Personal Accountability in Five Minutes or Less

If you are going to be successful in life you must embrace what contributes to your life, repel what detracts from it, and to accept responsibility for everything in it. If you are personally accountable then you accept the consequences of your actions, words, and decisions, regardless if the outcome is important or significant.

A first step in being accountable is taking responsibility for your actions. Whenever you are tempted to blame someone or something for an unpleasant circumstance in your life, do the opposite--take responsibility for it. Taking responsibility is not the same as feeling shame or blame. We are not solely responsible for all the circumstances of our lives and are not accountable for what happens beyond our control. We can choose how we respond to it. As we seek to take more responsibility for the quality of our lives, we can benefit by asking two questions: “What did I do to help create this situation?” and, “What can I do to turn this situation around?”

Dr. Lisabeth Saunders Medlock, our official guide to Personal Accountability has developed a series of five steps designed to help people tell the truth about themselves. Telling the truth allows us to shed our old skin to be ready to recreate ourselves and our futures through setting goals and being accountable for them.

1) Stop shaming and blaming: We can learn to see shame or blame as excess baggage and just set them aside. We could acknowledge and even regret our mistakes and shortcomings while accepting ourselves completely. We can begin working with our list of weaknesses by celebrating them. The more successful people are, the more likely they are to be open to looking at their flaws. We can love and accept ourselves and still work really hard to change ourselves.

2) Forgive yourself: One powerful way to move from shame to acceptance is to forgive ourselves. Before practicing new skills and new ways of being, it’s wise to clean house. We don’t need to beat ourselves up before we re-invent ourselves. We can be totally honest with ourselves and, at the same time, be gentle. While admitting our mistakes, we can treat ourselves with care. After all, everyone makes mistakes.

3) Let go of the past, but learn from it: We can focus on what we have learned from our past, without getting caught up in repeating our mistakes. The past is over. There is nothing you can do to change the past. The past is useful in showing us things we do not want to repeat and in exploring lessons we have learned that can be helpful in creating change in the future.

4) Face Your fears: We all have them and they are responsible for holding us back. To identify our fears we need to pay attention and become an observer of ourselves. When we say we are afraid, underneath is a belief we have about ourselves- I am not skilled enough, good enough. etc., or a belief about the world--there is too much competition, people won’t like what I have to offer, etc. When we can let go of fear we can release ourselves in powerful ways.

5) See the connection between strengths and limitations: Most people place strengths and weaknesses in separate, unrelated categories. Another way to perceive them is as being closely related. Often the things about ourselves that we label as weaknesses are simply examples of taking our strengths too far. A person with a passion for organization can become obsessed with details and lose sight of overall goals. A person who listens well may forget to speak about his own thoughts and feelings. The point is to remember that our assets and liabilities may all be part of the same personal account.

You can learn more about Dr. Medlock and download her free Guide to Strategically Plan your Life by clicking here . Now it’s time for our question of the day. What are the key areas in your life that you want to take more responsibility for? Please share your answers in the comments below.