Jamie and Carlo fell in love while Jamie held a temporary job in the city where Carlo lives. When the time came for Jamie to return to her home-- which is in a neighboring country-- both of them worried about how to keep their relationship alive and well.
They considered breaking off their relationship, but neither of them really wanted to do this. They briefly considered having one of them re-locate to the other's city, but it felt too soon and too financially difficult to do at the time. Instead, Jamie and Carlo decided to try a long distance relationship and see how things progress.
One day, they hope to live in the same city and, possibly, to even get married. For now, they are looking for ways to keep their connection close and passionate.
If you are in a long distance relationship, you might be facing some of the same hopes and concerns as Jamie and Carlo.
Perhaps this physical separation between you and your partner is only temporary and you will be reunited in the near future. Or, it could be that, for various reasons, you don't know when or if you will ever be able to regularly have face-to-face interactions with your love.
Regardless of the specific circumstances in which you find yourself, you most likely want to do whatever you can to keep your love relationship or marriage close and connected across the miles.
Here are some tips to help you do just that...
#1: Create clear and honest agreements.
Let's face it, jealousy, suspicion and infidelity are not fun and they will not help you stay connected with your partner.
Don't assume that your mate understands what you expect and want from your long distance relationship. Instead, create clear and honest agreements with him or her that will help you two know the “rules” in advance.
If you met through an online singles website, for example, now that you two are in a relationship, will you both stop communicating with others you've met on the singles site? If continued communication is okay with you, what feels appropriate and what feels inappropriate?
While you might feel nervous bringing up some of these issues, do it anyway. It's far better to have your preferences and expectations out in the open than to later become angry or hurt because something you never talked about with your partner happens and you feel betrayed.
When making agreements, make sure that you both understand what you are agreeing to. If you are unwilling to agree to something, be honest about it and, with love, tell your partner why. Perhaps there is a slightly different agreement that you could make that will meet both of your needs.
#2: Get technological.
Once you have made the agreements that fit your situation and what both of you want, now it's time to have some fun and get creative.
There are so many technological ways to stay connected in today's world. Experiment around with a variety of modes of communication and see what works best for you.
For example, you and your partner might decide to each watch a movie at home at the same time and chat via e-mail or a social networking site (such as Twitter or Facebook) about it as you go along. This is way to virtually share an experience that can be meaningful and enjoyable.
#3: Be romantic.
As wonderful as looking at your love's face and speaking adoring words to one another through your webcam via a video conferencing service such as Skype or Google, writing an old-fashioned love letter on paper and sending it through the mail is fabulous too.
Be romantic with your partner in any way that appeals to you.
When you talk or text, express how special he or she is to you. You might be specific about how you are “stroking your arm” or “kissing your lips” even if it is what you are imagining yourself doing. When you communicate that, your partner can imagine the feeling too-- the connection that results is real.
Send virtual cards to one another over the internet, copy and paste love poems to him or her (give credit to the poet, of course) or find a song that fits exactly how you feel about your mate and send him or her the link to listen to it at the same time that you do.
A long distance relationship does not have to be a worrisome, angst-filled experience. Love is the reason that you two are together and love between you two is what you want to continue to feed and grow. Keep your focus on doing just that.
Want to know the secrets to a great relationship? Click here for Susie and Otto Collins' free report: "5 Keys to a Great Relationship."
Susie and Otto Collins are relationship coaches and authors who help couples communicate, connect and create the passionate relationships they desire. They have written these e-books and programs: Magic Relationship Words, Relationship Trust Turnaround, No More Jealousy and Stop Talking on Eggshells among many others.
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