The most spiritual people I know don’t have to talk about spirituality to be spiritual. I sense them in the moment and their focus inspires me. I used to go to philosophical geniuses to satisfy that thirst, but now I find it in the people I love. Their expression of the heart directly talks to my heart without my intellect and associations intruding. It is as if I don’t exist when I am with them. Now that is a special gift.
When I focus on my thoughts and intellect that is how I receive them. When I don’t exist and receive them, my deepest wisdom embraces the moment with love. When I look to capture their thoughts for future inspiration, my focus is in my mind and I exist. When my heart captures my consciousness, my mind-created reality disappears and I don’t exist.
What a gift that is. My Mom inspires that in me and so does my lover, Amy. One of the most inspiring things in my life is to watch Amy dress in the morning. She has one useful arm, giving her one hand. She is so focused in the moment, her physical beauty slips into the background. When I join her in that moment, I enjoy the reality that moment offers. When I help her in any way, my consciousness begins to move in that reality.
My Mom has her own spiritual moments also. The way she plays with her great-grandchild captivates the love she has given her family throughout my life. I have an illness that she worries about often. You could say she nags me about eating right, but when I enter the moment she is in…I find that incredible moment. If I focus on her nagging, I receive her with my mind and it is sometimes annoying. When I receive her from my heart in the moment, I find the loving touch she has offered me my entire life. My focus determines how she is received. How could I ever complain about her in any way? I just need to be responsible for what I focus on within me. My Mom’s love is really precious and I just need to receive it with the quality it is given. When I do, regardless of what she shares, I benefit from life with the highest quality.
Many people complain about their parents largely because of the way they receive them. That is an example of looking outside of yourself to solve personal problems. Look within and receive life from the depth you receive life in your deepest spiritual moment. If you find that quality within, all your complaints in this world evaporate. This world isn’t perfect and that is why compassion was created. Embrace your complaints with a spiritual heart and your life becomes spiritual. I have many problems right now and this essay was written for me.
Marc Lerner coaches people in a struggle to live in that spiritual moment. Spiritual is not always religious, it just involves the silence beyond thinking connected to your heart in a selfless way. Go to for an example of facing challenges in a spiritual way that is real.

© Marc Lerner and Life Skills Institute 2010

Author's Bio: 

Marc Lerner is the President of Life Skills Institute and has been working with people in a health crisis since 1982. Learning to discover oneself in difficult times is the theme of A Healthy Way to be Sick, the e-book Marc Lerner wrote. Go to to read a mini-version. Learn this same technique to deal with any difficult time with the e-book, A Light Shines Brighter in Darkness, at the same website. Marc Lerner is available for public speaking and tele-seminars. When you learn to master inner resources and avoid negative thinking, you automatically tap powerful inner resources to become an active partner with medical professionals. Patient participation can influence the results of the doctor’s treatment. The doctor’s relationship with the patient can also influence how the patient participates in healing. Marc’s work is dedicated to establishing this partnership.