The Women In Love Stories

A few weeks ago I wrote an article about what men could learn from heroes in the romance novels their wives love so much. Read the article, “Living Your Own Love Story” here. Well, what can women learn from the main female characters in these stories? In her book, Writing the Great American Romance Novel, Catherine Lanigan discusses several characteristics that are imperative for the female heroine to have in any romance story. I believe these are also characteristics that are important to a husband and to a woman’s children as they look to her to be all that she can be for them and for herself.

Just like the male character, the female has an obstacle that she must overcome. This spurs the excitement in the story. In all romance novels, the female star is the “cog of the wheel” and everything else revolves around her. Sounds pretty good doesn’t it? In a well written romance novel, the character works through the chaos of the story using her strengths.

The female character must be intelligent. This is a similar characteristic to her male counterpart. Something that must take place with her however is that she must listen to those wise friends around her as she evolves into a better person. Both the male and female characters grow in the story.

Different from her male counterpart, the female must listen to her intuition. This is a big strength with women in general. Men have an inkling of it too; it’s just that they don’t listen to it very much. We’re too analytical sometimes. Inherent in the story format is that the woman must listen to her heart and be open to love.

She must be compassionate in an active way. She roots for the underdog, stands in picket lines and speaks her mind. She is the kind of nurturing friend that all females hope to be. She is courageous and in romance novels, she finally discovers the courage to love. This is part of the conflict. After being hurt or pursuing a career for far too long, the crisis in the story must push the female towards the ability to love. As the story climaxes, she realizes that she can’t live her life or fight her battles alone. This is the driving force that pushes her towards the hero, which is what the romance is about, and should be what your marriage is about.

Your kids, your career, and your parents are all important but none of them can carry you off into the sunset the way your man can. All men want a beauty by their side and Lanigan discusses the importance of the beauty characteristic. As we know, beauty must be internal and external.

What causes some women to lose their inner beauty? Some women grow bitter for a variety of reasons. They were hurt by their father and therefore are unable to make a deep connection with a man. They don’t like themselves and can’t see why anyone would love them. These are personal matters that if explored and resolved can increase the beauty in a woman tenfold.

Those women you admire in love novels so much, what about them do you appreciate and how can you be like them. Their example can be a chance for incredible growth in your life. Trust me, your husband will love you for it.