There are a number of things that are part of the human experience, and having inner wounds is one of them. It doesn’t matter how good someone’s early years were or how good their adult years have been, they will have baggage.

Nonetheless, although having inner wounds is part of the human experience, it doesn’t mean that this is something that is widely recognised. This statement might not seem accurate, given the fact that mental health is receiving a lot of attention nowadays.

A Big Difference

However, when it comes to mental health, the focus is generally on what is taking place up top, in the mind. Changing one's thoughts and behaviour is then the most important thing and cognitive behavioural therapy is often the therapy of choice.

At other times, this might not take place and one could end up being put on medication. What is going on at a deeper level is unlikely to be looked into with CBT and it almost certainly won’t be looked into if medication is prescribed.

A Surface Level Approach

What is taking place on the surface is then going to be looked into and the symptoms will be treated. This might, at the very least, lead to a momentary relief but it might not do much else.

It will be very similar to a gardener who only cuts weeds off at the top, only for them to grow back a little while later. Or, if they don’t grow back where they were before, they could grow back somewhere else.

Maintaining the Status Quo

Unlike the weeds, one could find that one problem ends up being replaced by another as time goes by. This is something that often takes place after someone has been on medication for a while.

They can end up feeling disconnected from reality and themselves and their sex drive can disappear, for instance. These types of solutions can be seen as a manifestation of the ego-mind’s need to keep things the same.

Two Levels

This need has an impact on one’s personal life and it has an effect on what takes place in society as a whole. To the ego-mind, what is familiar is what is safe, so keeping things the same is seen as the only way to survive.

So, by only focusing on what is taking place on a surface level, it won’t lead to any significant changes. Society can then stay the same, with people being seen as the problem as opposed to society itself.

Going Deeper

When it comes to inner wounds, these are going to be things that one will usually come into contact with by getting in touch with their body. What is taking place in their mind, their behavioural issues and what is going on externally can be a reflection of what is going on at a deeper level.

Through dealing with what their conscious mind was unaware of at one point in time, they may find that what they have been consciously aware of for quite some time starts to fall away. In order for this to happen, though, one will need to bring their attention away from what is going on externally and towards what is going on internally.

A Number of Hurdles

What can make this difficult is that one may live in a society that doesn’t encourage self-awareness and is very much focused on what is taking place ‘out there’. Thus, there is going to be very little, if any, guidance or encouraged for them to go within.

Furthermore, one will have an ego-mind that externalises what is taking place within them. In other words, one will see in others what they need to resolve within themselves and they will have experiences that shine the light on what they need to deal with.

The Mirror

The world that they see ‘out there’ is then going to be nothing more than a reflection of what is taking place in their conscious and unconscious mind. For this to be understood, one will need to understand how their ego-mind works.

If they don’t have understanding, it will be normal for them to be victimised by their own wounds and for what is going on ‘out there’ to be seen as the problem. Trying to change what is going on externally can then be a consequence, which will be like one trying to clean a window when it is their sunglasses that are dirty.

A New Outlook

Once one understands how their inner world is being reflected back to them via the people they meet and the circumstances and events of their life, it will allow them to take their power back. Instead of unconsciously victimising themselves, they will be able to deal with their inner wounds and to liberate themselves in the process.

Ultimately, this is about them becoming aware of the effect that their inner world is having on their outer world; it is not about them shaming or blaming themselves. Most of what has been showing up ‘out there’ will have been coming from their unconscious mind anyway; so it’s not as though they have consciously chosen to experience life in a certain way.


If one can relate to this, and they want to heal their inner wounds, they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided by the assistance of a therapist or healer.

Author's Bio: 

Author, transformational writer, teacher and consultant, Oliver JR Cooper, hails from England. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation, including love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over two thousand, four hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behaviour, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice.

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