The Love Language of a Man

As a Relationship Confidant, I frequently get asked questions that could be issues of concern for many re-entering the dating scene. One gal was distraught over the lack of appreciation she felt from her man due to his memory loss when it came to special anniversary dates. She also felt he was not cutting it in the affection department during the day and seemed interested only at night.

As a Guy Spy into the Male Mind let me help clarify some things. Guys don't think like Girls – never have, never will. They are not designed that way. They are equipped to be a complement to how you are wired, not to be a clone. They rarely express their feelings and certainly not as often as women would desire. Don't expect him to open up and share his most intimate thoughts and dreams with you just because your girl friends do. If you push to make that happen you will short circuit the romance and the fizzle will replace the sizzle.

So how does a man relate to his woman? Through actions! Even as small children, boys are noticed in a crowd by the non-stop flow of activity. They got attention, affection and often times correction from the females in their lives because of their attraction to action. It should not be a big surprise to understand that they also show their love and adoration through activity. And because of this they will feel your love by what you do more than by what you say.

For example some men will be assured of your love if you cook their favorite meal. Others may sense your adoration when you massage their feet without them asking. Some may know the depth of your love when he sees you stand up for him in a group that is indulging in a men bashing conversation. They give and receive love through actions; thus the Action Hero. They want to protect, guide, correct, repair, resolve and relate through achievements and maneuvers.

Sadly enough, women frequently miss out on the messages their Action Hero is conveying because they are waiting for words. If you see this has been a pattern for you in the past, it's not too late. Let your hunk a hunk of burnin' love know how it makes you feel when he does things for you. When he repaired the tire, did it make you feel safe? When he worked out the glitch on the computer did you feel relieved? When he took you to dinner did it make you feel special? Don't lose site of his endeavors to love you. Learn to appreciate the man for who he is and the efforts he makes to touch your heart. Focus on the positive and pretty soon you will start seeing him in a new light. After all Action Heroes don't always work in the dark.