Do you feel uncomfortable when you come in contact with the opposite sex? Does this lack of confidence stop you from forming relationships, or asking someone you like out for a date? Many men and women suffer from having no confidence at all when it comes to meeting someone of the opposite sex.

Your up bringing can have a very negative influence on how you are able to form relationships with other people. For instance, did you have a very sheltered childhood? Were your friends at school of the same-sex or mixed? Did some boy or girl always make fun of the way you looked?

I know what made me have no confidence with girls in my early years was the fact that I had a very sheltered life. Also my older sister didn't help by constantly beating me black and blue. This made quite scared of girls. I know this sounds odd, but It's true, I was scared for a long time of my sister and her girl friends.

When I left home to live in London. It was here that I realized I had a problem. Every time a woman would talk to me, my face would heat up, and turn bright red. I could only answer in a quivery voice as I stared at the floor, wishing that women would not talk to me.

After a few of these unpleasant encounters I decided to do something about the problem that was making me so depressed. I started to read self-help books, and take night classes to educate myself. Also I took elocution lessons to improve my speaking voice. After a while I started to see an improvement in myself which eventually enabled me to have the confidence to win a scholarship to drama school. By the time I finished my acting training at drama school my problem had almost all gone.

It's not easy to gain instant confidence, but it can be developed over a time. The best way to start is to face up to your self, and admit that you lack confidence in certain areas of your life. If someone you like shows an interest towards you do something about it as soon as possible. If you don't you may be letting your soul mate slip through your fingers; all because of a few unspoken words.

Conversation has a very important part to play when trying to attract the opposite sex. Remember to let the object of your attraction do most of the talking because everyone likes a good listener - they make good friends and companions. Here are a few more tips to increase your confidence. If you put these into practice then you should see some great results.

1. Always try to look your best: make sure that your hair is always clean and tidy. Wash regularly, and use a deodorant to make sure you smell nice. Exercise regularly to keep your body trim - exercising just by its self-will make you feel a lot more confident. Just doing these few things will boost your confidence level, but the most important element for confidence boosting is to accept your self and like yourself. As soon as you do that you will find that forming relationships will be a lot easier.

2. Take risks: go out every day this week and compliment a complete stranger. The best people to do this to are shop assistants, or anyone working behind a counter. Just say something nice to them: you could say to a woman how nice her dress is, or to a man how much you like his shirt. Don't worry about their reaction, just do it! It can be hard at first, but it gets easier the more you do it. Try it, you'll feel great afterwards!

3. Mirror the other person's actions: when talking to someone you like it can help to mirror the person that you are talking to. Mirroring is matching parts of another person's behaviour, as in a mirror. Example: if the object of your attraction raises their right hand to their mouth, and you rise you left hand to your mouth, then you are mirroring the other person. Only use the same gestures as the other person now and again, and only subtly try not to let them see you, or they will think that you are odd. The other person's subconscious mind will pick up on the subtle gestures that you are doing, and will instinctively know that you are interested in forming some kind of relationship. Good luck!

Author's Bio: 

About the Author:

Dion Daly is a certified trainer in hypnosis, a master practitioner in NLP and TLT. He also has a degree in metaphysics.

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