter what the situation?. I know my answer.
In this last part, I'd like to share some techniques which I believe will help you tremendously to stay calm. Please note that these are not some points that will blow your mind, just some good old techniques we tend to forget.
Techniques to stay calm:
• Breathe deeply and breath often (especially when stressed)
• Always leave a noisy room, for 2 minutes, every hour (noise breeds stress).
• When feeling extremely overwhelmed, take a walk. Get some air.
• As a policy, never talk to someone when you are already angry or upset. You may end up bursting out at the wrong person. So only talk once you are calm.
• Keep a stress ball handy (readily available in markets and even online).
• Drink cool water and close your eyes while you do so. This Cools the whole system down.
• Take good rest and always get sufficient sleep. People who don't sleep enough are the grumpiest and always have bursts of anger.
• Take some time out and go to your happy place. Like mine is the sea, yours could be a café or your room or even your bathroom! Where ever you find peace of mind.
• Mind over matter. Nothing is important enough to cause you a cardiac arrest. Too much stress can kill you. Let the fear of that be your motivator.
In the modern era, where everything is such a big issue and tolerance levels are constantly being breached, one cannot fathom the importance of staying calm. Whatever the reason may be, we need to understand that losing our cool is so not the solution.
I am not preaching or teaching the importance of meditation (that one comes later), but I am most certainly reminding you that you are what you choose to be. And if it is a personal choice, I prefer being calm and composed.
So ring out the harm and ring in the calm!
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My name is Vaidehi Vihari. I am a regular girl, living the twentysomething life. I am a student of everything there is to learn. Spreading happiness one word at a time.