When someone has the desire to achieve something, they can end up imagining what their life would be like if they were to achieve it. On one hand, they could believe that it will have a small impact on their life, and on the other hand, they could believe that it will have significant impact on their life.

If they were to believe that it would transform their life, they may also believe that all their problems would disappear. In this case, their life is going to go from being imperfect to being perfect.

The Illusion

However, even though their life may improve, it is highly unlikely that all their problems would disappear. What they are likely to find is that the problems they used to have are replaced with another set of problems (or challenges).

But if it wasn’t for their ability to believe that their life would be perfect, it might have been a lot harder for them to achieve what they have achieved. In this sense, the illusion they created had a positive effect on them.

Out of Balance

Once they have achieved what they wanted to achieve, they may realise that they were simply deluding themselves. They were caught up with the need to experience life in a certain way and this set them up to deny the other side of life.

One way of looking at this would be to say that they ended up deceiving themselves. Their may have been other people around them who supported their outlook, but they were the ones who carried it through.


Although it can be easy for someone to deceive themselves, it doesn’t mean that they realise this. This can be because they are focused on other people are deceiving them.

As a result of this, it can be normal for someone to overlook what is taking place within them and to focus on what is taking place around them. Through doing this, it can stop them from looking into what part they might be playing in what is taking place.

A Pattern

For instance, if someone is surrounded by people who are only too happy to deceive them, then it might be necessary for them to take a step back and to look into why they are drawn to such people. This could be a sign that they are unwilling to look at part of themselves, and this then sets them up to tolerate dishonesty from others.

Having said that, no matter how honest someone is with themselves, it doesn’t mean they will no longer come into contact with people who are dishonest. However, it is likely to give them a greater ability to recognise when someone else is being dishonest.

A Common Area

If someone was to think about a time in their life where they have been deceived, they might think about someone they were in a relationship with. Having said that, they might think about a time in their life when they were on a date with someone, and how they came to see that the other person was not who they said they were.

When someone meets another person for the first time, they are going to want to make a good impression. On one hand, this can mean that they focus on the parts of their life that they like and overlook the parts that they don’t like, and on the other hand, it can also cause them to make things up.

Best Foot Forward

If they were to overlook the parts of their life that they were pleased with and to focus on the parts that they were not pleased with, they would be sabotaging their life. Yet there is a big difference between someone focusing on their good points and making things up.

It could be said that it is these good points that will draw someone in, and then as time passes, the other side of their life will gradually appear. When this doesn’t take place and someone continues to cover up other areas of their life, they are going to be deceiving the other person.

Personality and Appearance

Along with this, they can also behave in ways that don’t match up with who they really are. When this happens, their behaviour is not going to be slightly different, it will be completely different.

There is only going to be so much that men can do when it comes to their appearance, but the same can’t be said when it comes to women. Not only can they use make up, they can also use special bras and high heels to change their appearance, among other things.

Internet Dating

Still, when someone is in another person’s presence, they will have the chance to see if the other person is telling the truth. This is not going to be the case if they were to talk to someone online.

The only think they will have to go by is the pictures they have chosen to share, the description they have written, and the messages they send. The pictures they have shared might not only have been edited; they might have been taken a number of years ago.

Other Details

Their description might not reflect who they are, and their messages could also be constructed to create the ‘right’ impression. This is because they will have all the time they need to say the ‘right’ thing.

The person someone thinks they are talking to is then not going to match up with who they are, and even if they were to talk to them on the phone, it is still going to be possible for them to put on an act. If they were to go on a date with them, they might soon realise that they were putting on an act, and at that point, they may have spoken to them for quite some time.


It would be inaccurate to say that everyone who uses a dating site is out to deceive others, but at the same time, someone can deceive others without even realising what they are doing. As it is so easy to make things up online, they might not think about how the person they are presenting doesn’t match up with who they are.

One approach would be for one to meet someone as soon as they can; through doing this, they will be able to get a better understanding of what they are actually like. As a result, they are likely to waste less time and it might be easier for them to find exactly what they are looking for.

Author's Bio: 

Prolific writer, thought leader and coach, Oliver JR Cooper hails from the United Kingdom. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation; love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over eight hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behavior, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice. Current projects include "A Dialogue With The Heart" and "Communication Made Easy."

To find out more go to - http://www.oliverjrcooper.co.uk/

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