Rosh Chodesh Iyar: Vav: Truth and Beauty By Rabbi Shlomo Carlebach

Every month has its own letter of the aleph beit, its corresponding tribe, and its specific fixing. According to the Ishbitzer, the letter of Iyar is Vav, the tribe Is Issachar and what we have to fix is “hirhur” – “thinking”. In Hebrew there are two words for thinking – “machshava” and then “hirhur”.

Machshava means what I’m thinking with my head.

Hirur the Gemara always says, is what king in my heart.

In my head, my thoughts change every split second, and even if I think the same thing, I don’t think of it the same way. Then there’s “hirhur be libo” – you know I can walk around with one thought in my heart my whole life, and the more real I am, the less it changes. And this is so deep, like the Gemara says; my heart is only telling my heart.

Now let’s talk about the tribe of Issachar – they know what to do in the moment. This is very important. A lot of people know what they have to do always – but what do you have to do in this moment? We were learning it at Purim – why is the megillah called a book and a letter? If I love someone very much, do I send them my book? A book is for the whole world … but a letter – this is from my heart. Remember what Amalek said to us just after we left Egypt. His vibrations made us so cold; only 40 days since the miracles of Egypt and we were so cut off that we made the golden calf. Amalek says to you, “Yeah, religions beautiful, G-ds beautiful, the ‘always’ you have, but the moment…” I know what G-d is telling to all the Jews, to the whole world, but what is He saying to me?

The truth is the Ribbono Shel Olam is sending each of us a letter every moment but you’ve got to know how to read it. And this is Issachar. Somebody says, “I don’t know what to do.” Watch the signs. How do you know how you are to somebody? It’s how well they read your signs.

The Izbitzer asks,” What’s the letter Vav?” Most of the letters need other letters to pronounce it – aleph is aleph lamed pe, gimmel is gimmel mem lamed. Vav is the one letter that I only need the same word to pronounce it. This means that nothing foreign gets to the inside of my heart. The two Vavs represent Emet and Tiferet. The Vav starts up in heaven and comes straight down, non- stop because the truth is non-stop. We have to know the truth in our heart and know the beauty in our hearts. But did you ever see anything uglier than someone talking about their own beauty? How do you make somebody else beautiful, by giving them honor, right? Kavod knows no words, it comes from the heart. When the students of Rabbi Akiva couldn’t make each other beautiful, so to speak, the month itself couldn’t bear it. This month, Nature is mamish us how beautiful the world can be.

We have to work our whole life on this one letter – the Vav – truth and beauty. When Moshe Rabbenu came down from Mt. Sinai he knew Am Yisroel’s neshamahs were very high, but their heads were in the wrong place, so he had to break the tablets. But what did the Golden Calf teach us? It was the end, and Moshe Rabbenu went right back up the Mount, back to the beginning. Gevalt, Hashem, I don’t want to learn from the Golden Calf this year; teach me how to learn right from the beginning.

Pesach and the redemption from Mitzrayim is G-d’s revelation. Sefiras ha- Omer means, what am I doing with it? Everybody has to count in order to fix his own neshamah. In one ways waiting for G-d’s , His revelation, and in another I have to search and trust my own heart in the deepest way. lyar is the fixing of the heart. Nissan is the fixing of the head – a slave is listening only to his head. What does it mean to be in exile? It’s being so petty. Every year we are fixing again leaving Egypt until we receive the Torah. But this year I want to receive the Torah without making a golden calf.

Originally published in Kehilat Jacob News New York, Iyar 5746