It is often said that we are what we eat and while this is an area that is given a lot of exposure, it is not the only thing that one needs to pay attention to. This is not to say that what one eats is not important or that it should be ignored, what it means is that one needs to pay attention to other things that influence who they are.

The media often talks about how important food is and this then causes people to think about this area of life. And the media often defines what people think about and what they don’t think about.

So unless the media covers something, it can mean that one doesn’t think about it. It can all depend on whether one thinks for themselves or if they are happy to let other people do the thinking for them.

If one thinks for themselves it will give them the chance to find out if something is true or not. However, if one relies on the media to inform them, they are not going to know if something is true or not. Thinking for oneself might be harder than letting someone else do it for them, but at least one will be able to come to their own conclusions.

The Power Of Thinking

Through thinking and taking in new information, one might think about what else is having an impact on who they are. This could make one think about the environment they live in and the people they surround themselves with.

Although one could view themselves as independent, it would be more accurate for them to see themselves as being interdependent. What this means is that one is constantly being influenced by everything.

The Illusion

One could believe that they’re not affected by their environment or by the people they spend their time with. Or they might be only too aware of how their environment and the people they spend their time with are defining them.

One might notice how they feel after talking to someone they are close too and someone they don’t get on with. Each person is a fellow human being and yet based on how one feels around them, it’s as if they are from a different planet.

A Difference Experience

One experience could be described as life affirming and the other as something that is taking away ones enjoyment if life. And as the world is made up of all types of people, it is to be expected that this will happen from time to time.

If this only happens from time to time, it might not have too much of an effect ones one life. But if ones close friends or the people they associate with cause them to feel drained or invalidated for instance, it is going to create problems.

Unhealthy Food

Being around these people is then the same as one eating food that is unhealthy or stale. They’re not getting the nutrients they need to develop and to grow into the best version of themselves.

It can take a while for unhealthy food to have an impact on one’s body, and the same can be said in regards to the people one spends their time with. One might not notice how someone is affecting them in the beginning, but as time passes, it might begin to stand out.


If it doesn’t stand out, it could be because this is what is normal for them. Being around people who bring out the worst in them is then the only thing they have known. And this is likely to mean that their self-image is not empowering and that it doesn’t reflect who they really are.

So it is going to be important for them to realise that the idea they have of themselves is not accurate. It is simply the result of them being around the wrong people and as soon as they change the people they associate with, their self-image will begin to change.

The Sun

When the sun shines it makes it possible for one to view certain things, if the sun wasn’t shinning, certain things wouldn’t be seen. And this is what it is like with the people one spends their time with.

Unless one is around people who bring out the best in them, it is going to cause other parts of them to grow. Their true self can then end up being hidden and this is because they’re not getting the mirroring they need in order for their true self to develop.


If a plant doesn’t get the water that it needs, it is not going to last for very long. And the mirroring of others plays a similar role when it comes to their sense of self. If one doesn’t get the right mirroring they might not die, but certain parts of them will start to fade and then after a while, they will go into hibernation.


However, once one gets the right mirroring or as soon as they surround themselves with the right people, it doesn’t need to take forever for their best self to come to the surface. The first step might be for one to become aware of how the people around them are affecting them.

After this, one can decide if their best self is being supported or if it is being starved of the nutrients it needs to appear. One might need the assistance of a therapist, healer or some kind of coach.

Author's Bio: 

Prolific writer, thought leader and coach, Oliver JR Cooper hails from the United Kingdom. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation; love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With several hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behavior, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice. Current projects include "A Dialogue With The Heart" and "Communication Made Easy."

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