Self-improvement advice on virtually any topic that interests us, written from endless points of views, is right at our fingertips. Most of the articles I write are of this genre, often with a New Age slant. Websites like and are entirely devoted to this topic. A simple Google search will lead us to prayers, meditations, affirmations, and mantras that are aimed at helping us through troubling times. With all that knowledge readily available to us in our own home, wouldn’t it seem that everyone should be in optimum emotional health?

Much of the self-improvement information we read, and I write about, is based on some sort of mind over matter technique or theory. Some are logical and straight forward; some require faith and an open mind. What works for one person may not work for another, so there are many approaches that may guide us toward optimum emotional wellness.

Many people get frustrated with mind over matter self therapy because of the emphasis placed on tapping into our own energy and healing from within. We all have the ability to do it, but many of us feel blocked when we try and wonder why none of these methods seem to work. Don’t get me wrong; I wouldn’t write those types of articles if I didn’t believe in what I’m talking about. I am certain that we are what we think, and that we can change our lives by changing our thoughts. But it’s not always so easy to accomplish.

Unless a miracle occurs and changes us, some issues are so deep seated that the years of clutter must be cleared out before we can attempt to gain power over our thoughts. Patterns established in childhood are hard-wired into our brain. It is very difficult to psyche ourselves out of thinking the way we’ve been conditioned to think without the deliberate rewiring of our brains. Sometimes we may need a little help and that is perfectly fine. It doesn’t represent weakness or mental illness as some people believe; quite the opposite. It takes courage, determination, and inner strength to choose emotional wellness at any cost.

The greatest gift I ever gave myself was professional therapy. When I began, I didn’t know if it would work or how it would work. All I knew was that I couldn’t bear the emotional pain much longer. Certainly other self-help methods had temporarily eased my suffering, but the pain never truly went away. I reached a point in my life where I wanted all that nonsense out of my head, once and for all. Through professional therapy I was able to accomplish that.

Once the cobwebs cleared, my mind was free to embrace and focus on mind over matter techniques to promote my spiritual and emotional growth. My point is if you find that you are frustrated with trying to help yourself and feeling defeated because nothing is working, do the most loving thing you can do for yourself. Break the vicious cycle of pain. Get help.

Author's Bio: 

Randi Fine is a radio show host and relationship codependency specialist living in Ft. Lauderdale, Florida. By sharing her wealth of experiences, insights, and lessons, she aspires to offer hope, compassion, and understanding to those who searching for answers.
Randi has two adult children: a beautiful daughter and a handsome son, and has been married to a wonderful man for 23 years.
Her lifetime thirst for artistic, creative expression led her in 2008 to the challenge of writing her memoir,Fine…ly: My Story of Hope, Love, and Destiny. During the two year process of navigating through the unfamiliar waters of authorship, she discovered for the first time that she truly had a passion for writing. She now devotes herself to writing full-time from her home.
Love Your Life, is a journal that she writes to connect with others who share in her mission of spreading light, love, and healing to the world. She hosts the blog talk-radio show, A Fine Time for Healing: A Sanctuary for Your Emotional Wellbeing. On her show she discuss self-help and spiritual life-skill topics that will heal and enhance the life experiences of others. She is a deeply spiritual person, following an enlightened path of her own design. It is a connection that she faithfully trusts to guide her in every aspect of her life. Randi is also a jewelry artist who owns two web-boutiques: RaFi Jewelry Designs of Ft. Lauderdale finely handcrafted artisan jewelry, and Pink Ribbon Jewelry unique, handmade jewelry for Breast Cancer Survivors.