What To Do When Your Wife Stops Sleeping With You: Wife Avoids Intimacy

The sexless wife is often the stereotype of the downtrodden everyman in stories and comedies especially but if you have a sexless wife then you know it is no laughing matter. The humiliation and misery of being rejected by the one who was suppose to be your lover for life can be an awful experience that strains marriages to breaking point and often beyond. These tips will hopefully help you pull back from that brink and help you bring back intimacy and love to your marriage.

Start off Slow: While being romantic and an object of desire is essential to rekindling the passion women are not creatures to be forced or drawn into such things easily. If you come in too hard and fast with ploys to have sex you will drive your woman further away from you and damage your relationship further. Start of slow and try to be friends again and learn to enjoy each others company like you did back in the early days. This slowly, slowly approach will generate more goodwill and sexual desire than any overblown romantic dinner.

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Beware the Wall of Resentment: Resentments can build up in a marriage like a dam being filled. Eventually the dam will be breached and it will all fall apart but when the dam is filling it can seriously inhibit your sex life as your wife may subconsciously not see you as her sexy husband but as the man who did this and that... or didn't do this and that.

You need to work to break down this invisible wall of resentment that has split you from the intimacy of a good relationship and as such has effected your love making as well.

Communicate: You must learn to speak with your sexless wife in an honest, calm and deep way to uncover the resentments and their issues with sex. This often comes undone if you start making the talk about yourself and your desires rather than hers so make sure you play the role of the strong supportive husband and play detective as well to uncover and solve the problems and resentments. Nothing is sexier than a man who can solve problems to most women!

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After finally deciding to commit his life to one woman in marriage... After the "I do's" are said... After the honeymoon is over... And, as married life begins...most men desire to be a nice, pleasant, pleasing, helpful, and accommodating husband.

And unfortunately, for many men, that's when the trouble begins. In fact, it's not unusual for it to be only a matter of a few weeks to a few months until a man begins to think that getting married was a HUGE mistake.

Here's what I want you to realize, there's a right way to be a good husband. And, there's a wrong way to be a good husband.

Let's explore...

Imagine a freshly-married Mr. and Mrs. Jones returning from their honeymoon... He goes back to his evening job (3 pm until 11 pm). And, she goes back to her day job (8 am until 5 pm).

Because he's off during the day, Mrs. Jones "sweetly" asks Mr. Jones if he would mind doing some small chore or errand for her "since he's off during the day."

And, since Mr. Jones wants to be a "good" husband, he happily agrees to do the chore or errand.

But of course, there's a lot that has to be done in the "running" of a home / house / marriage. And so of course, Mrs. Jones just keeps adding one thing after another to Mr. Jones's list of chores and errands.

Before he knows it, Mr. Jones is doing most of the household chores. He's cleaning house, washing dishes, doing the laundry, getting groceries, running all the errands...

And then, Mr. Jones goes to work.

Later, Mrs. Jones comes home from work. And, she's tired from working all day. So, she sits down, watches her soaps that she recorded during the day or watches whatever evening sitcom she happens to like and then she goes to bed.

Afterwards, Mr. Jones returns home from his job - hoping to find Mrs. Jones feeling a bit intimate - only to find that she's sound asleep or "not in the mood" or "too tired" or "I've got to get up early in the morning".

And, before long, no matter what Mr. Jones does, no matter how far he goes out of his way, no matter what sacrifices or how many sacrifices he makes, no matter what help he offers or provides... IT'S NEVER ENOUGH!

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And of course, it goes without saying that if anything goes wrong, is forgotten, or gets neglected, then by default it is ALWAYS Mr. Jones's fault.

And the fights begin...

But then, they'll make up and Mrs. Jones asks Mr. Jones for a cat because she just so loves cats and she PROMISES that she'll take care of the cat - it will be HER responsibility...

And again, Mr. Jones wants to be a good husband and even though he doesn't like cats, he agrees to help Mrs. Jones find the "perfect" cat...

$300 later, they've found that "purrr-fect" cat...

