When one’s life is not going the way they want it to go, it could be because they are going through a challenging time. In this case, it will be important for them to keep going, and to stay focused on what matters.

As to how long this will last can all depend on what they are going through; it could last for days, weeks, or even months, for instance. And while they may want to move forward, they might just have to be patient and to tolerate what is taking place.


It could be said that it is part of life to experience challenges, and although one might wonder why they are experiencing something at one in point time, it might end up making sense as time passes. But regardless of whether it makes sense, they might come to see that the experienced made them stronger.

This is similar how one might go to the gym in order to develop their body, for instance. The challenges of life allow one to develop their character, and while one can chose when they will go to the gym, one’s character can be tested at any moment.


It is possible for them to avoid certain things that would challenge them, but no matter how much they try to do this, it is not going to be possible for them to always do this. There are going to be some people who embrace the challenges in their life, and then there are going to be others who go out of their way to find them.

They are not going to be happy with the odd challenge they experience; it will be important for them to consistently face challenges. As a result of this, the people around them may describe them as resilient.


However, even though other people could see them as having incredible inner-strength, they might say that they are no different to others. They may say that they developed inner-strength through facing their challenges, and each challenge they faced made them stronger.

This doesn’t mean their life always goes how they want it to go, but it does mean they will keep getting back up, so to speak. The people around them are also likely to play a part in their ability to keep going each time.

Two Types

On one hand, there are the challenges that one can experience that are part of life, and on the other hand, there are the challenges that can experience that are not always necessary. These are the kinds of things that one can experience when they are sabotaging their own life.

When this happens, their problems are not going to be caused by others (although it can seem that way), they are going to be caused by themselves. One’s life is then going to be a lot harder than it needs to be.


Yet, unless one is aware of how they are playing a part in what is taking place, it can be normal for them to believe that other people are the problem. Throughout their life, for instance, they may find that they always come across the same kinds of people.

And while they might meet the odd person who is supportive, the majority of people they come into contact with might not be. Or if this is not something they can relate to, they might always come into contact with a certain type of person, and this one person can then overshadow the people who do support them

The Next Stage

After taking this approach for a while, they might start to look within themselves, and to see if they are playing a part in what is taking place. This can be something that takes palace after one has read a book or has had a conversation with someone.

It could then be said that the book or the conversation caused one to look within themselves. However, it might be more accurate to say that part of them was ready and because of this, they ended up having an experience that allowed them to take the next step.

The Mind

Once they start to look within themselves, they might focus on what is taking place in their mind. Through this, they will begin to notice what their thoughts are and also how these thoughts are influencing how they feel.

After doing this, they may start to think about what they believe about success, and look into if they believe that they deserve to achieve what they want to achieve. It could then come down to one needing to change their beliefs, and once they have done this, their life may begin to change.

The Same Story

However, there is also the chance that this might not happen, and one could still feel the same way. Or they might feel better but their life is still the same, and this is likely to be a sign that one hasn’t dealt with the real cause.

Although one will have conditioned their mind to believe something else, these beliefs can be in conflict with what is taking place in their body. The reason for this is that one’s feelings are not always caused by what its taking place in their mind.

The Emotional Body

As a result of this, when one changes what is taking place in their body, they may find that their beliefs and thoughts also change. When one feels as though they don’t deserve something, it is likely to be a sign that they are carry toxic shame.

Through processing this pain and being around people who support their inherent worth, they may start to feel comfortable enough to achieve what they want to achieve. They may also find that although they have changed what is taking place in their mind and released what had built-up in their body, their life doesn’t change

Another Reason

Their inner world has changed, but their outer world hasn’t, and while this may mean that they have more inner work to do, it could mean that they need to try another approach. What this could come down to is one’s need to be loyal to their family.

And not only could this go back one generation, it could be something that goes back many generations. This is going to mean that one’s life is not being sabotaged because of what is taking place within them; it is being sabotaged because of what is taking place in their ancestral line.


One way to work through the need to be loyal is to use family constellations, and this can take place in a group or in a private session. When this happens, there is no need to change anything; it is simply a time of acknowledging what has not been acknowledged.

Author's Bio: 

Prolific writer, thought leader and coach, Oliver JR Cooper hails from the United Kingdom. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation; love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over seven hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behavior, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice. Current projects include "A Dialogue With The Heart" and "Communication Made Easy."

To find out more go to - http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk/

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