Those who suffer from shyness or social anxiety care what others think of them. Instead of just getting on with their own lives they constantly believe that people are judging them. People who are shy believe that they are not as good as other people and that they cannot achieve what they want in life. The negative thinking patterns of shy people is what stops them achieving their goals in their lives.

The thing is people who suffer from shyness or social anxiety may be fairly at ease with people they know, but in the presence of strangers they will feel very uncomfortable and nervous. It will be difficult for them to eat or talk in busy places like pubs, restaurants, etc. Many feel a strain around the chest area, rapid heart beat and giddiness. They will stammer, blush and even find they cannot speak when with strangers. Some people will even have panic attacks which will feel like they are having a heart attack.

Avoiding social situations will be a big part of the shy and social anxious person's safety strategies. They will start to avoid meeting people because they could make a total prat of themselves. They will avoid eye contact with strangers because they do not want to be noticed. The may not answer the phone because they are too scared that they could start to stammer which will make them sound stupid. These safety measures that shy people perform are detrimental to their social and work lives. The sad fact is shy and social anxious people find it hard to have any positive thoughts about themselves.

Her are some tips on combating shyness and social anxiety:

1. Erase the negative pictures that you have created in your psyche. Instead of seeing yourself as that pathetic individual with no backbone visualize yourself standing confidently, smiling and speaking in a clear pronounced voice to someone who you feel uncomfortable with. It is vital that you visualize yourself being a positive person who can achieve their goals.

2. Stop thinking about yourself. This means don't constantly worry what others think about you. It is important that you understand that you cannot please everyone and you are going to have confrontations with people. You cannot have instant rapport with everyone. Just make the best of a bad situation.

3. Stop using your safety strategies to avoid negative situations. For example if you are feeling particularly anxious and you hear the phone ring pluck up the courage to answer it. Believe me you will feel good about yourself for answering it because it means you are not that pathetic person you believed yourself to be.

4. When you can feel yourself becoming over anxious and nervous stop and visualize yourself being calm and collected. Take deep breaths while meditating and say these positive affirmations:

  • 'I am a CONFIDENT and POSITIVE PERSON!'
  • 'I can ACHIEVE anything I PUT MY MIND TO!'
  • 'I am a VERY SOCIAL AND HAPPY PERSON!'

When you chant positive affirmations it helps you focus on the positive aspects of your character and allows you to forget any negative ideas you have about yourself. So go ahead and combat your shyness and social anxiety so you can become that super confident person you have always wanted to be!

Author's Bio: 

Belinda Daly is a certified master practitioner in hypnosis, NLP and TLT. She also has a degree in metaphysics.

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