Do you feel like you're stuck and you haven't been moving forward financially? If so, you're probably suffering from the 3 Ps.
I see these 3 Ps over and over again, in my clients, in women I meet at networking events, and to some degree in myself.
1. Perfectionism is the first P. Boy, do I know this one! I call myself a recovering perfectionist, as I feel like I'll never be totally cured. Looking at the women in my family, perfectionism may be a genetic disorder!
Here's what perfectionism can look or feel like.
• I need to do things myself, because other people won't do them the right way.
• I don't like to ask for help. It's important for me to do ALL my tasks, on my own.
• When I make a mistake, I feel embarrassed or ashamed. If other people see my mistake, then I feel REALLY ashamed.
2. Procrastination is the 2nd P. Here's the way this can appear in your business. You want to do something that you KNOW is important for your business but you feel so uncomfortable that you spend a lot of time avoiding it. When you think about this uncomfortable task, you either switch to a different task that is comfortable (like looking at Facebook) or you make a physical change like leaving your desk to go do something entirely unrelated.
Typically you're procrastinating because you have a strong fear about whatever you're avoiding. Do you fear making phone calls? You may worry that you'll be bothering someone or that they'll judge you or maybe you feel like you're not an expert. You may avoid going to networking events because you feel like you're not an expert, or you may feel your contribution is less valuable than other people's contributions.
3. The third P is People-pleasing.
• Do you spend so much time taking care of other people's needs that your priorities are always last?
• Do you have a hard time figuring out what your likes and dislikes are?
• Do you feel overwhelmed by the amount of work you have to do and also angry at other people who are asking for your help?
These are some of the classic signs of people-pleasing.
A small dose of people-pleasing can increase your likability, but it can quickly get out of control. "Out of the control" is the key phrase, because you can easily feel like your life is out of control. You can't accomplish what you need to get done, and other people aren't helping you the way you want them to.
These 3 Ps keep you stuck in the same place in your business. Until you address what's underneath perfectionism, procrastination, and people-pleasing, you won't find lasting relief.
The 3 Ps have become a habit; you keep doing them over and over.
Why keep using them when they don't build your business? Because they help you feel safe. When you use any of the 3Ps, you get to stay in your own familiar comfort zone. You may feel angry or unhappy, but you also feel safe and secure.
Unfortunately, you'll also be broke. You cannot engage in the 3 Ps and make serious money.
You'll also be worn out, because using the 3 Ps sucks up your energy, so you're worn out before you even try to do the important tasks for your business's health. In effect, you're always fighting an uphill battle to accomplish the important tasks in your business.
CALL TO ACTION
This is a key place for you to be 100% honest with yourself. If you see yourself in one or more of the 3 P descriptions and you're not making enough money, then you are absolutely suffering in your business.
Think about the last time you procrastinated on something -- what are you NOT doing? When that task isn't done, how much money do you lose? And how much time did you spend avoiding work, instead of working?
If you're a perfectionist, how is your need to do everything your way affecting your relationships with other people? How much time is it taking for you to do everything perfectly?
Are you taking on so much work for other people that you make almost ZERO progress on your own to-do list? What would change in your business if you recovered even half that time to apply to your own needs?
Marcy Stahl’s passion is helping women direct sellers and solopreneurs achieve the successful lifestyle they want. She knows that the top entrepreneurs have the top mindsets. Her mission is to help every entrepreneur develop a profitable and abundant mindset.
Marcy is a serial entrepreneur. Previously, she co-founded and managed a government contracting firm that earned over $1M in annual revenues. She holds a B.S. with honors and M.S. in Computer Science from George Mason University. Prior to coaching, she spent 21 years in the corporate world in technology.
She is the co-author of Direct Selling Power. Marcy is an Area Chapter Coordinator with the Direct Selling Women’s Alliance (DSWA) and a member of the Direct Selling Women’s Speaker Bureau. She’s currently in coaching school for direct sellers.
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