Although there are people that can accept that they are co-creating their reality, there are others who are unable to accept this. In addition to this, there are those that haven’t even considered that this is so.

It could be said that this is not much of a surprise, considering the fact that they are likely to live in a society that encourages people to see themselves as mere observers of reality. What is going in their own life and the world as a whole is then going to have very little to do with them.

A Crazy Idea

Therefore, even if one is exposed to this information, there will be no reason for them to take it seriously. It will be easy for them to dismiss this view as something that irrational people buy into.

If they hear about the law of attraction as opposed to the law of resonance, it is to be expected that they would respond in this way. The former will say that one’s thoughts create their life, something that is a half-truth at best.

A Co-Creator

When someone can accept that they are not simply an observer of their reality, it doesn’t necessarily mean that they will always find it easy to accept that they have played a part in what is taking place in their life. There can be times when they will experience resistance.

It can be harder for them to accept this is if they are going through a tough time or if they end up being attached to their ego-minds defences, for instance. However, if this does happen, they could soon settle down and take a closer look into what is going on.

Two Levels

They will realise that it is not just what is taking place in their conscious mind that is impacting how they experience life and the situations, circumstances and events that they find themselves in, it is also their unconscious mind. Thus, they will know that a lot of what shows up ‘out there’ is not the result of something they were thinking about or even focusing on.

Through having this understanding, they will know where to look if they continually experience something that is not benefitting them. It will be crystal clear that solely looking around their conscious mind won’t cut it; they need to go deep within their own being to find the answers too.

Another Important Part

As they can do this, it will also illustrate that they have a strong ego structure or sense of self. Thanks to this, they will be able to face up to what is going on and take responsibility for their life.

So, something ‘negative’ can happen and they will have the ability to acknowledge what is going on, to be compassionate to themselves and then to do something about it. If this wasn’t the case, it would be very different.

A Different Reality

With this in mind, when someone doesn’t have a strong ego structure or sense of self, they will have a very different experience when something ‘negative’ occurs. What can be normal is for them to either blame others or to blame themselves.

This is because they won’t have the inner strength to acknowledge what has happened, to be compassionate towards themselves and then to see how they may have played a part. Whether they blame others or themselves, it will show that what has happened is too much for their weak sense of self to handle.

The First Response

If they blame someone else for what has happened, this will stop them from having to come into contact with painful feelings. Behind this defence could be a felt sense of being helpless and worthless.

Getting worked up and blaming others will give them a false sense of empowerment, something that would evaporate if they were to accept how they feel. The trouble with this approach, of course, is that seeing other people as the problem is unlikely to improve their life.

The Second Response

On the other hand, if they blame themselves for what has happened, they will end up collapsing into themselves. Their body could still be the same as it was before but their emotional self will have fallen apart.

This can be a time when they will experience a felt sense of being powerless, helpless and worthless. Lacking the inner strength that is needed to handle what has happened, they will be like someone who is pushed into the ocean with a lead weight attached to their leg; they will be pulled right down to the depths of despair.

The Solution

As with the first response, this is not going to allow them to do anything about what is going on. When it comes to both of these responses, then, the same thing will need to take place; one will need to develop a strong ego structure.

By building their inner self up, they will have the ability to take responsibility when something ‘negative’ occurs, to be supportive of themselves and then to make the necessary changes. This doesn’t mean that they will never blame others or others; what it means is that their go-to response won’t be experienced as often as it was in the past.


If one can relate to this, and they are ready to change their life, they may need to reach out for external support. This is something that can be provided by the assistance of a therapist or healer.

Author's Bio: 

Author, transformational writer, teacher and consultant, Oliver JR Cooper, hails from England. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation, including love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over two thousand, five hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behaviour, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice.

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