Saying "No" With Confidence and Conviction

The vast majority of adults – including your parents – faced those times when they either had to stand up for what they believed was right or cave in to the pressure they were feeling. Odds are, as you continue to progress through your own teen years, you’re going to find yourself on the hot seat, too. Have you given any thought to how you’re going to react to being on the spot? It’s difficult to say no to sex when you’re really saying no to someone you truly care about. It’s human nature to want to please those closest to us. We want to stay in Mom and Dad’s good graces when it comes to our grades, we don’t want to disappoint the coach on the field Friday night and we don’t want to do anything that would shatter our grandmother’s image of us – the list goes on and on, right?
Still, there are those times when standing firm means far more than fumbling on the football field. One of the biggest trials you’re likely to face as a teen is standing your ground when it comes to sex. It’s awkward, difficult and maybe even embarrassing when the subject comes up and you’re not prepared to discuss it or maybe after you’ve discussed it for what seems like the fiftieth time. It’s also a very important aspect of your life that will continue to affect you long after you walk the field to accept your high school diploma.
Have you considered a purity vow? This is a document between a teen and his or her parents that is designed to empower you and serve as a foundation for every time you’re feeling pressure to participate in any kind of sexual activity that you’re not prepared for. You can find a Purity Promise and a Dating Contract, at no cost, on TheQuietWitness.com website. These are powerful documents that will strengthen your resolve and serve as a reminder of the commitment you’ve made to God, your parents and more importantly, yourself. They can also go a long way in getting the message across to someone you care about who’s ready to move forward with a sexual relationship. It’s a commitment that leaves no room for doubt.
One of the questions that teens ask most is, “How can I say no without sounding like a goody-two-shoes?” Or, “I’ve said no so many times, and he (or she) still tries every weekend - how can I make him understand I’m just not ready?” These are tough questions, no doubt; but it’s important that you exert your worth. If you don’t, no one else will. The best way to do this is to be prepared with your answers already formed. It’s important to sound confident and definitive:
“I am just not ready. The thought of an unplanned pregnancy, having to face my parents and having to worry about STDs is just not something I want to fill my mind with.”
Another suggestion:
“I’m crazy about you – I really am, but this is a deal breaker – I don’t want to have sex at this point in my life. I need for you to understand that.”
A ready defense coupled with a Purity Promise or Dating Contract will make you feel as though you are in control of your own life and destiny. There’s also something very powerful in knowing you’re doing the right thing. One good decision always leads to another. Deciding you’re worth “w8ing” for is by far the strongest statement you can make to the world.
Original Content Written by TheQuietWitness.com