For some people, social media is a way to stay in touch with friends and family. It allows them to get in touch with them personally and they can see what they have been doing by looking through their profile.

Along with this, they can look through their news feed and this will also give them an idea about what their friends and family have been doing. This may mean that they share things from time to time.


This could be because they like something and want to show other people, and it could also be a chance for them to let other people know what they have been doing. It could then be said that their priority is to inform the people they know as opposed to receiving ‘likes’ and comments.

If they do have the need to receive these things, it could be because they want to know that people have seen what they have shared. In this case, the ‘likes’ and comments that they receive will be taken as a sign that other people have seen their updates.

A Small Part

This is likely to be a sign that social media is a small part of their life and not something that they use in order to change how they feel about themselves, for instance. However, this is not to say that they won’t feel better through using it, as this is something that could take place.

After sharing a few pictures, for instance, one might get a few ‘likes’ and this is likely to have a positive effect on their well-being. And as they know the people who have ‘liked’ what they have shared, it can have an ever greater impact on them.


But no matter how many ‘likes’ or comments they receive, there is a strong chance that there are other people who have had a different response from others. On one side, this could mean that they will see that other people have had more ‘likes’ and comments, and on the other side, they could see that they haven’t had as many ‘likes’ and comments.

Yet as they are only sharing things because they like them or because they want to show other people what they have been doing, this is something that is unlikely to bother them. If it does, it could be an inner experience that soon passes.


When someone behaves in this way, it could be said that they have developed their own self-worth, and this then stops them from getting caught up in what happens online. Another way of looking at this would be to say that their value as a human being is not defined by how people respond to them online.

This is likely to mean that they have a number of relationships in the real world that are fulfilling and they could also be in a position where they have a fulfilling life. But while social media can be used in this way, it can also be used in other ways.

Another Way

There are other people who are more concerned with getting ‘likes’ and comments than they are with connecting to the people they know. Along with this, they will also want to get as many ‘friends’ and followers as they can.

In this sense, it could be said that social media is a vital part of their life and not just a way for them to stay in touch with friends and family. Their sense of self could be defined by what happens online as opposed to what happens in the real world.

Up or Down

So how they feel about themselves is likely to be defined by the amount of ‘friends’ and followers they have and by how many people respond to them online. Yet just because what happens online will allow them to feel good at one point in time, it doesn’t mean that this will be the case as time passes.

They could find that they have moments where they don’t feel good and in order to feel as they did before; they need to have a bigger audience and/or for more people to respond to them. While this could be put down to the fact that they have simply got used to how things are and need things to change in order to feel different; it could also be due to the fact that they have been looking at other peoples profiles.

Two Sides

If they were to come across people who don’t have as many ‘friends’ and followers or who don’t get as many responses as they do, they might end up feeling good about themselves. But if they were to come across people who have more ‘friends’ and followers or who had more responses than them, they could end up feeling completely worthless.

This means that they can end up feeling as though they are above others, or they can feel as though they are below others. Therefore, other people are not their fellow human beings; they are people who they have to rise above.


One way of looking at this would be to say that they see social media as a competitive environment and in this environment, their value depends on how many ‘friends’ and followers they have, as well as how many ‘likes’ they get. And through having this outlook, they can also judge other people in the same way.

So if they have more ‘friends’ or get more ‘likes’ than other people, they can believe that they are more popular than others. This could be seen as the ultimate achievement in life, and they might not be interested in achieving anything else.


It could be said that while one might feel good through experiencing life in this way, it is unlikely to lead to a very fulfilling existence. If one only feels good about themselves when they are more popular than other people online, it can be a sign that they need to take a step back and to develop other areas of their life.

This could also be a sign that they need to develop their own self-worth and this is something that can take place with the assistance of a therapist and/or a support group.

Author's Bio: 

Prolific writer, author and coach, Oliver JR Cooper hails from the United Kingdom. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation; love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over eight hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behavior, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice. Current projects include "A Dialogue With The Heart" and "Communication Made Easy."

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