My Husband Makes Me Cry And Doesn't Care: How To Save Your Marriage If Your Husband Is Falling Out Of Love

In case it has reached a point where you realize that your husband is falling out of love, the revelation is likely to hurt you greatly. This is due to the fact that you still love him and would not like to see the end of your relationship. When you tied the knot, your husband was so passionate with you that you took it for granted that things would always remain that way. Now that your husband is drifting away from you, you are frantically trying to save your marriage. You are not alone. Many wives all over the world go through a similar experience.

In such a situation, many wives just let things take their own course, and they watch helplessly as their marriages crumble. However, when you realize that your husband is falling out of love, you need to take the initiative and fight for your marriage. You have the ability of getting your relationship back on track. How to save your marriage? You may ask. First, what you need is the correct approach.

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Take a look back

In order to find out why your husband is pulling away from you, you should take a look back at the initial stages of your relationship. Focus on yourself. What kind of a woman were you then? Are you the same or are there some significant changes? Although everybody changes with time, your changes should not interfere with the qualities that make you who you are, which your husband used to love.

Give yourself more attention

It is very easy for the daily stresses of your life to make you overlook your great qualities. Balancing all your various responsibilities may prove tricky. As a result, you may be hardly thinking about yourself. You should focus more on yourself. Bring out your special qualities that made him get interested in you in the first place.

Support your husband

Many women take the issue of supporting their husbands for granted. You should give your husband support so that he can realize that you truly value him. This is a great way to motivate him.

Learn to appreciate him by finding something to be thankful for every day. When you make your husband feel special, he will get emotionally closer to you.

Learn how to save your marriage before things get out of control. Remember that particular things you say and do will influence your husband to stay or break with you. The other side of the coin means that what you say or do can also drive him away.

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When you first got married, didn't it feel like you were completely on the same page and it would be that way forever? What happened?

All you know is that he just doesn't seem to care about the marriage or about you anymore the way he used to, and you do. You're desperate to save the marriage, but he seems out to lunch. What can you do?

People Change At Different Rates of Speed

One thing you can say with certainty about life and especially about people - things change. It's the one constant you can always depend on. What you can't depend on is the rate of speed at which things will change.

And the same thing's true about you, and about your partner. We are changing all the time and no one can absolutely tell what's coming next.

You Care About the Marriage, But Does He?

Right now your partner just doesn't seem to want to do anything to save the marriage. Maybe he's not communicating, ignoring you, and refusing to go to counseling. All you know is he doesn't show interest.

The good news is that you don't have to just wait to find out if things are going to be different. There are some very specific steps you can take - four of them in fact - that can give your marriage an excellent opportunity to survive and thrive.

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It's better to do something rather than nothing, isn't it? Let's get busy.

How to Save the Marriage When You're the Only One Who Wants To, In Four Simple Steps

Step One: Like

You must take four steps to save the marriage right now. I call those steps "LOVE," which is an acronym. "L" is for like; "O" is for openness; "V" is for value; and "E" is for encourage.

The first step in saving your marriage is to emphasize what you like about your partner. If you don't really find what you like about him there's not much sense in saving the marriage, right?

Usually we like those who like us, so it just may help for you to concentrate on what you like about him.

So take out pencil and paper and write down 10 things you really truly like about your partner. Having those written down will help you really focus on what you like about him. This is very good.

Step 2: Be Open

He may or may not want to tell you about his lack of interest in the marriage or what can be done about that, but the likelihood is that if he's not telling you it's because he doesn't feel you're open to hearing about it.

So now I want you to write down another list. Ten reasons why your partner might not be interested in you and the marriage right now. This is a very important exercise. Do it in writing. You'll be surprised by the results in your thinking.

What if your spouse already left you? Here's how to get them back.

Step 3: Give Value

What's the main reason we like being around other people? Sometimes it's attraction, sex, money, and their sense of humor.

But in reality it's because they give value. They give you something and you give them something. But real value on the receiving end is getting something you really truly want. If someone gives you a gift you don't want, it doesn't have much value to you.

So make a list of 10 things you can do to give your husband more of what he wants. Not of what you want to give because you think it's valuable, but ten things that he would find valuable. Then give them.

