Anger is one emotion we all have. For some of us anger is the primary way we express our needs when we get upset. Anger is usually a response to some other feeling or emotion we are having. Really give it some thought. Think about the last time you were really upset. Were you upset because someone hurtyour feelings? Perhaps you felt ashamed, blamed, or insulted? Anger is usually a secondary response on the human mind". There is usually some other emotion that precedes it. Learning to understand our emotions that get masked by anger is the first way to understand how we convey our unmet needs more appropriately.
Taking a class in anger management can be really helpful. Anger management classes are not just for "angry" people. Anger management classes are used by human resources, managers, law offices, school personal, families and volunteer. Most professional anger management classes teach skills that many of us just don't learn in school or in life. You will learn better ways of talking so that your true feelings and needs get expressed.
Most anger management classes teach skills in assertiveness. Gaining skills in assertive communication will help get your needs, emotions, and thoughts heard in the most appropriate way. When we speak assertively, we do it in a unrestricted tone, we don’t use profanity, we make good eye contact, and we feel upbeat about ourselves. The opposite of being assertive is being aggressive, passive-aggressive or just passive.
Most anger management classes also teach skills in increasing our emotional intelligence. When we increase our empathy we are better able understand the feelings other people might be experiencing. Becoming more emotionally tuned in gives us the ability to not get as irritated with others and have better insight into our own feelings. Many anger management classes teach these skills.
The bottom line is, don't allow your anger to destroy an important relationship. Anger is an emotion that can be understood. Bad behavior can be replaced with more positive and appropriate behaviors. The more you can understand about your own anger the quicker you will be able to do something about it. Most folks lets their hostile anger control their impulses. In many cases anger has ruined lives by damaging relationships and dissolving partnerships. Acquiring skills in an anger management program could alter your life for the better. Enroll in a program and get started. Getting help could make all the difference in your life. If you can't find a local class, consider a quality online anger management class as well.
Ari Novick, Ph.D. is Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist and a certified anger management provider for both adults and adolescents. Dr. Novick is also an adjunct professor of psychology at Pepperdine University's Graduate School of Education and Psychology. His corporate website is http://www.ajnovickgroup.com and his innovative online anger management class is available at http://www.angerclassonline.com