My Husband Ignores Me When I Talk To Him: My Husband Doesn't Answer Me

Communication is very important in marriage. It is important for spouse to share their thoughts, feelings and be sensitive to each other's needs. The main cause for breakup in communication is usually a lack of understanding between the male and female talk styles.

Maintaining friendship in marriage is something that cannot be over-emphasized. Friendship binds a couple together and makes them comfortable with each other. It is cultivated when they talk and listen to each other.

When communication in any relationship breaks down, the very cords that hold the relationship together start to unravel. Many marriages have ended up in divorce not because of the enormity of what took place between the two people involved, but because they just could not engage in effective communication.

When negative emotions like malice, un-forgiveness, bitterness etc. find a place in our homes; they open the door for the devil to come in. When we have misunderstandings, we must overcome offenses so that they don't result to malice.

There are two sentences that have proved highly effective in abating anger and quarrels; they are "I am sorry" and "forgive me". The more couples use these words when fiction occurs in their relationship, the more they will experience peace and harmony in their affairs.

One of the major factors why marriages fail is that most couples do not understand themselves. Men and women react differently when they are faced with challenges and except we learn how the opposite sex thinks and reacts, we remain incapable of understanding each other fully and hence do not understand any chance of having a successful relationship.

Every woman must learn to praise her husband when ever he his running through trough troubles, as this re-establishes his self-esteem. Encouraging phrased like "I believe in you", "you can make it" and other faith-filled words will go a long way in inspiring such men especially when the words come from their wives.

Hence, i encourage every woman and men alike to draw close to God if you wish to experience bliss not only in their marriage, but also in their individual lives. In order to have a good marriage, you need God and you need communication.

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Find out the real reasons why your partner is insisting on a divorce. Chances are that you two haven't spoken clearly for a pretty long time. Since communication is the key to all successful relationship so go on and talk- speak your heart out but also listen with equal patience.

While talking, discuss and discover where the flaws lie and locate the problems. Do not be combative, aggressive and defensive in your approach if you discover that you were the problem. Approach this discussion with an open heart willing to change and make the marriage work.

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When you have identified the problem, do not sit back and relax. Do not be idle and do not for once hesitate to finish what you have started. A relationship is always worth fighting for. If you have to make certain changes, do it. Embrace the change, and welcome the happiness that comes with it.

After all a relationship hardly takes a minute to break but a lot of hard work goes into sustaining it. So make every adjustment and make every effort to repair what is fixable.

If infidelity was the reason that had forced you two to consider divorce, then it is better to search oneself- find out why you had done what you had done. If you weren't the one involved in infidelity, then, find out if you had an indirect role to play.

Was there something missing from your part that had tempted your spouse away? It is always advisable to be forgiving when such a sensitive issue is being discussed. Be compassionate for it requires a lot of courage to come clean like this.

Never discuss the kids. It is just not worth staying together for your children. This way not only do you cheat your kids off a happy future but your marriage practically becomes a compromise that none of you are happy with. So leave that consideration aside.


If you promise to make the changes, do so. Try as hard as you can to inculcate those changes in you and your lifestyle. Even a little effort goes a long way and similarly lack of initiative can dampen the spirit in a major way too.

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As Chris and I approach our 16th wedding anniversary, I think about what we have learned together through our own experiences and from other people's mistakes, both observing and counselling hundreds of couples going through some problem in their marriage. My goal here is simply to post warning signs along Marriage Road, so that if you see them on your marriage journey, you know you need to do something about it or maybe even get help.

This list is by no means exhaustive but I would rank each of these seven signs very high on any such list. Ready? Here we go:

1. Crisis in the bedroom department. By far top of the list, a couple's intimate life acts as the thermometer of their marriage. When a couple no longer or rarely comes together physically, they are leaving a wide open door for other problems. To be 'one', husband and wife must keep the bedroom temperature high. The keywords are frequency, selflessness, and quality.