Step 4: Encourage

Find things your partner is doing or is interested in and encourage him. Whatever he is interested in is what he is interested in. That's how it goes. So figure out what is getting his attention and interest (because you know it's not you right now), and encourage him to get into it more and enjoy it more. Make a list of 10 things he's into and how you can encourage him.

Follow those 4 steps conscientiously and you will have done your part to save the marriage. You very well could make a major difference and get your partner back. Meantime you have everything to gain and nothing to lose by making the effort.

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It's a theme I've noticed in the couples I've counselled that aligns also with my own experience as a husband. Married life pairs partners who were initially alike, but are worlds different. And one key variance is what they want during conflict.

He wants peace. She wants to be heard.

Yes, of course, this is a massive generalisation as there are certainly exceptions.

There is a reason he wants peace. The relationship needs peace, but not at the expense of the truth. He knows she needs to be loved, and conflict, for him, is an interruption to the love he wants her to feel. If only there is peace there's room to love her - as he wants. But what he wants isn't always the right way. Truth also told, he wants a peaceful life as free as possible from family frustrations. His desire that everyone get on is good, but his way of securing peace is not always the right way. (I concede that she wants peace, too.)

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To learn the killer, advanced strategies to save your marriage, simply click here!

There is a reason she wants to be heard. Simply, she needs to be heard. And the truth is the relationship needs it. If only he will hear her at this crisis point, he will show her he's as serious about the issue, and the marriage, as she is. At root, it's about love showing itself as respect. If he listens - with genuine intent - he will prove not only respectful, but trustworthy. The bigger truth is both he and she need to be heard. Every marriage prospers when, as James says, partners are "quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger."

Good relationships find peace through effective conflict resolution. So both he and she want what the relationship needs. Both simply need to value what the other wants.

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Before marriage, dating was about pursuing and being pursued. Typically, a man pursued a woman by wooing her and by treating her well within the context of the date. This kept the excitement, interest, intrigue, and mystique in the relationship and served to bring them closer together.

The problem comes after marriage. Suddenly, the husband doesn't feel the intense need to pursue her anymore. After all, he's won her-he caught her-so there is a subconscious feeling that there is no need to pursue. Soon enough, tragically, interest begins to wan and that which brought the relationship together is no longer an active part of the marriage.

Dating, for the married couple, will renew much of the interest, intrigue, and mystery that they once held for each other. There was a time when a man used his imagination in the planning of a date, he made time for his girlfriend, and he put his best foot forward to impress her. And it worked. He won her heart and she won his as she responded to his pursuit. If a married couple could get back to that, the marriage will remain much healthier.

WHY DATING IS IMPORTANT FOR THE HUSBAND

Dating reintroduces the pursuit of a woman for a man. When that pursuit is of his wife, it is healthy. It will keep your interest focused on where it ought to be and will assist in stopping the wondering eye.

It is preferable that the husband plans the dates. For a man, planning for something, scheming to bring something to pass is what makes it important to him. I believe that God created man with an innate desire to dominate his environment. Women, on the other hand, typically want to dominate their relationships. So if the man will plan for the date, prepare for it, he will enjoy watching her reaction to his plans and his created environment. It is part of the pursuit!

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A married man is no longer pursuing a woman's hand in marriage-at least he ought not to be. Now, however, he ought to pursue his wife in other ways, for other reasons. He doesn't want to lose her affection and interest. Dating, specifically the dates he plans, will pursue this with his wife. She will react to it gladly.

Her reactions, hopefully, will fill him with a sense of accomplishment and will serve to rekindle the love and attraction in their relationship.

WHY DATING IS IMPORTANT FOR THE WIFE

Most women love to be pursued. To have a man pursue her is, I believe, part of her innate desire to be secure in her relationships. Security for a woman is perhaps one of the most essential elements in her relationships. If a man goes out of his way for her, then that provides her with much needed security.

The date provides a woman with the opportunity to express appreciation and need to her husband that feeds his interest and intrigue. It would be good if the wife wrote a thank you note, or did something special by way of gratitude and appreciation for the date. This will fire his desire and resolve to continue his pursuit of her.

The byplay in dating helps to renew her feelings of being pursued by a man she loves. This, in turn, helps to be more forgiving, less suspicious, and less demanding of her husband when she knows he is indeed pursuing her.

All around, dating is a very important ingredient to a healthy marriage.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.

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