It has been said that it is not just someone’s thoughts that influence their reality; it is also their feelings. Therefore, it is going to be essential for them to pay attention to what is taking place in their mind, along with what is going on in their body, and to make sure that they are not undermining themselves.

Nevertheless, while it is easy to point this out, it is not always easy for someone to become aware of what is taking place within them and then to make sure that their inner world is functioning in a way that will allow them to experience a life that is worth living. But, once they can do this, it is highly likely that their life will start to move in a positive direction

The Norm

There are going to be plenty people on this planet who are functioning in this way, and this is likely to mean that it will be normal for them to have their needs met. Their inner dialogue will generally be supportive and their feelings will be nourishing in most cases.

Still, this doesn’t necessarily mean that someone like this is going to be a millionaire or drive around in a Ferrari, for instance. It could mean that they have fulfilling relationships, a rewarding career and good health, amongst other things.

Looking Back

If they were to think about how long they have been this way for, they may find that they have been this way for quite some time. There may have been moments when they were hard on themselves but, in general, this won’t have been something that has plagued their life.

What this is likely to illustrate is that their early years were a time when they had people around them who were loving and supportive. The way that these people spoke to them would then have been internalised, before slowly becoming their inner voice.

The Foundations

These early experiences would then have built them up, allowing them to develop into a human being who values themselves. The self-love that they have will allow them to feel comfortable in their own skin, which is different to the love that someone experiences when they have developed an inflated sense of themselves because they feel worthless.

The way that they talk to themselves and the beliefs that these early experiences allowed them to develop will allow them to feel good. How they feel will then influence what they end up being drawn to and what they draw into their life.


The reason for this is that human beings are not separate from anything, and this is why what is taking place within them will influence their reality. What can make this hard for someone to accept is that the mind sees itself as merely an observer of reality.

Therefore, if someone is completely attached to their mind and is unable to see how this part of them functions, it will be as if their inner world has absolutely no effect whosoever on their external reality. If someone is not fully on board with the fact that their inner world influences their outer world but they have empowering beliefs and their self-talk is generally positive, it won’t matter.

A Different Reality

Similarly, if someone is not aware of this it also won’t matter, as their inner world will most likely have allowed them to manifest a fulfilling life. When it comes to someone who is used to spending time with people who undermine them and regularly has experiences that are not fulfilling, it is likely to show that their inner world is not very harmonious.

They may spend a lot of time putting themselves down, and most of their beliefs are unlikely to be very empowering either. These beliefs are going to play a big part in the thoughts that they have and the feelings that they experience.


When someone like this is unaware of how their inner reality is influencing their outer reality, it is not going to be a surprise for them to feel like a victim. They may even believe that their rights and feelings are simply an effect of what is taking place externally.

Thus, if only their outer world changed, it would allow their inner world to change. One is then going to be passively waiting for something ‘out there’ to change and this is going to result in a very frustrating existence.

Weak Foundations

If they were to take the time to think about what their early years were like, they may find that this was a time in their life when they were not treated very well. They may have experienced some kind of abuse and/or neglect.

So, instead of receiving what they needed in order to develop in the right way, what they received would have caused them to develop a negative inner voice and disempowering beliefs. Additionally, they may be carrying a lot of trauma, which will make it extremely difficult for them to handle their emotions.


Not only can their inner voice make it hard for them to take action, this part of them can also tear into them if they make a mistake, and their beliefs are not going to support them either. And, if their emotions are generally out of control, it will be a challenge for them to feel good.

Due to this, they could emit a lot of fear, thereby setting them up to attract situations and people that will mirror back what they fear. These early experiences may have caused them to believe that they are worthless, and this may also cause them to come into contact with people who will treat them in a way that will validate this belief.


Fortunately, someone doesn’t have to experience life in this way until their time on this earth comes to an end. To change their life, it will be imperative for them change how they talk to themselves, to change their beliefs, and to heal the trauma that is within them.

This is something that can take place with the assistance of a therapist or a healer.

Author's Bio: 

Teacher, Prolific writer, author, and coach, Oliver JR Cooper, hails from England. His insightful commentary and analysis covers all aspects of human transformation, including love, partnership, self-love, and inner awareness. With over one thousand eight hundred in-depth articles highlighting human psychology and behaviour, Oliver offers hope along with his sound advice.

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