2. You're not each other's best friend. Husband and wife must be able to talk to each other just about anything. No secrets. A best friend is someone you can confide in, is not judgmental, and whose company you enjoy. You laugh together. You know everything about each other. Unfortunately, some couples hold themselves back from each other and don't involve one another in their life. The result? Strangers sharing the same house.

3. Your best friend is another woman (man). As a married person, if you keep a close friend of the opposite sex other than your spouse, you're asking for trouble. Not only trouble in the sense that you will be tempted but also because you will provoke your spouse's jealousy. Want a friend? Read number two again.

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4. Problems linger unresolved. There's a golden rule that my wife and I set for ourselves early in our marriage: We will not sleep until we have talked AND RESOLVED any issues between us. A problem unresolved is a problem evolved. It will come back to bite you later, with a vengeance. Why wait? Nip it in the bud, get it over with.

5. You've lost respect for each other. When you no longer care what the other person feels or thinks, you're going down a very dangerous road. Call me old-fashioned, but I have noticed marriages are healthier when the wife lets the husband lead, be the head of the house, and when the husband cares for his wife more than he cares for himself.

6. You're putting yourself first. What's the first thing couples do when they get a divorce? Fight over who is going to keep what. In other words, see how they can get as much as possible from the other. If that is what happens in a divorce, the opposite must happen in a marriage. It's not what you can get from your spouse, but what you can give him/her. If you normally think about pleasing yourself first, you are not in a marriage relationship.

7. You don't want to listen. Experts say that effective communication is 80% listening and 20% speaking. The reasoning behind it is that we can't really say anything meaningful until we have listened to and understood the other person. In no other situation is this truer than in marriage. You can't have a relationship without communication. And you can't have proper communication without listening - a lot. Somehow I think God had that in mind when He gave us two ears but only one mouth.

Make no mistake, marriage is a difficult thing. But it is only difficult because people are difficult. If you try to fix the other person, you'll make it worse. You can only change yourself, not others.

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Many would think that marrying a best friend has a better chance to be successful, mainly because friends are like diamonds, they are forever. While this can be true, marriage is very much different with friendship. So before assuming that you are very lucky to be married to your best friend, I suggest you check out these potential problems that may arise:

Wrong feelings. It looks like very rewarding that you have the best of both worlds: friendship and love. However, you may be just confused with your feelings. Loving each other is totally different with being in love with each other. You have to talk about it seriously to make sure that you know what you will be up to. If you fail to do so, you will loose your best friend which is very painful.

Shorter period of adjustment. While it is true that knowing each other very well can help a marriage to be successful, it may also be the other way around. Take note that you will now be living in one roof, and there are still some details that you do not know about each other while you were still friends. The sad part is that they may even be the opposite of the things you thought you already know.

Overconfident. Since you will have a shorter period of adjustment, you might be overconfident with your feelings. You will not even think that there will be a possibility of betrayal. However, you must remember that too much trust can also be harmful. Therefore it is very important that you keep on sharing each others thought, just like before.

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Lack of romance. Best friends always want to talk to each other, sharing thoughts and have some vacation. However, romance may not be always present and this might lessen your feelings for each other. You will tend to forget to be passionate with each other which can make the love die. Romance adds life to have a successful marriage, but it is feels weird to be romantic to your best friend.

No one to run to. If you have a personal problem, you consult your best friend. If you will have a problem with your best friend turned spouse, who will you run to? Having your best friend as your spouse does not necessarily mean you will not have problems. In fact, it may be one of the reasons of your misunderstanding. This is because you are being caught between friends and lovers.

Best friends no more. As you go along, being married will be much greater than being friends. There will be responsibilities that are for husband and wife only like raising children and working hard for the family. Even before you notice it, your friendship will be just a memory to cherish. Do not allow this to happen because in the first place, it is the friendship that led to the deeper relationship.

Close friends are always open to each other. Lovers should always be close to each other.

Saying or doing the wrong thing can actually cause your spouse to feel even more distant from you. You can make your spouse fall back in love with you, all over again.

You don't have to worry about whether your spouse is on the brink of asking you for a divorce. You can control the situation and use specific techniques to naturally make them fall hopelessly in love with you.


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Author's Bio: 

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