And a few days later, Mr. Jones is the only one taking care of the cat...in addition to everything else that he's taking care of.

In wanting to be a "good" husband, Mr. Jones has ALLOWED himself to become responsible for EVERYTHING while Mrs. Jones has got out of being responsible for ANYTHING around the house.

To Mr. Jones, this is a HUGE problem.

To Mrs. Jones, there is NO problem...everything is exactly the way she likes it and wants it.

Sadly, some men spend a life-time living like this...

Men, here is your WAKE-UP CALL - a woman is never attracted to a "push-over" man who responds and reacts to her every whim, request, or demand.

Or, more bluntly, a woman is never interested in sex with a "push-over" man. She's too busy fantasizing about having sex with some strong, masculine man to be interested in having sex with her "weenie" husband.

Now, I'm not suggesting that men shouldn't help out around the house or that men shouldn't do household chores because they should...

In other words, the inverse of this story - where the woman gets saddled with all of the household responsibilities while the man accepts none of them - doesn't work either.

Going back to our story... The fact is, Mr. Jones should do certain chores before he goes to work. And, Mrs. Jones should do certain chores when she get's home after work.

In simple terms, household work must be split up in a way that is fair and equitable. If Mr. Jones wants to be a "good" husband, he should take the conversational lead and establish what is fair and equitable given their circumstances and arrangements.

If he had done this at the very beginning of the marriage, then it's unlikely there would have ever been a problem.

But now... Now that Mrs. Jones expects him to be her "servant", there is a problem...

It's going to take time and calm-confrontation for Mr. Jones to "re-train" her and "re-set" her expectations of what her part in the marriage is.

For example, if Mrs. Jones fails to do her part of the chores when she comes home - those chores they've agreed in conversation that she would do, then Mr. Jones will IMMEDIATELY stop doing any chores or errands that pertain to Mrs. Jones - for sake of example, let's say no longer doing any of her laundry.

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Similarly, if Mrs. Jones chooses to criticize and pick apart something Mr. Jones has done, then Mr. Jones IMMEDIATELY stops doing that thing for her. Again, using the laundry example, if she doesn't like something about how he does her laundry, then he immediately - without fuss or fanfare - stops doing any of her laundry.

It will be one less thing that Mr. Jones has to do and it won't take Mrs. Jones very long to start "understanding" that she has to do her part and she has to do it in a PLEASANT way.

As another example, if Mrs. Jones fails to take responsibility for her "cat", Mr. Jones can calmly, politely give her one warning reminder after which Mr. Jones simply gets rid of the cat.

Now, Mrs. Jones may "throw a fit" - maybe even a "huge fit" - but she'll get the message loud and clear that there is zero-tolerance from her husband when she doesn't "line up" and "carry" her part of the load.

And here's the best part...

This NEW Mr. Jones is going to start feeling a whole lot better about himself...

And, Mrs. Jones is going to start feeling a whole lot more sexually attracted to this NEW man - the NEW Mr. Jones.

One last thing, some women are so used to getting everything their way that they will literally throw almost ANY kind of tantrum to get their way when they are resisted. A man needs to expect this so that he can deal with it in a calm way.

As an example, Mrs. Jones may go so far as to threaten Mr. Jones with divorce if he doesn't let her get her way...

This is where many men crumble - especially when there are kids involved - and when he crumbles, Mrs. Jones then knows that she FULLY CONTROLS her husband - and her tyranny will not only continue, it will increase to even worse level.

When faced with a fit-throwing Mrs. Jones, Mr. Jones would be better served to calmly remind Mrs. Jones that:

o He loves her

o A marriage takes two people carrying their part of the load and working TOGETHER

o They have talked about and mutually agreed upon what part of the load was whose to carry

o He expects whoever is married to him to carry her part of the load just as he expects himself to carry his part of the load

o Mrs. Jones always has the prerogative to choose whether she wants to carry her part of the load WITH him or go somewhere else because she doesn't want to carry her part of the load - and she should decide right now once and for all which way she wants it to be.

