***Stepping Up, Stepping Out: Taking Strides with Feng Shui

One observation I’ve made over the years from working with people who are integrating Feng Shui principles is that Feng Shui does not support you hiding out any longer. You are required to face the music when it comes to the patterns of how you live, the ties to your things, and the truth about your own destiny. It sounds pretty heavy but sometimes Feng Shui is nothing short of a call from the wild.

It’s nearly impossible to honestly consider Feng Shui as a viable way of living if you are not ready to step up to what may be holding you back. You may change something in your environment, but, if you’re not ready to embrace what that shift entails, you will either move your space back to the way it was or try to continue living your life as though nothing has happened. Either way, you are not stepping out—-I’d call this hiding out.

I see this hiding out syndrome manifest in several ways. For instance, one of the hardest actions for people to take is to leave an area empty. Not every corner of a room or every shelf has to be filled with something. Sometimes a pause (as in music), a quiet break (as in poetry), a clearing (as in the forest) are a relief. An empty corner is like a breath in the life of your room. Yet, I find people struggling with having a bit of open space. They may leave it cleared for a while but the discomfort with their feelings overrides the experience. Stuff gets put back. In turn, they do not allow their own lives to breathe with openness but instead fill up every moment.

Or I’ll listen to a client give an animated and frustrated discourse about a specific piece of furniture or a piece of artwork that they absolutely cannot tolerate. There are twenty-nine reasons why that item is unacceptable. The solution seems obvious to me, but for some reason it cannot be removed. It may be a partner’s preference; it may be a gift from in-laws; it may be that it came from their own childhood and everyone else in their family loves it. Whatever the reason, the despised object stays in place. The real issue isn’t the actual item; the real issue is avoiding a confrontation. Keeping it, although painful, is better than facing the consequences of getting rid of it. Yet by getting rid of it, the occupant would not only be relieved by its absence but also feel confident by the actions they took-----confidence which could carry over into other parts of their life.

I worked with a client who built and designed their own home. In doing so, they failed to think through what the experience would be like entering through their front door, focusing all their attention on the entry from the garage. As a result, when someone came in through the front entry, they were accosted by a blocking wall, a small cramped area for a closet and little or no space for someone to take off their boots or set their items somewhere. It was an awkward experience to say the least. Not only was it cramped, it was also unclear as to where a visitor should go. Although we discussed including mirrors and better lighting, maybe a different wall color, the solution was to remove the wall altogether. By doing so, the light would be fantastic, the path to the living room would be obvious, and no one would feel constricted. Although it was not a load-bearing wall, it was too much for the client to consider----it felt like a drastic change. What would the builder say (who was a friend)? Let’s just leave it the way it is. In other words, let’s just stay cramped and constricted----in the entry and who knows where else.

As you can see, Feng Shui isn’t just about the physical trappings of your space although that is certainly where it all begins. It’s also about the inner trappings. Correctly integrated, Feng Shui is about your outer and your inner space.

When a corner is left open, uncluttered, it’s asking you to breathe along with it and to expand. When something needs to go, the bigger question is whether you have the courage to release it or not. When something’s not working for you in your home, it’s an opportunity to make things better.
It’s no longer appropriate to hide out or hide behind but to let your wings open wide—-to step out in whatever way that may mean. It may mean taking outward action; it may mean moving forward with your plans; it may mean taking a risk; it may mean flying off with those new wings to great horizons. Let your space reflect that exciting message to you.