Almost always, Mrs. Jones will be shocked out of her selfish little game-playing. She'll be AWAKENED to just how much she respects and admires her husband - and just how sexy and attractive he really is.

And, in that rare case where Mrs. Jones actually does follow through with her threat and leaves - well, fellow, she was going to leave anyway - it was just a matter of time. It's to your advantage to get it over with so that you can start your life anew - with someone who ISN'T a selfish little brat.

Next, click here now to find out why your spouse is lying to you about the reasons they want a divorce. Follow the information step by step and you will discover the truth, cut through the lies and pain, stop divorce dead in its tracks, and rebuild the strong, intimate marriage you've always wanted... even if your spouse doesn't want to!

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Recently I came across some very valuable information that has changed the way I view my marriage. And I am happy to say that I took steps to save my marriage today. These are not steps that I used to take; in fact they actually were the opposite of what I had been doing when my spouse first wanted to separate. But once I learned these secrets, I can take daily action to keep my marriage on solid ground. I haven't looked back since. You can do this too!

I've been married for 8 years. The last 5 have been miserable up until recently. My spouse had not been happy in her relationship with me during that time and it took a long and slow toll on our marriage. I knew things were not good, but kind of "hung in there" hoping it would all work out. Then one day she hit me with the 4 words I had hoped to never hear; "I want a separation." And the dreaded "D" word even came up as well! I was devastated beyond my ability to convey in this article. I was shocked, saddened and at an absolute loss for what to do. How in the world could I save my marriage?

What do I really need to do to make my spouse love me again? Is it possible to build massive attraction in my spouse?

To learn the killer, advanced strategies to save your marriage, simply click here!

My response over the next few days consisted of the following:

- I begged and pleaded with her not to go through with it

- I went into a shell and didn't talk

- I agreed to move out of our home by a certain date

- I got very emotional

As it turned out, none of these responses were working. None of these responses put me in the resourceful state I needed to be in to effectively deal with the matter. As I was to learn later there were very specific things I needed to be doing and things I needed to be saying and ways I needed to be acting to begin the process of turning my marriage around and keeping us from divorce. One I learned these things, everything changed for us.

Do you want to reawaken a committed and loving relationship in your marriage? There are proven steps that are amazingly powerful that will help you overcome conflicts and breathe life back into your marriage. This is a plan you do not want to pass by. Click here to see the proven steps on how to save your marriage.

You've had it with her, you want to divorce your wife. She nags, digs into your stuff, she's even accused you of having an affair. Before you go to the lawyers, let me give you four good reasons why you shouldn't divorce your wife --

1. Divorced people are worst off than married people
Not trying to teach you to be selfish but you really are better off married than divorced. Statistics show that divorced people don't live as long as married ones. Neither do they earn more or get promoted more often. More divorced people commit suicide than do married people, and also are more likely to get depression and mental issues.

2. Kids from a broken family will have a tough time in future
If you have kids, this is a biggie. Most kids from broken families have problems later in life. We're talking drugs, crime. And they will also find it more difficult to handle relationships and marriage.

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3. This is the woman you love
I hate to have to be the one to remind you but this is the woman you spent your life looking for and whom you love the most. Marriage is never easy, all the issues and fights, but think deep and hard and realize that your love for her is probably still there. It's the arguments and disagreements that you have to tackle.

4. Saving your marriage is hard but not impossible
Of course saving your marriage is going to be tough, nothing worth while is easy. But it can be done. So go out, find ways to make the marriage work. There's no shortage of good marriage help books and websites. As you have read, divorce is not going to do either of you any good. Instead of thinking about how to divorce your wife, think about how to win her back.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

Author's Bio: 

Now you can stop your divorce or lover’s rejection...even if your situation seems hopeless! Visit Stop Marriage Divorce

There are specific techniques that will show you exactly what to do and what to say to get your spouse back in your arms- Especially if you are the only one trying... Visit Save The Marriage to find out more.

Looking for love and romance can be challenging. Discuss your marriage problems on our forum. We can help you find a great loving relationship! Go to: Marriage Forum